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AIBU?

Strongly dislike DD's name and I want to change it. Am I horrible?

105 replies

michellebelle · 24/10/2018 22:17

Oh joy. Another name remorse moan on this forum :( I am feeling a bit inspired to talk about this after seeing another mum post on here about her name dilemma.... really want someone to talk to, feeling very alone, just now started talking about this.

Well let me try to keep it short. Had a difficult time picking names during pregnancy. Was under a lot of stress with mental health, job loss issues, family problems, money problems, car quit, actually what wasn't a problem? Couldn't really think straight. We eventually picked together a short list of 4 names and waited. I had a clear favourite that just felt so sweet, but my mum put me off it and I had a wobble thinking "eh maybe she's right and it isn't DH's favourite, so he should have his first pick"

Horrendous idea. Registered her and immediately regretted it. I had left my stressful job and finally things were looking up and I could think straight again and realised "What the actual f**k was I thinking" and couldn't stop crying wishing she was the other name. Complete and utter feeling of desperation. Now each and every time someone says her name it just doesn't fit and it makes me cringe. I have absolutely no connection to this name, whereas the other one had special meaning and it just felt so calming and nice.

I thought perhaps this was PND so I've given it 12 weeks now and I still feel the same. I really wish it had been my favourite name. Everything else is great so I don't think it's anything PND related at all.

I've talked to my entire family about it, even my gran and she made a joke and said "I'd prefer you renamed her Millie (gran's name) but your choice is nice too. Now get it done" DH says he thinks it would be best as well given how strongly I feel about it.

I just feel so bad about it. I almost feel like DD's name is a lie now if that makes sense? And her first 3 months are a lie as well? I also feel bad that her birth record will need to be amended and she'll have the old name on the record. This bothers me to the core. It would be really helpful if you told me if I'm being silly or if this is OK to do. Have you known anyone who has done this or has disliked a child's name, what did they do and how did things turn out.

Thanks ladies.... xxx

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MimiSunshine · 31/10/2018 08:27

Good for you. Honestly your DD will just find it an interesting story when she’s older.

With family / friends just keep it light, say it was a mistake and you’ve spent a long time thinking about and this is the right thingy do. Don’t let them debate it with you and start using the name you prefer straight away