Argh! I just told DH I didn't want his gift

[GoatFinger]

I don't know how rude it was.
I was presented with a gift from DH and I just stood looking at it before asking why he had bought it.
It's more like a gift for him. I don't want it. So I said I didn't want it and questioned why he'd bought it. It was supposed to be my Xmas present.

I’ve told dh never to buy me gadgets after he bought me a camera a few years ago which I never used - we use our phones and he has a digital SLR we use occasionally.
I usually accept gracefully then have a word after. It’s a shame as he used to be so good at gift buying but as he’s got busier he tends to buy shite.
Last bday I didn’t really get a proper present but we had an amazing holiday and had a fab day out so I said not to worry.

Nanny0gg
The Thought only counts if there actually is any

😍😍😍
Yes

A few years I got myself a Kindle which I was always raving about to DH as he knows I hate the clutter of fiction books, so what did he buy me - the trilogy of 50 shades of paperback books which he had obviously got cheap, my face must have been a picture when I opened it. The books were rubbish anyway, they went into the charity book bank a few weeks after Christmas.

Can it be that he saw the item as a Black Friday special and couldn’t resist the discounted price? Quite usual for many people to buy stuff they don’t need because it is a bargain

Yep I agree it was a present for himself. He'd already got himself expensive headphones so thought he could palm this other gift to himself off on you and still get to use it.

I wish I'd been as blunt as you tbh. My only present from my stbxh many years ago for Christmas was the (this shows how many years ago it was) stacking hi-fi system he'd really wanted to buy and I'd vetoed because we couldn't afford the re-payments (bought on credit). So he bought it anyway and presented it to me and said as I unwrapped it in front of his family it's more of a house present really! Wish I'd told him to fuck off and take it back to the shop which is what I wanted to do but didn't want to show up my then new husband in front of his family.

When sat navs first came out, I bought DH one, wrapped it and hid it away ready for Christmas. Only for him to spend the next few hours telling me what a silly gimmick sat navs were and you can't beat a decent road atlas. Fast forward a few years, and the poor man can't drive anywhere without his beloved sat nav.

I'm not sure I'd want a bluetooth speaker though, I prefer headphones.

Why do so many men do this shit? My dh always goes on about how he doesn't know what to get me, how he walked around for hours trying to find me something.
I am not hard to buy for. Jewellery, candles, perfume, fancy smellies, Sephora gift card, chocolate, handbags. One year he bought me a selection of nuts. Because he was trying to be healthy. I made him go back and swap it for chocolate nuts.

He was being very thoughtful and considerate towards you and the fact that it's something he loves and you can't stand is entirely co-incidental.

You now owe him big-time and you need to repay his kindness.

Give him a sparkly pink bowling ball.
With the holes cut to fit your fingers.
With your name engraved on it.
And then look visibly deeply hurt if he should happen to be less than 100% delighted with it.

I might have got this idea from a 'documentary' I saw a while ago....

I asked my husband to please get me something impractical one year (after years of useful gifts like hoovers!). He gave me a lovely tennis racket and was very please with it. I don't play tennis!

Well, to be fair to him, you can't get much more impractical than that, then

It was a completely thoughtless gift. He liked the look of it so bought it, with no thought as to whether you'd actually want it or like it OP.
Tell him as he likes it so much you'll swap it for his headphones.
YANBU!

Tell him he has plenty of time before christmas to exchange them for wireless headphones.

He's a good husband. I hope he's not weeping into his numerous beers being consumed as we speak.
He doesn't appear distressed by my bluntness.

I dread Christmas presents from DH. Every year he says he doesn't know what to get me. Every year I say 'oh that's easy... a nice pair of good quality gold earrings because I'm allergic to all other metals'.

Every year he gets me at least two pairs of nasty rhodium plated things and he gets upset that I don't look happy.

We've only had this conversation for the last 38 years. I think I've finally realised that he doesn't actually listen when I speak.

YANBU

It's a shit present.

I got a toilet seat from XH one Christmas. Not even joking

Could be worse. I once got the Readers Digest DIY manual for Christmas. At least it was wrapped up and given on Christmas day. But still.

thenightsky After 38 years I think this might be the year to reply 'nothing DH, I'm going to choose a pair of earrings myself and we'll call that your gift to me'.

Approaching the last Christmas I spent with an ex, he went on and on about the great present he was getting me - how it was the best thing ever etc etc.
He really guilt-tripped me into spending more on his gifts than I wanted to as his was "so brilliant" (bad relationship that I felt trapped in for various reasons).
Christmas morning I was presented with a kids DVD (Over The Hedge) and a NEWSPAPER CUTOUT of a laptop....apparently it was "on order". Obviously that was bullshit as it never materialised!

I’d been going out with my now DH, for about 3 months and he bought me a 5 pack of period pants from Marks and Spencer’s I have no idea why?! He said he “thought I’d like them”.

One of my boyfriends got me an origami set once 😆

@19lottie82

😂😂 I'd have been thrilled with period pants. I can't get over how great they are. Better than sexy lingerie that rides up your butt

Yep - rude

A few years ago I was reading the book review pages in the Guardian and said to DH "I really don't want to read The Boy in the Striped Pajamas". He bought it for me for Christmas. When asked did he remember my telling him I didn't want to read it, and us having a conversation about why I did not want to read it, he said "yes, but I couldn't think of any other books you had mentioned and I knew you wanted a book".

He gave it to you so he could start to use it straight away.

Return it and exchange it for wireless headphones. Usually 14 days to return.

mostdays That sounds scarily similar to my earlier earring post. They listen, but they don't listen

@BombBiggleton

That's up there with the surprise weekends away ( where the organiser basically uses joint money to go somewhere they want to without the partner having a chance to object.)

Another is tickets to see a show or a gig, that's totally impractical to get to, will incur extra expense that you will have to pay for yourself (travel tickets, hotel etc) and is as much for the ' giver' as for the ' receiver.')

This is one of my pet hates. Someone buying tickets to a show or a concert. A close family member of my friend, got her a ticket for something for a 'big' birthday some years ago. Just her, just one ticket!

It was SIXTY miles from home, a 20 minute drive to the train station, and an hour and a half journey on the train. No train went straight there, so she had to change trains ... Also, it was not possible (because of where she lived, and what time it finished,) to get back that same night, so she would have had to get a hotel that cost £75-£90 for the night.

She sold the ticket on ebay. They never found out. She just poached a few pics of google (of the concert,) and pretended she took them.

DH is pretty average at buying me stuff too, and always gets the same stuff... a box of chocolates, a DVD, (that I ever asked for and didn't want,) a pair of socks, a CD (that I also never asked for and didn't want,) a paperback book, (that I never asked for and didn't want!) a puzzle book and pen, and a bottle of Liebfraumilch wine. Virtually the same bunch of gifts every time!

Then he says (grinning at me, with an excited tone in his voice,) 'you have something to eat, something to watch, something to wear, something to listen to, something to read, something to DO, and something to drink. He acts like he is the most clever, imaginative, amazing, gifted and talented man in the world, to have gotten such a vast array of gifts that will keep me so entertained!!! I find it so hard, every time, to look excited.

I know I should probably be more grateful, (and I'm sure some will say I should!) but it's rarely anything I really want. If I want something for myself, like a certain perfume, or piece of jewellery/earring etc, I just buy it myself.

Gotta love him, and he has so many good points, but this grates a bit sometimes if I am being honest...

Although reading some of the posts here, I could do a lot worse!