Aibu to be upset- got a towel for my birthday.

[BirthdayTowel]

My p just gave me my birthday present.

1. A planner/diary thing. The one he gave me last year is still unused. I use google calendars.
2. A bath towel. ‘You’ve been using mine quite a lot so I thought you might want a new one’. We’ve been moving so I couldn’t find my nice normal one as I had packed it too well and was using an old thin stiff one.

I have bloody Pinterest. Most years he just picks something random from that. I even have a board called things I like - some costing a pound. It’s just the not giving a shit which is hurtful when he knows it’s important to me.

YANBU, that’s poor! I know some people are bad at presents but nobody has ever seriously though somebody wants a towel for their birthday.

I know how you feel. By the end of my marriage my ex had resorted to buying me a Fat Face bubble bath set. Is he good and kind in other ways and just shit at buying presents? If so, I’d let it go. Get him to take you out for a nice lunch. If it’s symptomatic of just not caring then that’s a different issue.

Ok the planner is poor but the towel actually shows some thought ( even if not the best as a birthday present). He noticed you weren’t using yours, ( or maybe he just wanted his back)I hope it was a decent towel.

But a towel isn't a present. It's a household item and no different to kitchen items, dusters etc.

It’s ok.
A while ago I was talking about being grown ups and getting proper linen that matches. It’s a good quality towel but it is a colour that does not match anything we have.

It’s better to not get anything I think, or at least ask if you are struggling. No pp, he is a good ‘provider’ but very selfish generally.

That's a shit present
He obviously doesn't think about what you want though because he's bought you another diary you won't use. Do you want to spend another year with someone this inconsiderate?

The towel seems a little passive aggressive.

I got nothing for my birthday this year. So DH will get the same for his.

To be fair to my DH, when he asked me what I'd like I said there was nothing I wanted and he surpassed himself this year by actually going out and getting cards, which is more than most years.

I feel for you but some blokes (yes!) have little or no idea about present giving. I too make a wish list which I leave lying around and it is ignored. In recent years I've chosen and bought/ordered my pressies and he is happy to give me the money for them.

It doesn't mean he doesn't love you!

A towel seems odd. A colleague at work was once given some Irish linen Christmas tea towels as a Christmas gift from boss. She was so offended she brought them in to work and put them in our kitchen area. She said, "I am not a kitchen maid"! I thought that was a bit out of order being as boss meant well (I got a teapot stand) so squirrelled them away and gave them to another colleague who was on maternity leave and collected novelty tea towels.

The towel is a dig at you and not a present of any kind.

I think this relationship has run its course, he has no respect for you.
Where is the love? Where is the romance? Where is the part where it is special in some way?

This would be in no way good enough and is probably indicative of the whole relationship. You can do alot better op.

I think that's a thoughtful present as you clearly needed a nicer towel. I get nothing unless I buy it myself so count yourself lucky.

He sounds tight. Seriously -he could have bought you a towel anytime just because you need one.

Shit present.

Ek but I didn’t need a nicer towel. I just need to unpack my normal one.
Plus, if we ever do get sets I would have to get rid of it.

Wow. Some of the posters set the bar veeeeerrrry low in terms of what they will accept.

In what other ways is he shit BirthdayTowel?

I feel there is a backstory here....

Oh shit. I bought my DM a towel and unfragranced shower gel for her Birthday because her bathroom was turned into a shower room. Did I get it wrong? I did take her out for lunch, she is 75 and a fan of practical so perhaps not.

I must be following in her footsteps as my DP bought me a food processor for Christmas because my old one was unusable and I love it. I'm not one for jewellery and Jo Malone candles.

It’s a shit gift, but there’s nothing adult about having towels that match. That’s just window dressing.

I'm struggling with the idea that there is just his towel and her towel. We just have household towels for anyone to use.

It sounds like he can't be bothered, it's not the cost, it's the lack of thought, now if you had said you'd love a nice big fluffy hotel style towel and he got you one, that is different. I'd love a big fluffy bath robe so if my husband bought me one I'd be over joyed, but you didn't want a towel.
He should know you best and obviously doesn't or just can't be bothered. How much does getting a shit present mean to you? Is it a deal breaker?

Same here Lonicera! Op is it your partner who insists on your own towels?

Interesting fact: Towels are very useful for water boarding, just invite him into the bathroom. Fill the bath with cold water first though.

For Christmas give him a card with a £10 note in it.

It's a bad choice but if the rest of the relationship is good I would not be too upset. However if the relationship has problems it may just be the final straw.

My Mum gave me a bale of towels for my 21st.
My sister got a car on hers.
It was at that point I went NC.
I would not be happy if DH bought me a towel. Even if he's not sure (which is rare) he asks DD or buys something sparkly.
LTB

@juells, I'd say a fiver.