To ask about the weird things you only learned from MN?

[Blanchedupetitpois]

It seems like in MN world there are all kinds of rules that I swear I’ve never seen expressed or followed in real life. What have you been most surprised by? I’ll start:

1. Adults don’t celebrate birthdays, and if you expect any recognition of yours, you’re being childish.

1. Halloween is exclusively an American import with no history in this country, and celebrating it is therefore tacky and meaningless.

1. Trick or treating is glorified begging.

1. Absolutely nobody other than you or your DP is remotely interested in your pregnancy, and even telling another person that you’re pregnant is akin to riding a donkey down the high street while calling for palm fronds to be laid at your feet in recognition of the impending miracle of your unborn child.

@StripySocksAndDocs someone just posted a link. Read with caution  I think the most gruesome part was, surprisingly, learning that a person wanked off a dolphin and when they stopped the dolphin killed itself

They clean it off with gloved hands.

I think there will be a distinct overlap between the non-toilet brush houses and those who have had a negative experience of trades people leaving their toilet in a state.

If only they had a toilet brush, the trades person would probably just clean up any mess they left, but its absence probably causes them to panic and run from the scene, not knowing what to do.

I think the most gruesome part was,

Must admit, didn't see that, I must not have seen the later posts. Yikes!

Odd thing I learned - leaflet droppers sometimes use kitchen spatulas to push something through letterboxes if i) it's a spring-loaded letterbox; ii) there's a risk of a dog.

I learned this from a thread where a MNetter was wondering why someone had posted a spatula through her door.

That being a SAHM is a sin and your husband WILL run off with a younger model and leave you and the kids starving and homeless and is just using you for 'womens work's.

That everyone has either Autisim or Depression if they act like an asshole in public.

Leave the bastard even though your relationship is perfectly normal and he was just being a bit of a dick, once, and you were probably being a bit of a dick the other day!

All men are arseholes.

Everyone irons there clothes, washes everyday, and has a cleaner.

Or handy sticks arranfan I have often delivered election registration form s and learned pretty quickly which letter boxes had nippy dogs behind them ( or indeed nippy letter boxes)

Rulers are good also. One place iwent to had a cat flap Inthe front door. It wasn't for the cat. When you tried to post something through the door the dog would stick its head through and snap at your legs !!

Hardly anyone stays in a resort for their holiday. Only people who have appeared on Jeremy Kyle are allowed to. Everyone else stays on a working farm in the middle of Hungary.

This is THE best line of the thread Love it!

Oh crap, the compulsion to google sootikins became too great. Noooooo, I did not need to know that

that people actually keep a basket of fucking slippers that they make any guest wear when they come to their house because otherwise they are bringing the whole world into their precious clean home and dirtying up their floor! Even at a bloody party/dinner party!

that people who have no class tend to think they are very classy and shout about said classiness

having an au pair is akin to slave labour (and why did you bother having children if you aren't going to look after them 24/7)

that people have the weirdest neighbours - I just am at so many stories on here - have never met anyone like these people irl

I googled 'sootikins' yesterday, now I have googled the Welsh for carrots.

Everyone is virtuous, ethical and would never ever be anything but an utter saint at all times.

Find a fiver on the floor? Report it to the police.
Fruit for breakfast? Too much sugar.

Etc Ad nauseum

Ad nauseam

Some kids have seriously never had anything to drink but water

I've learned that I'm actually a really gobby, bloshy bitch because most MNers just either stare open-mouthed and completely gob-smacked or are "fine with it" when a stranger does/says something really weird/offensive/anti-social, whereas I fucking won't

In addition to only ever drinking water, or 'very weak squash' they have never heard of orbeen to McDonalds but they do always have their 5 a day, sometimes many more.

The day I watched DM feed my nephews (neither overweight BTW) a Greggs sausage roll and a Fruit Shoot as an after school snack, I smirked and thought of Mumsnet.

Penis beaker!
That if you own a cat and let it out you are selfish.
All dogs are evil.
A child behaving badly in public must have special needs
That some people can’t cope without a parent and child space and will happily abuse those who use it if they don’t fit the criteria.
Child free weddings make you selfish
McDonald’s is to be never, ever given to a child

That their are apparently real people who genuinely believe that women can have penises and that men can get pregnant.

Every problem can be solved by LTB, NC or 101

if not, CAPS shouting seems to work for some.....

**

Oh please let it be cunt.

(After yesterday's googling "something" on this thread, I'm never going there again)

DontCallMe it's 'moron'.

Disappointing.

Thanks though.

When people post on here it is with full knowledge that this is an anonymous website yet cowards still post on here and then go: "OP has some privacy concerns" so the thread is removed. This is an anonymous website, post in the full knowledge of that or don't post and fuck off!

It's perfectly acceptable to use the word 'fag' referring to smoking! JFC. It's not homophobic in the slightest

Agreed.

I think people forget that life exists outside America

The way I see it with ‘fag’ is that it’s like sod, bastard or bloody. It depends on context.

I went outside for a fag. Fine
I’ve run out of fags. Fine.
Fuck you you fag. Not fine.

Also @SalemBlackCat4 i don't know if you're aware that these are sold in supermarkets UK-wise - homophobic meatballs!