RANT lazy to for owning a dishwasher - MIL

[AiryFairyUnicornRainbow]

After years of saving, we finally re-did our kitchen 3 months ago. It didnt come easy, we had saved for a long time and inherited the old one 20+ years ago with the house)

Really proud of ourselves, and the first time the ILs came round, MIL was making comments about the dishwasher, and how it is lazy to own one. (We had never had one in our lives, but SHE has, she had one in her last house before she moved last year). Every time she visits she makes at least one comment

Lazy? I work 50+ hours a week and DH often much more.

She has been round this morning (and is still here) and whilst FIL is talking about other stuff, she is using her visiting time to belittle me (not us) about owning a dishwasher again

I'm currently sitting in the bedroom because to be honest I dont know what her problem is - and it is the least interesting topic in the fucking world

I wish she would fuck off, as I have got stuff to do, ironing etc, but I cannot face this total bollocks once again

She's probably missing hers and taking it out on you. Just smile sympathetically next time she says it, give a little head tilt of concern and say 'you wish you still had one don't you?'

@RangeRider - that's perfect

Send her a few dishwasher brochures and Which reviews etc. Tell her she sounded like she wanted one again so you thought you'd help with suggestions. When you visit her start a discussion about where a dishwasher could go in her kitchen. When she starts the lazy comments launch into a monologue about how great it is (preferably with minute detail about exactly how to stack it, how everything comes out, whether cutlery should be put upside down etc etc). Smile sweetly. Tinkly little laugh.

"I do wish you would stop going on about this MIL... we bought a dishwasher for environmental reasons because they use a lot less water and energy than washing up by hand".

It says more about her that she thinks people are supposed to actually wash dishes.

Save all your washing up for her visit and hand her the rubber gloves and bottle of fairy as she walks in. Put your feet up and watch her wash up.

She's obviously jealous, we redecorated our whole house top to bottom new furnitures etc and my MIL couldn't even bring her self to say she liked the paint on the walls😂 the only thing she said was that her bed was bigger than ours ! Still to this day I laugh with SIL at her

My mum has that hair shirt mentality.

She will wash up (badly) when she comes to our house rather than just stick things in the dish washer. She would peg out washing all year round rather than tumble dry it.

I am the complete opposite.

My DM was a bit sniffy about us getting one. She thinks they’re unnecessary and expensive to run (I don’t think they are these days) but we had a tiny kitchen that cluttered easily, and a baby that never napped or slept. I was sick of walking into a kitchen full of dirty pots we hadn’t the time or energy to wash so we bought one and it was a life changer, my mental health improved immensely.

Other things she thinks are unnecessary are tumble driers, stretchy sheets (hers are flat, and her bed is made with hospital corners), duvets (she loves blankets) and Wi-Fi. She has Wi-Fi but barely uses it.

How old is she??? Sound like she's out of the ice age!

Because your son has never been great at washing up and they are cheaper than a divorce lawyer.

A colleague once told me I was lazy for not making my own baked beans...

I said perhaps but then so was she for not washing her machine in a tub with her hands and putting it through a mangle.

I spend my time in the way I choose and am grateful to live in a time where housework can take a lot less time than a century ago.

This is a generational thing, I think. But hey, who cares. It's none of her business. Laugh it off. Show her the door and limit her coming back.

She’s jealous.

I would call her out on it and say why do you own one then? Don't be lazy now, wash your dishes by hand and your clothes while you're at it.

Agree with her.

You're so lazy, you use a vacuum cleaner instead of taking up rugs and beating them outside and sweeping the floors.

You're that bone idle, you use a mop instead of going down on your hands and knees and scrubbing the floor.

Instead of getting coal in and lighting fires, you've got central heating.

You're so work-shy, you've been known to use oven chips instead of peeling, chipping and deep frying spuds.

You've even been known to order takeaways instead of hauling shopping home and cooking from scratch.

Embellish as appropriate. Make outlandish claims about how lazy you are until she tells you to stop being so ridiculous.

She sounds jealous.

wish i had a dishwasher used to have one a small table top one but when i moved in with partner no room so had to sell mine enjoy your kitchen and dishwasher and knickers to her

Every time she says it holler "Hey, DH, your mother is calling you lazy for having a dishwasher." Then watch her backtrack.

This is a generational thing, I think

Seriously? My Mum is 74, my Aunt is 90. They both think I’m crazy not having one! 😂

Clowns & FuzzyWuzzy No, I’ve had various ones, plenty of new ones too (I travelled for work for a long time 4-6 months in each place), good brands also (including a Miele, which I had high hopes for). I guess I’m just very sensitive to the smell/taste. A couple of months ago I was at a friends and asked if her DW was broken, she said yes, but was confused at what made me ask. When I said it was because I know how much she loves it so it was the only explanation why the mugs had been washed by hand. She laughed...then was worried they tasted of dishwashing liquid, I said no, the exact opposite, they don’t taste like dishwasher washed mugs.

IF I get one when I do the kitchen it’ll be a Neff slimline (it’s a stupid shape kitchen and no room for a full one). Please tell me good things about them. I WANT to love it —but we will fall out if it ru8ns my glasses etc). What I REALLY need is a cook who is happy to cook and hand wash dishes 😊

I'd just laugh in her face and let her know you think she's being ridiculous. Be breezy.

Or tell her that by her thinking washing machines are also for the lazy so she should take her laundry down to the river and bash the knicker gussets with a rock.

At the end of our days on this planet, no one will be rewarding us with a medal for being the biggest martyr to the washing up.

ILoveTrees we have a Bosch slimline, as we had a tiny space in a previous house. We’ve room for a big one now but we still have the slimline and most days we only need to do one load (2 adults, 2 young DC), sometimes two loads if there’s been a more elaborate tea or some baking. It works wonderfully.

We also had a Bosch slimline in last house and no issues (aside from when I put my belovedly tacky Heartbeat mug in there without thinking and Claude Greengrass's face half peeled off ). We have a full-size Bosch in this house and no weird smells or tastes (and I'm pregnant so super-sensitivity to smells and tastes is my super power at the moment).

Honestly, we lasted almost a year in new house without putting a dishwasher in and we should have done it months earlier as it's really life-changing. I hate piling stuff up on the side, having to wash stuff the minute you've used it when you'd rather be sitting on the sofa digesting your meal, the silent battle of wills as to whose turn it is to do the washing up, stuff sitting drying on the side or having to dry stuff with a tea towel that goes all limp and horrid after wiping about three things, having to leave things to soak cos food has got baked on... shudder. I will never be without one again!

Tell her that the dishwasher gives you and her son more time to explore your passions. Then wink at her.

She's an idiot

Dishwashers are very handy, why waste an hour washing dishes tediously by hand if you can chuck them all in and press a button and spend your precious time elsewhere.

She mustn't have much else to do.

For example I had a friend who worked 20 hours a week and used to say having a dishwasher was lazy yes it would be lazy if you were at home all day everyday

Tell her you’re sending your ironing out. She’ll lose her SHIT!!