To ask...What do you mum's refer to your vaginas as to your little kids?!

[Zara87]

Not even sure this is allowed... but I have an almost 3yo who is now noticing and asking questions about how I wee without a willy!
He keeps saying stuff like "you do a wee out of your that bit" and pointing. I just want something to refer to it as, which doesn't sound ridiculous. I know it is called a vagina but i don't really want to call it that to him, I'm not sure why but it kind of sounds wrong at age 2. My mum used to call it 'a Mary' which i don't like!
Does anyone have any suggestions

We just used lady parts.

My daughters know they have a vulva, wee out of their urethra and have a vagina.

Why do they say wee? Please use the correct biological terms. They urinate.

I've used a mix of most of the words - vulva & urethra opening/hole (the latter more with kids a bit older than 3 while discussing anatomy and why wiping front to back is meant to help prevent infections and similar) to girl/women/gal bits or parts to one of my kids' favourites is just peehole. I explained to my curious youngest (my older son never asked) who quite liked saying penis that yes, he and his father and brother have a penis and the rest of the guy bits and sisters and I have gal bits and that's why I don't have a penis. He found that a satisfactory answer.

While I agree that body knowledge is important, with a 3-year-old, as long as it's pretty clear you're talking about the genital area (I don't get using cookie/flower/other nouns that can be entirely different things), I don't think it's that big of an issue.

TBH, it bothers me far less when people say wee than when they call the vulva a vagina. Calling the act of urination weeing is slang (like calling a person named Robert, Bob). Calling the vulva a vagina is simply wrong (like calling said Robert, Charles.

All those who don't use the proper words or at least teach the proper words, do your dc say ta, instead of thank you. If expectations re speech and vocabulary are low then neither will develop beyond average levels.

I beg to differ as mine knows how to spell sanctimonious

That’s disgusting, and I’m pretty sure you know I meant bedroom talk between consenting adults.
Geez. One flippant remark, and suddenly I’m a paedo.

6 years ago I had vulval cancer. I cringed when I had to tell people as I hated the word vulva but was taken aback by the amount of grown women who seemed to have no clue as to which part of me was being hacked away.

That was to woolyheads.

Why do they say wee? Please use the correct biological terms. They urinate.

Because it’s normal.
I had many years of having to talk about such stuff. If the person was ‘old’ I would say urinate (as well as using Mr/Mrs). If the person was not old I would use wee (along with Christian name). Periods rather than menstruation. Bum rather than buttocks etc.

One of my kids is an older teen. They regularly attend a hospital continence clinic who use wee/poo as standard terminology. The charts they need to fill out have columns labelled wee and poo. Unless you are talking with people of an age pretty much facing death it’s pretty standard otherwise it’s weird.

Front bottom for wee, back bottom for poo

Front bottom.

We use vagina and penis. I’m sure as they get older we’ll introduce vulva, urethra and other anatomically correct names. They’re not really old enough to understand that there’s different parts in detail. At home DD1 says ‘bits’ and we understand her but she knows if she talks to a trusted adult/doctor then to explain using the correct terms so she can be clear.

Please use the correct terms where possible. It really does help when trying to understand what a child is trying to tell you and you never know, that could be really important in the future.

Cookie.

We use 'bits' or 'front bottom' with our 3 year old. Only because she kept calling the whole undercarriage area her bum so we had to differentiate between front bottom and back bottom.

vagina.

I find it odd those saying they just don’t need to refer to it as anything. What about at bath time? My DD says foof, which I find not embarrassing, and not referring to anything else that might be confusing. Also find it’s something a teacher or other family members will be able to work out what she means, if she said for example “my foof hurts” if she had an infection or whatever. If your child told a teacher “that boy just touched my cookie” it might get ignored, which is serious.

Vulva = fanny
Penis = willy

I also think it’s ridiculous to insist on the “correct” word and use vagina incorrectly.

Cookie though... that takes the biscuit

As kids, we used the terms Fanny, or Minnie.

As an adult - I know it is the correct word, but even now I don't say the word 'Vagina' out loud. I dunno why...as an adult, I tend to use rather crude words...But then I am a crude kinda woman

I just can't seem to say Vagina. I dont know anyone else who does to be honest- other than the doctors lol

My 5 yo ds knows all the anatomically correct names for all the bits. They are just words and what he knows is factual. The important part is finding a way to discuss these things in a way you are comfortable with.

We use bottom (back) and gina (pronounced j-eye-na) for everything at the front. I’ve never told her she wees out of her vagina, but we use these terms mostly to instruct washing - wash your bottom and now your gina- she knows one is around the back and the other term refers to everything at the front.

I’m personally not fussed about using anatomically correct terms to a small child - as pointed out we use tummy, bum, wee etc. I also believe in the case of abuse that the professionals have many ways of understanding from a child what they are saying regardless of correct terms, and provided she can make herself clear then that’s also not a reason to teach the full anatomy. As and when she asks I’m happy to use correct anatomical terms but personally for three small girls I find the words we use are both generic and specific enough to serve their purpose

It was always front bottom and back bottom when I was growing up. Or 'nether regions'. 😂

It really doesnt matter much whether you use a cutey name or anatomical. You just need to be all comfortable with the word chosen. It helps if it something and older child could say to a doctor so that rules out some very silly ones. Its very strange we are all so precious about the word vulva, which is what it is. Perhaps little girls should grow up with a family name and an anatomical so they know the difference. If we feel coy, they will grow up with the same embarrassment. the Trouble is so many people use the word vagina that it prob is more socially acceptable at school although I don't like it as it refers only to the internal parts which children rarely need to talk about. Whatever you choose children will discuss it in the playground so maybe that will influence your choice. On a separate issue, all children should be taught their genital parts are private ( which brings up another nickname!)

Fanny

Willy is mr winkie, no idea why.

Always called them penis and vagina, (yeah, I know, it's vulva!). My son started saying willy when he went to school & my daughter shortened it to "gyna" but I was matter of fact about it, my son was 3 when my dd was born. They just accepted that's what those body parts were called and kept it moving.