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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DD drinking at 11am? AIBU to think it's ludicrous?

94 replies

CharlieandHannah · 09/12/2018 11:50

DD is in her second year of college. She drank last weekend and got drunk, then had a couple of drinks last night and is now drinking again today? She has 2 mates over this weekend, but AIBU to put a stop to this under my roof?

OP posts:
ApolloandDaphne · 09/12/2018 11:56

How old is she? If she is over 18 surely it is up to her when she drinks. If she was away at uni you would have no idea what she was doing.

If she hasn't drank at all since last weekend and is having a bit of a Christmas weekend with her mates then fine. If she is drinking in the morning every day then not so fine.

gobbynorthernbird · 09/12/2018 11:58

Depends. Is it a hangover brunch with Bloody Marys/Bucks Fizz, or Jagerbombs?

SleepingStandingUp · 09/12/2018 11:59

Well you can do the under my roof my rules, it's she in a position to move out? Is she being a " bad example" to siblings? Drunk and lairy? Too skint for rent but not vodka?

Possumfish · 09/12/2018 12:00

Tbh when I was in collage this was normal....n my mum said better under her roof than where she couldn't know what was going on.

Travisandthemonkey · 09/12/2018 12:01

Depends if she knocking back neat gin and special brew
Or having a Buck’s Fizz type thing.

Not something to get worried about really!

HollowTalk · 09/12/2018 12:02

So there are a few of them drinking? Why? Do they intend to carry on all day?

XiCi · 09/12/2018 12:03

Maybe have a glass with them and unclench. You might even enjoy it

Original poster
CharlieandHannah · 09/12/2018 12:04

She hasn't drank since last week no, last night had a few cocktails but today they're on vodka and fruit juice at home. They're not being loud or anything, but I'm sure they will be drunk by 4pm? Yes all 3 are drinking.

OP posts:
LagunaBubbles · 09/12/2018 12:06

What age is she?

ApolloandDaphne · 09/12/2018 12:07

If it is a one off thing then just leave them to it. It doesn't sound like she has any issues but is just having some fun with her friends. If they had gone out for lunch at 12 and had wine no-one would bat an eye.

LastOneDancing · 09/12/2018 12:07

Getting drunk once last weekend, then a couple of drinks last night sounds extremely mild for an 18yo to me.

If theyre having a Bailey's coffee or something this morning, it wouldn't be for me, but it's hardly excessive. If as PP said it's jagerbombs, I might be more concerned.

But your house, your rules.

Original poster
CharlieandHannah · 09/12/2018 12:09

She is 18, yes

OP posts:
HaudYerWheeshtYaWeeBellend · 09/12/2018 12:10

You cant stop your adult child doing anything, however as its in your house you can ask them to drink elsewhere

I had a glass of wine last week at 11.30am, with friends while we went out for brunch, its not uncommon.

AmyDowdensLeftLeftShoe · 09/12/2018 12:14

You are being over the top.

She clearly isn't an alcoholic and having fun with two mates.

If she started at 11am every couple of days then you have a legitimate right to have a good talk with her.

Btw I have alcoholics amongst my family and friends'.

NoelGallaghersEyebrows · 09/12/2018 12:14

Sunday all day drinking was one of my favourite days when I was 18-23 or thereabouts (although usually starting in a pub whilst having lunch)

She sounds like quite a tame 18 year old alcohol wise and it's not a weekly occurrence so I would leave her to it.

alreadytaken · 09/12/2018 12:16

How long are the mates staying, who is providing the drink and is anyone planning to drive later? I wouldnt be providing the drink and I'd probably have a few words after the mates had gone but I'd only try and stop it if anyone is driving later.

ManicUnicorn · 09/12/2018 12:20

18 year old student gets drunk shocker.....

Get a grip OP, if she was drinking at 11am everyday then you'd have cause to worry but I'm assuming it's a one off because she's got friends over and it's Christmas.

And I'd imagine she's far safer doing it at home.

ThatOneHurt · 09/12/2018 12:22

I love day drinking occasionally!

Which is basically never now because I have kids.

Let her get on with it, she won't be 18 forever. Tell her to have a cocktail for me!

Loftyswops988 · 09/12/2018 12:33

vodka and fruit juice in the morning, just sounds like a bit of a hangover cure to be honest! not much different to a bloody mary. I would only worry if this was a regular occurence. 18 year olds do drink..

Lunde · 09/12/2018 12:35

Students having Sunday lunchtime drinks - shocker! not

CurlyWurlyTwirly · 09/12/2018 12:36

Sunday "brunchtime" a couple of weeks before Christmas, with some friends sounds ok to me.
Are you expected to drive the friends to the station or something? Are they being rowdy. tbh, if you cant let your hair down when you're an 18yo student; when can you....?!

LakieLady · 09/12/2018 12:37

The sun's over the yardarm, and it's the perfect time for a G&T.

In fact, I think I'll have one ...

ReanimatedSGB · 09/12/2018 12:45

Do you want to embarrass and humiliate your DD in front of her mates by treating her like a baby (and insulting her friends, as well - you are not responsible for their drinking habits)? Unless she is drinking stuff that you bought in for Christmas, or being rowdy and upsetting the rest of the household, then you need to keep your beak out.

cementpointing · 09/12/2018 12:48

i wouldn't particularly like it either but would be glad she isn't getting high as a kite on mdma at an after club party and is at home where she you can sort of keep one eye on her. i

ts a bit of an odd situation even for an 18 yo - drinking at home on a sunday morning. re they all showered and dressed? where are they drinking, in living room?

Travisandthemonkey · 09/12/2018 13:05

God if I think of some of the messy things I did of a weekend at that age!!
Really you’re very lucky.

I would actively push an 18 year old to go live somewhere else for college and try to experiment and experience life away from home. It’s an amazing experience and I would feel disappointed if my dd wanted to live at home. I mean obviously it’s her choice, but so many of our choices are informed by our parents

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