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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be on the floor devastated

281 replies

TheSheepofWallSt · 01/12/2018 20:57

That my only-just two year old has started to call me “mum” not “mummy”?

Happy to be handed a grip, because I’m ridiculously (very unusually for me) sad over this!

OP posts:
Sara107 · 02/12/2018 17:45

I was Mama or Mam and felt a bit sad when I became Mummy. Now I notice that I am becoming Mum...you don’t need to get a grip, grieve for the little things you lose along the way and let them go, and embrace the new things that arise. That’s life!

Missingstreetlife · 02/12/2018 17:45

Where is homeslice?

GerardButlersBird · 02/12/2018 17:46

YANBU to feel a bit sad. I’d obtain a grip re the devastation though or the rest of your parenting journey is likely to be more traumatic than you can manage. Also, get up off the floor.

00lili00 · 02/12/2018 17:47

The terrible angst of the middle class

IsSpringSprangedYet · 02/12/2018 17:47

OP my older two call me mum and the younger two call me mama (pronounced mum-a rather than Prince Charles ma-mar). And the youngest of those still calls me mummy sometimes. He is 6. There will still be lots of "mummy", don't worry.
And my dad hated "what?" when we were kids so we used pardon instead. I use what? when I'm in a shitty mood and am snapping at people, so i try and encourage the kids to use anything but that. And I hate haitch. We use serviettes AND paper towels.

Hope your mum's okay too. Poor kitty. Flowers

mumlost1940 · 02/12/2018 17:51

Cleopatra called her dead mother - "Mummy." HRH Prince Charles calls The Queen - "Mummy." She's still alive.

Wholovesorangesoda · 02/12/2018 17:52

My dd is 9 and calls me mummy or mumma usually. Sometimes mumma bear. Every now and then it will be mum, but not often.
She did go through a phase when she was only 2 or 3 of calling me mum and it was sad, so I can empathise there. It didn't last long though so I'm sure you will be mummy again before you know it.

MerdedeBrexit · 02/12/2018 17:53

According to Nancy Mitford, it is non-u to say "Pardon?" instead of "What?" No mention of how to address a parent!

Mysteries · 02/12/2018 17:53

Nancy Mitford would have approved of his 'what'. She and other upper class writers reckoned 'pardon' is for us plebs. But probably they'd say Mummy is upper class. I don't know if NM was having everyone on or if she really was looking down on us.

cherrybath · 02/12/2018 17:54

My youngest DD is nearly 33 and still calls me Mummy, though the other three call me by my name now. I'm starting to think that its about time to make the leap! None of them ever called me Mum, I didn't like it.

stressedtiredbuthappy · 02/12/2018 17:56

Don't worry, my 2yo has started to call me by my Christian name!

mummmy2017 · 02/12/2018 18:00

Mum, is just quicker too say, so they can beg or moan about something, it shows intelligence in your child.

minmooch · 02/12/2018 18:04

Yes YABU to be on the floor devastated. Saddened maybe but he will call you many things during his lifetime. No doubt this stage will not last and you will go on to hear him call you all sorts of names over the years 😁

As for the cat - age appropriate discussion on life and death. He will take his cue from you so be sad about the cat but not devastated.

Missingstreetlife · 02/12/2018 18:10

Don't lie to your child about death. Suggestion above will make him scared eveytime someone goes on holiday. Mog is good, and as others say a simple true explanation is best. Has the cat been to the vet, or is it dead already?
Let him cry, have a little ritual, do drawing and make up songs etc.
Sorry for your mum

lovetherisingsun · 02/12/2018 18:10

The terrible angst of the middle class

Grin
SixButterflies · 02/12/2018 18:12

My wife and I are Mummy and Mum respectively. It would be complicated if we became Mum and Mum. I don't like the idea of Mum X and Mum Y to differentiate either.
I can't imagine my wife being Mum and I'd hate to be Mummy.

ToftyAC · 02/12/2018 18:13

I feel your pain. My 4 yo calls me Mum most of the time, although he reverts to Mummy when he’s not feeling grand. However, my 16 yo has stopped calling me Mum and calls me by my first name. And I find that really quite saddening.

Cardiganqueen71 · 02/12/2018 18:15

“What” is what the upper classes and the educated say. “Pardon” is used by the same people who don’t know the difference between you and i, and always say “I”if another person is involved. Which is incorrect but they think it makes them sound posh! It actually does completely the opposite. And you aren’t “stood” anywhere. You are standing... if you are going to correct your child, at least know what you are doing!

elliejjtiny · 02/12/2018 18:17

It will be ok. He will probably go back to calling you mummy again soon. My 12 year old calls me mummy still and I will probably cry when he stops.

elbowlicker · 02/12/2018 18:18

All of mine still call me mummy. 8 year old asked if he could call me 'Mum', I said of course yes at school or in front of your friends but I love being called 'Mummy'. he still calls me mummy :) There is no reasoning with a two year old, just correct him when he says mum and he will surely cotton on. I remember calling my mum 'bum' on many occasions from the age of 12, she never noticed. I have told my children this story and they have said it a few times, much to my amusement. 2 year olds have no concept of anything, they are just mirrors of other people's comments. Keep correcting him and all will be good. x

EWAB · 02/12/2018 18:21

It is definitely ‘What’ in most contexts. Pardon implies you have done something wrong.

Cindefuckingrella · 02/12/2018 18:21

I get where you’re coming from. I make my 7 yo call me mummySmile

Katherine2626 · 02/12/2018 18:23

Devastation is when your entire family get obliterated in an air attack, or you are bankrupt and lose your home, or you get a terrible diagnosis after medical tests. It is not one letter left off a word, whoever is saying it. Please be grateful that your child can speak!

BumDisease · 02/12/2018 18:25

Is calling your mum by her name actually something people do? Because I'm pretty sure that my mum wouldn't hesitate to backhand 33 year old me if I called her by name...

Jaxhog · 02/12/2018 18:34

can only assume when he’s at nursery, the toddlers I see at drop off and pick up, are actually secret teenagers

I had to laugh at this! We've teased my DN for calling his Mum 'Mommi' (in a Notts accent). He's half chinese and it just sounded so cute!

My little Bro went through a (very long) 'why' stage. This was his reply of choice to any and all questions. Maybe he also had teenagers at his nursery?