Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Wallet stolen at school Christmas Fair. AIBU to not tell them

140 replies

onegiftedgal · 10/12/2018 20:53

...that I saw who took it? I'm not sure what to do as the chair of the PTA took the wallet when she saw it lying on the ground.
She put it in her bag and hasn't mentioned it even though the Dad in question has sent a whole school message asking if anyone has found it.
She doesn't realise that anyone saw her but what can I say/do as she would obviously not be likely to own up or give the wallet back now even if I did say something.

OP posts:
Yohooo · 11/12/2018 12:53

OP, it would be really weird to wait. Just send an email to all in Volvos saying you saw the Chair pick up a wallet and you wondered if that was the lost wallet. No drama needed.

I also witnessed the previous chair of the PTA 'covering' the hamper raffle stall. She was filling out loads of tickets for herself and shoving them in the barrel.

I find it really weird that you ignored that.

MacarenaFerreiro · 11/12/2018 12:54

how embarrassing and I'm not sure how she is going to be able to continue in this role

There you go OP, perfect chance for you to step up and volunteer your time.

BumbleBeee69 · 11/12/2018 12:56

She didn't forget, she received the exact same Email as everyone else, she was biding her time hoping it was forgotten about. Nasty woman. Flowers

ShalomJackie · 11/12/2018 13:06

Of course she will continue in her role as PTA as she was not challenged publicly and has made out that she forgot all about it until it was mentioned to her. She will just feel gutted she had to hand it back (if she had intended to keep it). There has been on public accusation so she will just laugh it off.

icannotremember · 11/12/2018 13:07

I'm so glad you said something.

And now you know, and other people will know (because these things never stay secret) that the PTA chair is not to be trusted.

TheQueef · 11/12/2018 13:11

Has no one learnt the lesson of Jonny and the Shoemakers?

Sorry, couldn't help that Blush

ReadMyLipss · 11/12/2018 13:54

What did the PTA woman have to gain from keeping the wallet unless there was a reasonable amount of cash in the wallet? Do people still carry big amounts of cash with them?

PattiStanger · 11/12/2018 14:10

That's a fair question readmylips but who could forget they'd picked up a wallet when reminder messages were being sent round?

Schmoobarb · 11/12/2018 14:12

It’s not even remotely difficult. Tell the chair you saw her lift it and that the dad is looking for it so she can return it.

AdobeWanKenobi · 11/12/2018 14:29

@Schmoobarb clearly more difficult than you reading OP's update...

ladydickisathingapparently · 11/12/2018 14:38

Three days? Good God.

My DH found an iPhone last night on the train; luckily the owner’s mum rang (by chance) a few minutes later and the owner and the phone were reunited less than half an hour after he’d lost it. I can maybe see an overnight delay, but three days? No way that was genuine.

minisoksmakehardwork · 11/12/2018 14:50

@ReadMyLipss, they could have used the cards, especially if they were contactless. Or if they knew the owners address - possibly if the wives are friends, they could have done a whole manner of online shopping/added them to PayPal.

It's Christmas. People stretch themselves to breaking point and then panic.

cardifcannonball · 11/12/2018 15:28

I could have been that PTA woman! I have an awful memory, and don't check my email as regularly as I should. It is entirely feasible that I could grab something, put it in my bag with the intention of handing it to the office. Then totally forget. So I'm not going to judge this woman!

PattiStanger · 11/12/2018 16:41

If I couldn't remember that I'd be worried I had a medical problem.

I can understand the not checkimg emails but how would you not notice a wallet every time you got something out of your handbag, I'm not buying an innocent mistake

BorisAndDoris · 11/12/2018 17:18

I hope that this gets around to be honest. No way did the chair forget about it. She probably said she'd go look in her bag to give her a chance to go fish the wallet out of her kitchen bin and withdraw the money that was in it from her nearest ATM.
Someone needs to keep an eye on her. At least she's not PTA treasurer.

ClaryFray · 11/12/2018 17:33

That family could be struggling. This close to Christmas. You have to say. Would you like it to be your wallet stolen and no one saying anything.

ABCagain · 11/12/2018 20:17

I am glad you posted this as i’ve just realised I have a photo booth picture of my late Mum and me in my Purse, i’m taking it straight out and having a copy made. Please tell, wallets and purses aren’t only for cash and cards.

poorbuthappy · 11/12/2018 20:41

I'd have to reply saying something like oh I'm so glad I put you in touch with the chair who picked it up!

cardifcannonball · 11/12/2018 20:50

Patti I do have a problem that means I have a poor working memory. I also have various bags that I use regularly, so something can get put in, sink to the bottom, and I would necessarily see it. You think it sound far fetched? Trust me, it really could happen to me.

Binglebong · 11/12/2018 21:01

Patti I'm much the same. Every so often I move on to another bag when the first is too full to lift I wish I was joking. When I check it again months later I find loads of things I forgot I had.

TSSDNCOP · 11/12/2018 21:03

I could’ve been PTA woman too. I found 2 dessert spoons and DS’s swimming goggles in the bottom of my bag last week. She might be a tea leaf, she might just have been fucking knackered from organisingvthe fair and de-toxing from the 10 zillion mails they generate.

dustarr73 · 12/12/2018 07:27

@TSSDNCOP 2 dessertspoons and goggles is not tje same as picking up a wallet.Putting it in your bag and "claiming" you forgot it.

Seriously who would forget that they picked a wallet up.

Hoppinggreen · 12/12/2018 07:51

Ive been a PTA Chair for 2 years and been involved with loads of events at a school with over 600 pupils
It’s never led to me “accidentally” keeping a wallet I found.
After such events it’s usually staff that lock up so there wouid have been someone there to tell
We are also paranoid about money, if we hand cash to each other when counting it we say it out loud and always have witnesses to the amounts if large. We also mention it on the WhatsApp.
I recently gave some change to another member to put in our petty cash and told her it was £2.50. She asked me to note it was actually only £1.60 ( in a rush I thought a 10p was a £)
We are scrupulously honest with the schools money ( we never even have a free mince pie when selling them at The Nativities)
I find it very hard to believe this wasn’t deliberate

ifiwasabutterfly · 12/12/2018 08:31

I think I would have to drop a note to the head just saying I'm sure it was nothing but ... it didn't sit right with me and I thought you should know.

Sometimes lots of little things reported make up a bigger picture.

MonaLisaDoesntSmile · 12/12/2018 08:43

Fast forward a couple of hours to now and she has just messaged me to thank me because she has 'contacted' the PTA chair who (bearing in mind that this is 3 days later) said that she'd just check in her bag (I mean how large is her handbag!) and oh, my goodness it was in there, how silly of her!

OMG, what a cheek. I think she would be better off coming up with a different excuse, although not sure anything would sound credible in the circumstances?
Happy the owner was reunited with his wallet!