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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be in shock about what a delivery driver just did??

207 replies

ArghhhWhatToDo · 07/12/2018 10:16

Happy to be told IABU but a delivery driver pulled up outside my house, I was in the kitchen washing up so saw him walking down the path, I waited for the knock to go and answer but instead they just OPENED MY FRONT DOOR and placed the parcel in the hallway.

Usually the door is locked but I have a handyman in fixing our shower so have left it unlocked so he can come and go to his van as he needs.

I am not over reacting, this is shocking right???? I had my 4 year old playing in the front room who screamed when she saw the man.

I ran out and confronted them, telling him it was not acceptable to just open a persons front door and they should have knocked and waited, he responded that it is raining...WTAF?

Just sent a rather ranty email to the delivery company he works for and my DH is equally shocked as is the handyman who heard me shouting and rushed down to see if everything was ok.

I would never dream of opening the front door of people I know well, so why would they think it is ok to enter a house of strangers.

Am 4 weeks from my due date and have been slightly irrational so happy to be told I am OTT here.

OP posts:
Missingmysanity · 07/12/2018 12:36

I am quite relaxed about this, but then I live in a village where this is the norm and I do not have any pets that could escape.

I am struggling with some of the more personal comments regarding the OP house, DD and the fact she dared dry her hands before making her way to the door. In reality we all expect a visitor to knock and she made the point of explaining it was a very short distance from her gate to her door.

Variety is great, we all have different standards, expectations and agreements on what is acceptable so I personally think that for someone who is not used to this it can be a shock.

My youngest son was very sensitive when he was a toddler and pretty sure he would have reacted similarly to someone walking in the house. He once ran screaming from my dad who had shaved his beard when he entered the room.

Anyway OP I am glad your door will be locked from now on, it is the best way to avoid such incidents. Also my son who works for a well known delivery company has said before when we have discussed such things that this puts them at a lot of risk and company policy is to not enter any private property unless written agreement is provided.

Wishing you a lovely Christmas OP.

Lweji · 07/12/2018 12:39

I'd keep the complaint. At the very least he should have knocked first to warn you he was going in. Even in areas where people leave doors unlocked all the time.
He's a professional, and it's the professional attitude to have without specific instructions.

Yokohamajojo · 07/12/2018 12:40

Happened to us as well this week! my husband was actually in the front garden but behind some bushes doing something and hence had left front door open! delivery man didn't see him and proceeded to open the door and put the parcel in the hall way!

Isitweekendyet · 07/12/2018 12:41

We had a delivery man vault our back wall that is 6ft high and store a package in our shed. If anything he did us a favour that we needed to make our property more secure!

But we complained, it's not on, I'd rather have to go and collect it than have a stranger trying to get into my house!

Missingmysanity · 07/12/2018 12:42

@Nursejackie1 perfectly norm for people who are accepting of such behaviour. Not for someone who has not given permission for this to happen. This almost certainly breaks company policy so OP is well within her rights to maintain the complaint. She was clear that her email included a request for nothing untoward to happen to the driver so chances are they will just re-illiterate their policy.

tillytrotter1 · 07/12/2018 12:45

We've told the postit to open the door and chuck stuff into the porch, the letter box is small and lethal, she was very grateful!

tillytrotter1 · 07/12/2018 12:45

postie, not postit!

ADastardlyThing · 07/12/2018 12:45

Agree with lewji op should definitely keep the complaint in, might be acceptable for some people but it shouldn't be the default position (obviously!) to go around opening people's doors uninvited and if the driver gets a bollocking for doing it it will be because the company don't think its acceptable either.

It's to protect the driver's too. They are putting themselves at risk of all sorts by just opening people's doors if they don't know the home owners are ok with it.

masterandmargarita · 07/12/2018 12:46

You can't open our front door witbout a key. I wouldn't mind the delivery guy doing that though if you could. Save me the hassle of opening it!

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee · 07/12/2018 12:48

I have had this happen and don't mind at all. They just pop the parcel in and close the door. If I minded I would
Lock the front door.

They don't actually come in the house they just pop the parcel through the open door.
Take about a second.

I'm surprised your child screamed. Surely they would have barely got a chance to see the guy let alone be scared by him. Especially as you had a workman coming and going anyway.

curious86 · 07/12/2018 12:57

You are definitely not in the wrong. I've never heard of any delivery driver just opening the door, that could of been such a traumatic experience for you and your family, plus you could of had a dog that escaped. The company should definitely do something about it

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee · 07/12/2018 12:58

I think when a stranger walks in to your house it is normal (for most people) to be taken aback by it

C'mon, I bet you are exaggerating... I bet he only opened the door a little and popped the parcel in.

Also, you could see he was a delivery driver - presumably you could see his van and perhaps he had a company logo on his clothes. I know he is technically a 'stranger' but it's not like some random guy just appearing in your living room. He wouldn't expect you to be surprised.

gamerchick · 07/12/2018 12:58

Man I love a whiny thread to start a weekend GrinGrinGrin

If it helps if a driver is well in his ETAs he might try and shave time off to keep in them. Going out of ETAs have consequences.

Not your problem I know but in future.... Lock your door. Saves needing smelling salts for the shock Wink

Bluearsedfly36 · 07/12/2018 13:22

All my delivery drivers do this. Just leave it by the door. A couple of the drivers sometimes are here at 9pm and I'm usually busy sorting the kids etc and never notice them coming. If the door is locked they put it in the garage.

Scottishscummy · 07/12/2018 13:28

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

sonandhelpneeded · 07/12/2018 13:30

Do you were 1 second from the front door saw him coming but did t just open the door ready! Your daughter was playing in the front room but screamed because she saw the man. But he hasn't entered the house just opened the door put the parcel inside and closed it?

So what made your 4 year old scream?

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 07/12/2018 13:30

YANBU. My door is either locked or open. So it wouldn’t happen to me. But I wouldn’t expect a delivery driver to open a closed door and put a parcel inside, I’d expect a knock and a parcel on the doorstep if they could see I was in but unable to answer the door.

Personally I think it’s overstepping.

GunpowderGelatine · 07/12/2018 13:30

My postie once did this I was Shock

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 07/12/2018 13:32

OP clearly you are remiss at not providing a to scale diagram of your home with yours and your daughter’s positions clearly marked, plus atomic clock timings for how long to reach the door.

Shame on you!

Freddiesgirl · 07/12/2018 13:39

This is very normal where I live! I hate it when we have a new driver and they leave the card, we’re miles from a local delivery office!

sonandhelpneeded · 07/12/2018 13:40

@Frosty66611 presumably if that's the set up of your house you'd lock the front door?

Why would you get into the shower and leave a front door unlocked? You could get burgled for one thing!

MumW · 07/12/2018 13:51

For what it's worth, OP, I would feel as you do.

It would seem normal and common courtesy
to knock/ring a couple of times
Maybe then try the door and call out something like "Hello, is anyone there, Parcel delivery".
Pop the parcel inside the door and say "Left it just inside the door, Bye".
Close the door firmly.

Weirdpenguin · 07/12/2018 13:56

He shouldn't have opened the door but you were a bit selfish to see him in the rain and wait for him to knock.

dinosaurglitterrepublic · 07/12/2018 13:57

Seems like a huge over reaction to me. Easily prevented in future, lock your door.

redexpat · 07/12/2018 14:04

Crikey. When I'd had ds and the cards and presents were arriving the postman knocked, walked in and handed the pile to me on the sofa. Having said that everyone does in rural Denmark.