Wallet stolen at school Christmas Fair. AIBU to not tell them

[onegiftedgal]

...that I saw who took it? I'm not sure what to do as the chair of the PTA took the wallet when she saw it lying on the ground.
She put it in her bag and hasn't mentioned it even though the Dad in question has sent a whole school message asking if anyone has found it.
She doesn't realise that anyone saw her but what can I say/do as she would obviously not be likely to own up or give the wallet back now even if I did say something.

Wallet may have credit cards and driving licence in and he will have to pay to replace that. Losing your wallet just before Xmas, awful. Poor man might have a lot of money in there this time of year. Do the right thing and email man.

I've had my wallet stolen which caused me among other things, to end up living on the streets. I would absolutely out her. The thieving bitch. How fucking dare she. Horrible nasty person. I think it's the lowest of the low to steal someone's wallet. All your ID is probably in there, and without that, you can't prove who you are, you can't get benefits, and in my case, I ended up living on the streets because of some horrible nasty thieving bastard.
I'd go nuclear on something like this.

I couldn't even get home to renew all my stuff as I had no means to get on a flight. It's the dirtiest act someone can do. By all means, help yourself to the cash if you're a thief, but don't bloody destroy someone's life by stealing everything that is worthless to you.
I feel the same about phone thieves.

I've had my wallet stolen which caused me among other things, to end up living on the streets. I would absolutely out her. The thieving bitch. How fucking dare she. Horrible nasty person. I think it's the lowest of the low to steal someone's wallet. All your ID is probably in there, and without that, you can't prove who you are, you can't get benefits, and in my case, I ended up living on the streets because of some horrible nasty thieving bastard
I'd go nuclear on something like this

I totally agree with this, OP I hope to goodness you find the courage to say something anything, don't let her get away with this crap.

This needs reporting. Like the previous suggestions of x found a wallet and might be keeping it safe etc

The thieving bitch. How fucking dare she. Horrible nasty person

Good grief.

Blondielogic
What alwaysdrama said. But also CC the dad in.

And the headteacher.

As a pta chair who runs events, firstly Ifni find a wallet or purse I contact the owner privately and return it. So would most people I know. This might not be an immediate message as events are insanely busy but certainly within 24 hours.

Secondly, I buy raffle tickets, drinks, bits and bobs from fayres and keep a running total and do a bank transfer for the amount. And yes, I've won the odd raffle prize, I buy tickets the same as everyone else. We have a policy of no private cash on volunteers because of the risk of accusations so keep a rally of spends.

This thread will probably do the job for you OP, it's very identifying.

Is that what you were hoping for?

How do you know that she wasn't intending to give it back after the fair but got caught up in everything. And now has once she saw the mail?

You need to be sure that it is his wallet, and that she is holding onto it still, before you start making accusations. Some of the polite emails suggested here might do the trick.

what bloindielongie said but Bcc the school in

Subject: i've got my eye on you Fagin

You must definitely speak up. Work on the assumption that she picked it up for safe keeping. I would email and say 'I noticed CoG pick up a wallet at the play: it belongs to XX! - I bet she's been worrying about trying to locate him...'
Copy Dad and Head

Exactly why I feel that saying anything could be a huge mistake. I saw her pick up a wallet and of course, didn't think anything of it until the message came much later and I believe that it was honestly enough time for her (they are friends!) to have contacted said lost wallet person.

I'm going to leave it until tomorrow and speak to the wife of lost wallet person. If they haven't any news, I will tell them that I saw PTA chair pick up 'a wallet' and they can follow it up themselves - at least I would have told someone right?

you know it makes sense

Why wait? He's probably cancelled his cards and will be worried all night. Just tell him what you saw and leave it to him to sort but at least tell him sooner than later.

Ok, I'll bite.

What the fuck has her being 'chair of PTA' got to do with anything at all?

It’s quite simple, you confront or ring the police. The longer you leave it the less chance of finding any evidence.

I really don’t understand how this is a delicate situation!!!?

If I knew someone had lost a wallet and I saw someone pick it (or one similar) up I'd simply either message the person who lost it directly to say oh yes I saw x pick one up, she probably has it or as someone else suggested if it's a social media post just comment saying I thought I saw x pick it up and tag her. Why wait overnight? I'd start cancelling cards if my purse was missing for longer than a few hours in a public place. It'd be a nightmare to have to get a new card at this time of year, once you stop your card you can't usually reactivate it even if you find it before the new one arrives.

What @glenthebattleostrich said.

As chair of the pta any events are manic for me and the others, we are planning and doing cash and carry runs plus set up. We have a hectic day, and it is possible to forget things, I forgot I had a bag of pta tablecloths for laundry in my car for a whole week after our last event. But anything like a found wallet or a purse would be picked up, I’d call a witness to check the amount in it and cards were “as found” and we would return this within 24-48 hours if we had a contact info. If I genuinely had forgotten, my witness or I would likely have seen the dad’s text. It is hard to know for sure what happened here. I would go with the “was that the wallet you picked up?” as a memory jog.

Isn't it more likely that she has just forgotten to hand it in? It's a busy school event after all.

Her being on the PTA or even chair of the PTA shouldn't delay your message to the dad. In fact if it is that she has forgotten she has it then your message will be a reminder if the dad chooses to speak to her. If they are friends anyway then he can find the right way to approach her and that might be more appropriate.

She may not have had time to return it but unlikely that she has forgotten that she is holding another person's wallet.

I agree you have to tell someone but also agree that if the chair of the PTA was an honest person, they would have come forward by now. It's unlikely that they've just "forgotten", given that messages have been sent out - if they had just forgotten, then the messages would have prodded their memory and they would have come forward.

So I agree with a Reply All style message, or telling the owner of the wallet (or his wife) what you saw and them taking it up with the chair of the PTA.

Hopefully the wallet will be returned!

Why wait? Just reply to dad saying that it might be the wallet that pta chair picked up. Nice and easy no finger pointing.

Can’t believe the people saying they would pick up then not rush to give it back. That in itself is awful. It’s incredibly time consuming and extremely worrying to lose a wallet/purse. If you find something that belongs to someone else you should return it straight away.