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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child didn’t have lunch at school

199 replies

Purpletigers · 23/11/2018 19:59

Child doesn’t have a lunch with them at school and doesn’t inform the teacher before lunchtime or the supervisor at lunchtime. Parent phones the school after pick up to complain that their child didn’t have anything to eat . The phone call is the first time the class teacher is aware of the situation . Who is at fault ?

OP posts:
Banana770 · 23/11/2018 20:10

At 8 I’d say the parent and child are at fault rather than the school. Unless there’s SEN I think 8 is old enough for the child to know they need to tell teacher or TA if they’ve forgotten their lunch surely?

Original poster
Purpletigers · 23/11/2018 20:11

Teacher wasn’t present in the room at lunchtime as had marking and photocopying to do .

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 23/11/2018 20:12

Ok.
At my school:
Definitely not the teachers fault, they have nothing to do with lunch time.
8 is possibly too young to have the confidence to speak up.

How does it work though? at our school, when the register is called, the 8 year olds have to say whether they're having school dinner (and red, green, or yellow) or whether they're having pack lunch.
What did the child say and what were they supposed to have?

Not enough info yet op.

Tartpop · 23/11/2018 20:12

I think all 3 parties are to blame. More so the parent for not arranging lunch (if that is the case)

GloomyMonday · 23/11/2018 20:12

Unusual for an 8yo not to speak up. We totally trust Y4 children at our school to go in from the playground when their class is called in for lunch, and I doubt anyone would notice if one didn't. The dinner hall is packed and noisy, several classes eating at once, no register taken.

sonandhelpneeded · 23/11/2018 20:13

Child's 8 capable of saying I've got no lunch! Presumably they're also alive having missed one meal?

Non issue!

hewhinessoshewines · 23/11/2018 20:14

Do the school not do a check of who is having what first thing

greencatbluecat · 23/11/2018 20:15

I once accidentally took my DD's packed lunch to work with me. She was also about 8. I phoned childminder who arranged with the school that DD would have a school lunch. Unfortunately, the school or childminder forgot to tell DD, and DD was too shy to pipe up. So she had no lunch that day. Nothing much anyone can do - everyone tried but it didn't quite work out. DD survived.

TheBigBangRocks · 23/11/2018 20:15

Parent in the main for sending no lunch. I'd like to think a member of staff would have noticed he had no lunch in front of him though.

RedDwarves · 23/11/2018 20:15

Parent is completely at fault.

ZigZagIntoTheBlue · 23/11/2018 20:16

My 8 year old has to say what kind of lunch he's having during the register "Yes Mrs xxx I'm having a school dinner today"

SnuggyBuggy · 23/11/2018 20:16

You need to teach your child what to do in this situation in future. Wouldn't they just give a school dinner and you owe them money?

ilovesooty · 23/11/2018 20:16

Cherries if the teacher is on their own lunch break why should they be noticing whether the children are eating?

Original poster
Purpletigers · 23/11/2018 20:16

When the register is called in the morning the child says if they’re having lunch or school dinner . Child said lunch . Teacher assumed the child had a lunch with them and it had been put on the shelf with he others.
Child is not at all shy and is very vocal at all times .

OP posts:
Nothisispatrick · 23/11/2018 20:16

Parent is at fault, ideally someone would’ve noticed or child would’ve told someone, but ultimately parent’s fault.

The school I work in teachers also get a lunch break when children are at lunch and eat in the staff room. The head actively encourages them to come and do this and eat together. Don’t see how the teacher can notice when they are also having their lunch.

GloomyMonday · 23/11/2018 20:16

"Do the school not do a check of who is having what first thing"

Probably. But if he said 'sandwiches' they wouldn't have asked to physically see them.

Cuzcothellama · 23/11/2018 20:16

At my child's primary, if a pupil forgets their packed lunch, then they get a school lunch and the parent is charged for it. I'd want to know why wasn't this done? It surely isn't difficult for a lunchtime supervisor to notice that a child isn't eating and sort it out.

Shannaratiger · 23/11/2018 20:16

As a lunchtime supervisor in our school we would be at fault for not noticing, child should have said when asked dinners or packed lunch and parent should have said he needs school lunch.

BertrandRussell · 23/11/2018 20:17

Parent and child.

GloomyMonday · 23/11/2018 20:17

" I'd like to think a member of staff would have noticed he had no lunch in front of him though."

Probably didn't even go into the dinner hall.

firsttimebabybirther · 23/11/2018 20:18

Bit of a mis-hap, childs life won't end because of one missed lunch. I do think it's maybe a little strange that the school don't have any system set up for finding out what each child is doing for lunch that day.

PotteryGirl · 23/11/2018 20:18

I run our Junior School lunchtime. If a child comes to me and says they've forgotten their lunchbox (it happens) then they get a cooked dinner and the parents are charged. No child ever misses eating..we have class lists, we know who's having dinner and we know who's having packed lunch...I know what they eat and what they leave. As a team we're on it. (200+ children).
The school should know this has happened so it doesn't happen again..

maddiemookins16mum · 23/11/2018 20:18

Why does someone have to be ‘at fault’, parent, teacher or otherwise.
I feel for the child but honestly, they won’t be about to collapse.

NailsNeedDoing · 23/11/2018 20:18

Why won't you answer the question about whether a lunch was ordered and paid for or not? It's relevant. If a lunch hasn't been ordered for children at our school, then it's assumed that they will have a packed lunch. If they don't, then that's the parents fault.

If a child told us they didn't have anything for lunch then they would be given something after all the ordered lunches had been done. We would notice automatically in KS1, but by age 8 it could go unnoticed if the child doesn't say anything.

GloomyMonday · 23/11/2018 20:18

"At my child's primary, if a pupil forgets their packed lunch, then they get a school lunch and the parent is charged for it. I'd want to know why wasn't this done?"

Because nobody knew he hadn't got his lunch.