To ask...What do you mum's refer to your vaginas as to your little kids?!

[Zara87]

Not even sure this is allowed... but I have an almost 3yo who is now noticing and asking questions about how I wee without a willy!
He keeps saying stuff like "you do a wee out of your that bit" and pointing. I just want something to refer to it as, which doesn't sound ridiculous. I know it is called a vagina but i don't really want to call it that to him, I'm not sure why but it kind of sounds wrong at age 2. My mum used to call it 'a Mary' which i don't like!
Does anyone have any suggestions

What the hell is going on with posters who have not been to the toilet with their children in the room. I find it physically impossible.

The other day I was on the loo for a number 2 and 3yo dd came in and said “is it out yet?”

I think it’s healthy!

Front bum and back bum. She's 4 and that'll do for now!!

I too would like to know how the hell anyone goes to the loo without being accompanied by small person.

Vagina "wipe your vagina". "Willy. Testicles". My mum could barely even call it a vagina without giggling when I was a kid. She can barely even say it now. Which really annoyed me, so it's proper names for me.

Sound of music quote made me laugh

Phrases we’ve said “watch out for my goat!” When passing a like minded friend.
“These engagement pains feel like im being knifed in the quiche!”

“My goats got a beard” “need to trim my goat” or “Fed my goat!” (that’s a rude one)

Also call it lady garden or jungle like “there’s a rumble in my jungle”

I’m awake at 5am because I’m poorly, this thread has cheered me up!

My dd is 7 and we use the word "flower" and yes she knows the correct anatomical terms but doesn't sound as harsh this way.

Ds is 15 and I'm not repeating what he calls his. Have heard many a conversation with him and his friends referring to their bits and it makes me shudder!

No subject off limits here, periods were spoken about very young etc so it's not about being prudish, I simply think some words are horrible and generally she doesn't need to use them correctly at this age.

Who are these people that have never had there children see them wee? What do you do when you're in public and need to the toilet? Leave them outside? If I so much as look at the toilet I get "Mummy, what are you doing"

My kids say willy and foofoo. It's not ideal and they know the correct words, but I just think they sound weird coming from young children. I know you're meant to tell them the correct words so that if anything utterly horrible happens to them, then can tell someone without any confusion as to which part of the body they're talking about.

As the mother of teenage boys I can categorically state that they were not confused or in the slightest bit fucked up by using the terms Winkle and LaLa to refer to theirs and my genitals. They also knew the correct words.

I have no idea what they call them now they are older and why would I know? But I bet it's not winkle and lala 

Another Mumsnet myth here - we say vulva. I do wish there was a more universally accepted equivalent to willy though. I don’t hate a problem with vagina to refer to whole area though - I think that’s a lost battle. The thing I felt quite strongly about is I didn’t want DS to just think girls/ women were missing a part.

Also completely baffled anyone manages to never let their kids see them wee. What do you do when out and about? Presumably you don’t leave your one year old outside the cubicle?

We use yoni, I know people think its weird but I Iike the positive meaning. I don't like the pet dog names like foofoo or Minnie. My daughter knows she has a wee wee door and a baby door in there (she came up with doors rather than openings). We will deal with vulva and all that jazz when she's a bit older.

I rarely ever wee out in public
7/10 I'd be with my partner so he would wait with the children.
Just like they've never seen him pee either

I just don't understand why people like to show how progressive they are by teaching their children to use vagina and penis for external genitalia when the former is just as incorrect as flower, front bottom etc. Or AIBU?!

Fwiw we have used "front bottom" with my 7 year old since she was a toddler, so I am not posting this from a self righteous perspective.

My 2 call it a “Bagynie”

My father is an obstetrician/gyenecologist - my "bits" were called their proper names. He had no cause to speak of my vagina when I was a young child so I never heard him speak of it. My brothers had penises, scrotums, and we did not use euphemisms.

It infuriates me that people are embarrassed to say vulva and use vagina to refer to the external parts of a female bottom area. It is lazy, and can be very confusing.

I don’t understand people not reading the very clearly written reasons for referring to body parts in this thread.

Mominatrix - I agree and I would have used vulva except it is so infrequently used. I thought that if she went to an adult (e.g at nursery) to complain of pain/soreness/itching of her vulva the they may not have understood or worse sniggered through embarrassment of the word. I didn't want her to be put off by such an experience and felt "front bottom" was adequate and left no room for ambiguity.

@poppylizzyrose get well soon!

I too am also shocked about the people who don't pee in front of their kids! I'm on my own with my 2 boys 6 days a week and we go out a lot, pretty sure it isn't socially acceptable to leave my 2yo and pushchair outside the toilets while I go and pee in peace .

We used to say gina pronounced like Gina Ford.

Cha-cha.

I call it a fanny or a foo, but they do know its proper name too

Willy, or girl willy. Both refer to the urethra in the context of urination. As you don’t see out of your vulva, bum or vagina why on earth would you use any of these?

Tuppence 

You don't see put of your vagina.
I told my son he has a silly for seeing, I see out of a hole.
I have another hole that he doesn't have, which is where the babies came out.
And another one for poo, just like him.
When he and his sister are washing in the bath we say 'wash your privates'.
If and when he asks what the 3 holes are called I'll tell him - urethra, vagina and anus.

Me and my friends randomely have always called it a quiche or goat...

I'll never be able to ask DP if he fancies quiche for tea again, now, and I'll snigger whenever I see quiche on a menu.

And I suppose that makes calling someone a "silly goat" really rather rude.

Peeing (obviously), not seeing.