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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to wash 7yo's hair in a bowl instead of in the shower?

86 replies

WhereforeArtThouManatee · 11/11/2018 20:00

DS hates getting his hair washed. He showers fine, washes himself well, dries off. But doesn't shampoo his hair in the shower.

I wash it for him 1 - 2 times per week, he leans back over a bowl in the kitchen and I give it a quick shampoo. Takes 5 mins.

DP is going mad over this, says he's 7, he should be able to do this. I think it's not a big deal, i didn't grow up with a shower and we used to wash hair like this.

Who is being unreasonable?

OP posts:
OhComeOnRon · 11/11/2018 20:03

What is your sons issue with washing his hair?
Personally I agree with your husband, he's 7 and should be well able to wash his hair in the shower.

daisy877 · 11/11/2018 20:07

I agree with your husband !
He can't be washing his hair over a bowl all his life I would make him do it in the shower he will soon get used to it

Caprisunorange · 11/11/2018 20:09

I agree with your husband and I will say MY husband was still doing this at 20 (he did it himself, not his mum) his mum still does it at 75. It’s like something that harps back from ye olden days

melj1213 · 11/11/2018 20:17

I don't think you're being unreasonable to make sure it is washed but he is 7 and should be more than capable of washing his hair himself. I don't understand why he can't do it while he's already in the shower and why it needs to be a seperate activity.

My DD is 10 and has long, thick curly hair so she sometimes needs help rinsing her hair properly but she just gets out, wraps up in a towel and leans over the bath so I can use the shower head to fully rinse her hair out and then wrap it up so she can go and put on pjs before I brush and dry it for her.

Is it because he gets shampoo in his eyes? Doesn't rinse it properly? That's something that you can be teaching him to do while he's showering - show him how to tip his head back so the water runs away from his face, or even wear goggles; show him how to make sure it's fully rinsed out; make sure he's not using too much shampoo etc

Original poster
WhereforeArtThouManatee · 11/11/2018 20:36

Yes, very good - glad I asked you all!

It's the shampoo in eyes and not rinsing properly that seem to be the main issues. New project for this week: teach him how to do it properly.

OP posts:
Original poster
WhereforeArtThouManatee · 11/11/2018 20:38

Although I'm also annoyed that even though DP is the one who is bothered by this, seems like I'm the one who's going to have to do the teaching Confused DP just shouts and then DS gets in too much of a state to learn anything.

OP posts:
MsAwesomeDragon · 11/11/2018 20:40

Well my DD is 8 and doesn't even have showers because she hates them. She has baths and likes DH to wash her hair for her. She doesn't like me to do it because I try to get her doing more of it herself.

It won't be forever. I'm letting DD get away with it a bit longer because it's a job DH has to do rather than me. I don't think it's terrible to still help wash hair at 7, he's still pretty young imo, he'll get it eventually.

BackforGood · 11/11/2018 20:45

I think you are right.
Why does it annoy your dp so much ? Confused
I am many times your ds's age, and I would love having someone wash my hair for me every week. It's really relaxing. I love having my hair washed at the hairdressers too. Your ds probably likes the head massage side and is also maybe enjoying a little bit of 1:1 time with his Mum.
I can't see why on earth your dp would have an issue with that. He is only 7 for goodness sake - what is your dp's problem ??? Hmm

mikado1 · 11/11/2018 20:45

Why can't he wash his hair over a bowl if he wants to?? Though I can feel the neck pain from here, I'd rather lean forward. He won't get shampoo in his eyes, as you obviously know, if he'd look up. My ds got over it because of enforced showers after swimming.

Santaispolishinghissleigh · 11/11/2018 20:46

Maybe agree to a treat of washing at the sink like at the hairdressers now and again but shower the rest?

Thehop · 11/11/2018 20:47

This honestly wouldn’t bother me! Whatever gets the job done and Kees everyone happy is fine by me!

Believeitornot · 11/11/2018 20:48

I would and do wash my dcs hair when they shower. So why not do it forhim in the shower to actually teach him how to do it properly?

CardCardCard · 11/11/2018 20:49

This reply has been deleted

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RebelWitchFace · 11/11/2018 20:50

@CardCardCard he's frikking 7!! He has plenty more years of raising to do.

woodhill · 11/11/2018 20:51

What about in the bath?

OhComeOnRon · 11/11/2018 20:53

I could understand if he had long hair that was difficult to rinse (tho even then I'd be doing in to show them whilst they're actually in the shower)
But if he has short hair and his only issue is getting it in his eyes at 7 he does really need to get over it.

WheelchairWoes · 11/11/2018 20:53

I know a lot of people who wash their hair over a bowl in the sink. It's a throw back to the old days I think.

Ooplesandbanoonoos · 11/11/2018 20:54

7 is still quite young imo. Fine to help and do whatever works. Would he lie back in the bath or wear goggles for his eyes?

TheChippendenSpook · 11/11/2018 20:59

I wash my 7 year old's hair and I also washed his brother's when he was 7.

My eldest is 16 and I haven't been washing his hair for a good number of years so I don't think it's a problem to wash a seven year old's hair.

Romanmonkey · 11/11/2018 21:03

Really card? You don’t think that’s a slight overreaction?

CardCardCard · 11/11/2018 21:03

Jesus. 7? That’s old enough be able to wash your hair unless there are special needs.

Skang · 11/11/2018 21:04

I think this is a complete non issue and I've no idea why anyone cares.

My DD is 7 with bum length wavy, knotty hair and is nowhere near washing it herself.

Believeitornot · 11/11/2018 21:06

@CardCardCard

Rubbish. My dcs have thick curly hair. No way can they wash their hair properly.

Skang · 11/11/2018 21:06

And she doesn't have special fucking needs FFS. God, there are some idiots on here.

Believeitornot · 11/11/2018 21:06

Personally I think that those who throw around the “snowflake” insult are the most insecure, easily offended people that I know.