My sister has been signed off work with depression for about three years now and lives with her fiancé who financially supports them both and seems happy to do that (I think she gets an allowance as well). When she was first signed off she did a lot of CBT and seemed to be really positive for a while, started studying and appeared to have plans to work in the future or start a business. But all this time later she seems to have just come to a standstill, she says she won't be doing anything towards her OU degree until after the wedding which is in July and which seems to be the only thing filling her time as far as I can see.
I've genuinely tried to be supportive and I don't doubt that she has issues, but it just seems like she's given up. Recently I said to her that she needs to start with something small and build her confidence from there but she replied that her depression is a fundamental part of her and she can't handle everyday normal life, it overwhelms her and it always has done. Her fiancé is the "only one who has ever truly listened...not tried to belittle or normalise it".
So basically my AIBU is, am I completely out of order suggesting/ thinking that she needs more in her life than just being at home and this can't be helping her anxiety and depression in the long term? Either way I can't get her to see that but just wanted to get other perspectives. Mental health stuff is really hard and I've suffered with it myself, I definitely relate to feeling overwhelmed but it feels like she believes the way she feels is almost uniquely bad? Or am I just not being understanding enough that this is just the way she is permanently? It's her life I know but I just feel sad for her, she's not even 30 and doesn't seem to want to do anything.