t-bar shoes when lashing down

[vandrew4]

Why are girls put in T-bar shoes in the pouring down rain?
Looking around today, every single girl bar one going into school was wearing T-bars.
every single boy was of course wearing proper shoes without great big holes on the top of them,
every single mother was wearing boots or full shoes.
Why do they think it's OK for girls to get wet / cold feet?

PLUS SHE WEARS WELLIES TO WALK TO SCHOOL AND AT PLAYTIME!

Honestly I don’t know why people think I’m lying about it. We trailed shops for hours to find a pair that fit her. I wanted practical shoes as much as anyone. I couldn’t find any to fit her!! Why would I make that up?!

My tiny DD has very narrow feet and at the start of reception the only shoes that weren't hanging off her were T bar shoes.

Now the weather is more rain then not I've bought her some calf length boots. I no her feet are slipping about in them despite the size being snug but I don't have much choice.

I can only do this because her school is relaxed about footwear. They don't wear pumps as they have free access in and out all day. They have 60 kids in one big classroom though so changing in and out of wellies causes chaos.

My DD will absolutely not wear trousers because she thinks she will be laughed at for looking like a boy but she is adamant so I can see how parents haven't the time to argue over t bar shoes.

Jesus - Soy you dont happen to have CCTV of said event do you? The jury needs more evidence apparently.

I don't understand why parents would put boys or girls in unsuitable footwear. If there's no space for the wellies at school, change their shoes when you drop off, and keep the wellies with you until pick-up. Most 6 years old don't walk to school on their own

Our school don't let parents into the inner yard or into the cloakrooms, there are no storage facilities for wellies, and nowhere outside for them to sit and change shoes. Parents have complained about it for years (me included) and school simply say that the uniform requires sensible shoes which should be dry enough.

DD generally wears brogues in Spring/Autumn, calf length boots in Winter (which are allowed under trousers provided they are covered by trousers and not tucked in), and T-bars in Summer.

we have a description of them, but I won't put it here as it is un PC.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess it's something that alludes to the wearer being a lesbian? Or as one of the girls in DD's class (6/7yo) said about DD's brogues - "my mummy says they're dyke shoes."

The answer is to explore the world of shoes beyond the stranglehold of Clarks and Start-rite. German brands, for example - Elefanten etc. (The only problem may be getting 'uniform' colours)

At this time of year most primary schools in my area allow girls to wear black winter boots or, as previous posters have mentioned, the majority of sensible parents walk their children (both girls and boys) to school in Wellingtons and then change them into school shoes once they arrive. It’s been that way since I was at primary school in the 90s. This isn’t really an issue! And no one forces girls to have t-bar shoes, I’ve seen many lace up shoes or Velcro strap ones for girls available.

Honestly I don’t know why people think I’m lying about it. We trailed shops for hours to find a pair that fit her. I wanted practical shoes as much as anyone. I couldn’t find any to fit her!! Why would I make that up?!

Soy, I believe you. DD was a D width fitting for ages when she was younger, I couldn't get her any walking shoes until she was nearly 2yo as there were no first shoes small enough or think enough to fit her. She got a pair of 2D cruisers a few weeks before her 2nd birthday and even then needed insoles to make them fit. Even now at 7yo she's only a size 8E (her 5yo brother has overtaken her and is a 10G).

Next have brogues for girls, both patent and leather.

My local shoe shops are a bit crap in what they stock. DD needs E or narrow F, nowhere even has E in stock, let alone F. No independents left, recently expired one had limited stock.

No keen on online shopping for shoes as DD is as yet unhelpful on assessing fit (she's 3) - if it's pink or shiny it fits until it has been worn outside them it hurts. If it's not pink or shiny it doesn't fit!

Mississippilessly I know! I definitely feel like I’m on trial .
If I really cared so much what randoms on an anonymous forum thought of me, to the extent that I’d lie about shoes , id have said ‘you’re completely right, my 4 year old wears the most practical brogues in existence’. I was just stating why my DD wears T-bars, and what we’ve put in place to mitigate the ‘wet feet’ issue (wellies!)

Although expensive we have found doc martens are good, durable shoes and fairly fashionable at schools around here. Probably not great for really narrow feet.

I used to work in the children's section at Clarks. It isnt as easy as saying 'this shoe comes in this size so it will fit'. Some kids have difficult to fit feet.

@EwItsAHooman

I believe you too. There is only one shop in my smallish city that has staff to fit shoes on children and the selection of girl’s school shoes is pretty limited.

Mississippilessly youngest DD is a toe-scruncher, she's a bloody nightmare to fit

We walk to school.

I found a pair of suitable shoes for DS within 5 minutes of looking.

Finding suitable shoes for DD takes much longer, and it's easier to look online now because she doesn't like looking in the 'boys' section in real shops.

Plus it's not just about being waterproof, it's about having soles that can handle walking to school every day.

Yes she could wear wellies, but I'd rather have a pair of shoes that were actually fit for purpose. And it does help if she likes them, even if sometimes it takes a bit of subtle persuasion.

I'm going to go out on a limb and guess it's something that alludes to the wearer being a lesbian? Or as one of the girls in DD's class (6/7yo) said about DD's brogues - "my mummy says they're dyke shoes."

That is awful such blatant stereotyping and prejudice. To be honest that is something that I probably would raise with the class teacher.

I remember trying on all the shoes when I was a child, as they tried to find shoes that fit my narrow feet. As an adult I like to wear brogues. There they are, in the shops, and online. I try on about a dozen that don't fit for every pair that does. Just because they are in the shops, doesn't mean they will fit me. So can we stop with the judgy attitudes and disbelieving faces, why would people be bothering to come on a thread and lie about shoes? Many girls (and boys too) can't find the shoes they want in their size. Shoe sellers need to wake up and start offering what people need. In all the sizes, and all the width fittings.

To be honest that is something that I probably would raise with the class teacher.

Oh trust me, that was a phone call I made as soon as we got home and DD told me.

@SoyDora here

Thank you Elderflower14. Unfortunately they were ruled out when we were buying shoes as she can’t tie her shoelaces herself yet (she’s in reception). Maybe next year!

DD wears ankle boots, she seems to have started a bit of trend for them in her class. We've previously bought them in Clarks but I recently discovered John Lewis do virtually identical ones for about £20 less, so we'll go there in future.

Limited range of alternative choices in mainstream shops for girls, plus lots of schools where ankle boots are not allowed as part of school uniform, and the welly-swapping pain in the neck as well. Bit easier when they're slightly older and able to do shoelaces so brogues become an option but we're firmly in velcro country still here!

Mine are wearing ankle boots to school in this weather but our school has very relaxed attitudes to uniform (head's words were "long as it's sensible I do not care what they've got on their feet").

Because it's more important for girls to look cute than be suitably shod gor poor weather. Although I've noticed that closed shoes for girls have become more common in recent years so its certainly not impossible to find them.

I've often found it's my DD themselves who have insisted on these type of shoes – and me desperately trying to steer them away from them.

Though this year I did get some pretty girl shoes then came up high with great grips - youngest has manage to break them and she's now got ones with poor grip and fairly open on top because it’s what there was at short notice in her size at only local place I could get to selling shoes.

I will hopefully have bit of money after Christmas so can get better then but till then she’ll have to manage.