RANT lazy to for owning a dishwasher - MIL

[AiryFairyUnicornRainbow]

After years of saving, we finally re-did our kitchen 3 months ago. It didnt come easy, we had saved for a long time and inherited the old one 20+ years ago with the house)

Really proud of ourselves, and the first time the ILs came round, MIL was making comments about the dishwasher, and how it is lazy to own one. (We had never had one in our lives, but SHE has, she had one in her last house before she moved last year). Every time she visits she makes at least one comment

Lazy? I work 50+ hours a week and DH often much more.

She has been round this morning (and is still here) and whilst FIL is talking about other stuff, she is using her visiting time to belittle me (not us) about owning a dishwasher again

I'm currently sitting in the bedroom because to be honest I dont know what her problem is - and it is the least interesting topic in the fucking world

I wish she would fuck off, as I have got stuff to do, ironing etc, but I cannot face this total bollocks once again

She’s out of line but tbh I can never understand why people use up so much energy getting worked up about stuff like this.

It’s a dishwasher. She’s said her piece, I’d just say something along the lines of “life’s too short to care about washing the dishes by hand, but if you’re so hell bent on doing it then the washing up liquid is that way,”

I can only assume that when people take this stuff so very much to heart they’re not comfortable with their decision themselves. Otherwise they wouldn’t give a shit. Surely?

Sitting in the bedroom is a way ott reaction as well.

I used to cook everything from scratch including things like my own pasta. Now I have health problems which mean that sometimes I just don’t have the stamina to do so. So now I sometimes stick a pizza in the oven or make sauce from a packet. Couldn’t give two shits if someone thought that was lazy. And if/when my health improves I may still cut corners because frankly life’s to short sometimes.

'I have better things to do with my time than wash dishes. However, you obviously don't, so feel free to come round and do ours.'

Also my mum has two dishwashers That would make your MIL's head spin.

Buy her a mangle for Christmas hahahaha

Tbh I never normally get worked up over this kind of stuff, but it is literally every single time she visits, since the kitchen was done.

Every time. Fair enough MIL you have said your piece several times now.

I never say anything I just don't think it is worth arguing about (not very confrontational) but it is putting me off of having her in our house as it is the same every time

Shes gone now - and breathe

"Lazy? Why yes. Yes I am and it's bloody lovely. I don't why I waited so long. You should get one." Said with a big, self-satisfied smile.

She is envious that you have a dishwasher and now she has moved she doesn’t have one anymore. Just turn it back on her and say “you sound jealous” whenever she brings it up

I have the washing machine, tumble dryer and dishwasher going. Happy to be 'lazy'. It's 2018, these appliances are hardly out of place.

Just say ‘this again, jeez you really are jealous aren’t you?’ I think shenis, she hasn’t got one anymore and gets riled that you do. Continually make out she’s jealous and sge’ll Stop or say ‘yes I know it’s lazy blah blah...can you change the record as this one is dead boring. If you don’t like it then don’t come round!’

I sympathise OP. My MIL thinks dishwashers are the work of the devil. She washes everything before it goes in, then cuts a dishwasher tablet in half, then puts its on a quick wash. So she wastes time, water AND energy.

You have to stand up to these people. Next time she mentions it look at your watch, laugh and say, "Ooh it's taken you 10 minutes to mention the dishwasher today." Do it next time, and the next time. Make a joke of how boring and predictable she is being.

I'd ask her why she keeps going on about it. That's very weird!

Life's too fucking short to wash dishes, I love my dishwasher.

I see that you don't like arguing, but it wouldn't be arguing to say calmly but firmly next time she mentions it; "Why do you have a problem with this, after all you had a dishwasher in your previous house?"

Cost of using the dishwasher VS washing by hand, I think a dishwasher uses less water, is so much more hygienic. My mother used to say that to me - until she saw how much I needed it with two children.

She's just jealous. She used to have one but hasn't got one now. You've got better things to do with your time than hand wash dishes! ( How many years of our life is spent standing at the sink and doing the washing up? )

Omg, we recently got a dishawasher when we moved house.

I don’t care if it makes me the worlds laziest person, I LOVE my dishwasher and I would not be without one ever again.

I’d say that to anyone who called me lazy about it as well. I have no idea how I lived without one till now, I’m so happy to own one now woohooo.

Agree she sounds jealous.

Also can see why this would wind you up. Never the right thing to critique your DIL or MIL's HH management choices, unless asked to.

My DM professes to be absolutely unable to help with clearing up after mealtimes because we have a dishwasher and it is far too complicated for her to master. We have had it for 20 years.

Maybe she's missing her old dishwasher and misery loves company?

She is being rude to keep criticising you for something so I think it’s fine to be direct back.

Tell her you're thinking of getting another one (that'll wind her up!) One to store the clean dishes in and one to do the current load - I would if I had the space for a second one.

'Owning a dishwasher gives me more time to darn DH's socks, stir the sheets in the bath, warm the iron on the fire and scrub the coal scuttle. It's quite time consuming living in the early C20th, don't you agree MIL?'

I don't know what I'd do without mine, and I'm a SAHM so if I worked long hours it would be a necessity!! What a two faced woman, since she has one. Take no notice.

Tell her you're thinking of getting another one (that'll wind her up!) One to store the clean dishes in and one to do the current load - I would if I had the space for a second one

Totally going to do this lol. I was listening to something on the radio about that very topic a few months ago, and was surprised how many people do own two

No different than owning a washing machine. Personally I find them a faff, quicker to hand wash.

Lazy would be not washing the dishes at all or paying someone to do it.

Maybe buy her a Victorian iron to heat on a range to go with the mangle, and perhaps suggest space saving by doing away with fridge/washing machine etc and just keeping things outside or a daily walk to the shops. It could also be beneficial to dig a well somewhere so that she can stop paying for running water, ditch the boiler and bath once a week in a tin tub. All involve a suitable amount of work I should think! Hehe! Joking obviously, but it's a petty thing to go on about. Maybe she's not well. Chin up OP, she will go home soon!

Is she one of these that runs around after her husband, and expects you to do the same for her precious son?