Spectacular Parent Fail- AIBU to ask you about yours?

[toothfairy73]

Just had a relaxing afternoon as my DD (6) has an after school activity today. Parked up outside the school early, have a leisurely moment, stroll up to pick her up; only to discover I'm half an hour late. They've tried calling my mobile (I left it at home), they've called work and my husband (who is going out of his mind with worry), I'm mortified.

DD happy; she got to go to after school club and eat pizza.

AIBU to ask you about your parent failures to make me feel better....?

I kept them off school on the wrong Monday for an inset day. Couldn't figure out why soft play was empty.

OOPS.

How did you manage to be 30 minutes late ?

Erm my 2yo ds is currently eating dinner in front of the tv as my throat hurts and I feel rubbish.

I turned up at 4:15; it finished at 3:45. I had to pick my other daughter up YESTERDAY at 4:15.... just had a bit of a senior moment

😂

I forgot it was non school uniform day
I forgot to show up and watch an after school concert which dd had a solo in
I forgot to bring harvest festival things in

The list goes on......

I had a rare night out on the tiles with mates, and got thoroughly pissed. Had a very bad hangover the next day. I had my MIL staying with me, and we went into town for lunch. I'm staring at the sushi cart, thinking, hmmmm, sushi. Then ' OH SHIT SUSHI, I WAS SUPPOSED TO DROP SUSHI INTO THE SCHOOL FOR COELIAC DAUGHTER FOR LUNCH' which was started about 20 minutes ago - thank goodness for DH, who rocketed out on his scooter, grabbed the sushi, got it to the daughter, and even covered for me to said daughter. . . . I was mortified though, I was on the Board of Governors and the Principal didn't let me live that one down after the school secretary who never misses a beat gleefully shared that one with him!

Kept dd home from primary on inset day.I live opposite the school and only realised it was the wrong day when I saw the children playing outside at break!!!!
I got her dressed, took her to school and confessed to my stupidity. Bet they had a chuckle in the staff room.

I used to have so many fluffy moments when mine were at first school. I was always always forgetting a non uniform day.

In the end I would leave a change of home clothes for each child in a bag in my boot. Problem solved!

sent DS to school on a training day. He had to sit in school office until I collected him (year 7) he was not impressed!

Not me but my husband keeps sending my son to school in the wrong shirt. It’s not even the right colour.

I have on at least 4 occasions sent DS into school wearing uniform on a non uniform day. As I'm pulling away I stop at the crossing and see all of the colourful children go past and swear like a navvy. Then race back to the school with hastily thrown together outfit/costume.

I'm going for number 5 tomorrow!

I just googled to see if the expression 'swear like a navvy' is offensive. It doesn't look like it is but I'm going to have to keep an eye on the thread. If I'm wrong I will certainly be corrected.

I once turned up at a child's birthday party with a present and card addressed to the wrong child. Only realised my mistake when I was hovering near the present table and thought 'oops that person's addressed their card to Amy rather than Emily, bet they'll be feeling pretty stupid...hang on, all these cards are addressed to Amy...'

I also completely forgot about stupid children in need or whatever it is tomorrow and will be spending this evening hastily gluing spots onto old t shirts .

DS had been off school ill for 3 days. The last day he was chirpy all afternoon and slept really well so I took him into school the next day.

50 minutes later I got called to pick him up as he was "really unwell" (it's just a bad cold according to Dr but he has struggled with it). He had the next 2 days off cos I was worried about sending him back too early again

Mixing up inset daus is perfectly normal. What's not normal is That Parent who refused to accept that we couldn't just take his PFB into school anyway and set her something to do while we had our training session.

Once sent DS to school with (what I thought were) foil-wrapped sandwiches. Later discovered said sandwiches in fridge; turns out I'd sent him with a giant block of cheddar wrapped in foil.

Brett Brilliant.

Omg that is hilarious Brett bet his face was a picture when he unwrapped that

Ah this is the sort of thread where people list things I do every day and present them as an epic parenting fail ( like having the tv on when eating dinner.)

We lived in an area notorious for horrendous snow when I was younger. School was in the next county. Dad drove me to the bus stop to wait for the bus
If I say the snow at this point was horizontal and the drifts were up to my waist, it wasn't exaggerating. We had to dig the door out with a shovel to get out
But he drove me still to the bus stop and I waited for 20 mins in this bastard snow before he finally conceded it probably wasn't coming

He also rang me to ask when my birthday is and how old I will be. I'm an only child...

Oh I've remembered more

Age 8. Trod on by a (very) large horse and complaining of the pain
Mum "it'll be fine"
3 days late "mum, it's a funny colour"
Mum "it'll be fine"
Another day later "mum? It's purple"
Mum "FFS, it's fine but we will go get it checked"
Fractured in several places

Age 18 I fell down the stairs and landed on my ankle and foot and heard it break. It was facing the wrong way
Mum "I don't think we really need bother the hospital"
Me and Dad in unison "WTF?!?!"

Oh and she taught me if I fell over to sing "pick yourself up, brush yourself down and start all over again"
Apparently the faces she got when I tripped, smashed my face into the pavement and stood up minus several teeth and a bloody nose and started singing were a picture

Fortunately, I discovered the cock up in time, whizzed down to the school to perform the sandwich swap. Gave the school secretary a laugh though.

Set out for my first solo trip to the supermarket with DS1. He was four weeks old. Got him in the car seat, put my bag in the car, shut and locked the car door ( this was before central locking). Went round to the driver’s side and tried to open the door. Locked. My keys are in my bag, in the locked car. As is my phone and house key. And my baby.

After much frantic panic, my neighbour called my DH at work and finally smashed the car window in just as DH pulled up. My son slept through the entire thing.

My Mum failed to provide a packed lunch for me when my junior school were off on a trip one day - it was a Monday so i had a week's dinner money but we were not let of the leash enough for me to go and buy anything. Fortunately my mates shared their lunch with me.

In a mad rush one morning, I grabbed both ds’s lunch boxes from the counter where dh had put them ready.

Then got a call from school at 12.30 to say the dc had been given a school dinner as the dc seemed to have brought empty lunch boxes

The receptionist was being nice to avoid embarrassing me I think because it was so much worse than empty boxes.

I’d made the dc’s their packed lunches and left them in the fridge. But had forgotten to clean out their character lunch bags from the day before and grabbed them thinking dh had put them ready.

So the dc had actually had warm, half wrapped sandwich crusts, empty yoghurt pots and crisp wrappers, a half empty pot of slimy old cucumber sticks and an apple core each