Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

No invite to the wedding?

109 replies

alicert · 08/12/2018 20:15

I have two close friends and through them introduced to 3 other girls.
We go out socially on nights out and holidays etc.
One of these girls was getting married today.
Me and the other 4 girls planned her hen weekend and all went away for two nights.
The girls were talking about how good her wedding would be but I got no invite.
Now I assumed I wouldn't be invited to the wedding but I assumed I would get a invite to the reception.
Nothing ...I'm the only one who went on the hen weekend without a invite.
I feel like such a idiot,now clearly I wouldn't of been missed if I hadn't of went on the weekend away as I didn't make the reception cut.
Bare in mind the reception is just a disco with a bar (you have to pay for own drinks) so she wouldn't have to pay etc
I feel like a idiot.

OP posts:
Original poster
alicert · 08/12/2018 20:46

We are more social friends than actual friends but why invite me to hen do.
Also last month we shared a hotel room,and went out for a drink together

OP posts:
Rafflesway · 08/12/2018 20:48

Exactly my thought Berthatydfil!

I would be ghosting fucking off the lot of them! They obviously don't give a shit about you either as they definitely knew you hadn't been invited.

What a bitchy, nasty carry on! Who needs enemies with "Friends" like these? 😓

Didntwanttochangemyname · 08/12/2018 20:49

She is a grade A bitch, I'm shocked at her behaviour!
I'm so sorry OP, don't feel like a loser at all, this reflects badly on her, not you!

MotherOfDragonite · 08/12/2018 20:51

What kind of weirdo invites somebody to the hen do who they aren't inviting to their wedding?!!

Popfan · 08/12/2018 20:51

What did the other friends have to say about it?

lisasimpsonssaxophone · 08/12/2018 20:52

Wait so you not only went on the hen weekend but actually helped to organise it?!

That’s so outrageous l’d have to wonder if there’s been some kind of mix up. Maybe leave it a few weeks then get in touch to let her know how hurt you are.

Blankscreen · 08/12/2018 20:54

Op that's really hurtful. If you can don't look at any more photos but that is easier said than done.

I think you need to be honest with the other two about how you feel about the whole thing. It will be awkward but you have nothing to lose. How they react will tell you if you want to continue being friend with them. As for the bride I would certainly give her a wide berth and avoid any post wedding meet ups/photo sharing etc.

Bride is a fucking bitch btw.

InstagramPork · 08/12/2018 20:56

She’s a nasty cunt

Blankscreen · 08/12/2018 20:57

When did you out in for the present? Was it before or after invites were issued?
Did you know you weren't going when you contributed? Did the others know?

bringbackthestripes · 08/12/2018 20:57

Ali that is awful Flowers I’m assuming your friends think it’s awful you haven’t been invited-haven’t any of them asked why you haven’t had an invite? I would certainly ask the bride what was going on if I found out one of my friends that had been on the hen do hadn’t been invited!

ksa103 · 08/12/2018 20:59

Could you have been invited and the invite got lost in post?

Thierryhenryneedisaymore · 08/12/2018 20:59

To be honest i would not be having anything to do with any of them again.
It is incredibly hurtful but to be honest the sooner you put them behind you the better.
If i was one of the other fiends who had been invited i would have said to her how she was being shitty.
Complete arseholes. What age are they, 15?!

Butteredghost · 08/12/2018 21:01

Oh dear this is horrible and weird. It's so weird though, are you 100% sure there hasn't been some kind of mistake? I'm surprised you didn't bring it up with one of the other friends, and ask them to suss out what was going on.

Winterishere2018 · 08/12/2018 21:02

We are more social friends than actual friends but why invite me to hen do

It sounds like she’s more a friend out of association than a friend separately. Do you met up outside the friendship or is it always or the majority with you’re two friends in common. It’s prerty shitty to exclude you though out of the wedding if she was including you on the hen do.

Original poster
alicert · 08/12/2018 21:04

They all knew I wasn't invited as they have a separate wedding night WhatsApp group and had booked hotel rooms last month so they could make a night of it.
I kinda knew I wasn't even invited to the reception on the hen night as they were all chatting about booking rooms etc.

OP posts:
Lynne45 · 08/12/2018 21:04

Awful. Did your other friends not ask her why you weren’t invited? I’d expect them to stick up for you!

Original poster
alicert · 08/12/2018 21:05

It is when other friends are there but still not to even make the cut to the reception (which is just a glorified pub night ) bit hurtful.

OP posts:
Original poster
alicert · 08/12/2018 21:06

The other friends have just said I'm sure she wouldn't mind you popping along on the night.
(As if I would do that tho )

OP posts:
DiaryofWimpyMum · 08/12/2018 21:07

That's really nasty of them discussing room bookings etc if you weren't invited. Put away the snap chat and try take your mind off it. It's awful for you!

ChasedByBees · 08/12/2018 21:08

You shouldn’t feel bad about this, it’s her that has behaved terribly. To invite you to the hen night but not the wedding is appalling.

BumbleBeee69 · 08/12/2018 21:09

this is SHIT OP Flowers

WilburforceRaven · 08/12/2018 21:10

Wow. Think I'd be cutting the lot of them a wide berth from now on. Lesson learned. Just be busy from now on, can't make it, have other plans.

jarhead123 · 08/12/2018 21:14

Agree with everyone, this says more about her than you. She sounds spiteful.

Rhynswynd · 08/12/2018 21:15

Snapchat back a photo of you in your PJs and a glass of wine. #notinvited
I am very petty and passive aggressive. not my best qualities

Winterishere2018 · 08/12/2018 21:18

I think the issue she doesn’t see a friendship outside of the friends you share in common which is completely fine to do so, however it was awfully unkind to include you in the prewedding celebrations if she wasn’t going to include you in the actual celebration, that being said your friends haven’t been true friends to go along with it all.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.