Is my cleaner taking the piss?

[hazykates]

So - I'm a maths teacher - my cleaner (a much needed luxury as I'm a messy bint) asked if I could tutor her little girl who's struggling at school. I'm mad busy with work and family life but I'm also pretty terrible at saying no and like our cleaner a lot (she's really good!!!) so I said yes! I wasn't expecting her to pay, if the tutoring went on for more than a few sessions I thought I might ask for reciprocal payment if the subject was raised (she could clean for the hour I tutor her child for example). As things have turned out she hasn't ever offered anything in reciprocation for the favour, she's consistently late for the lesson without apology, and was downright rude when I had to rearrange the other day as my little girl was ill and my husband away. I'm loathe to say I can't do it anymore as think she'd have the hump and it took me so long to find a cleaner that works for us - but I can't help but feel a bit pissed off about feeling like she's taking advantage! AIBU?!

Bloody hell, entitled or what??

@aaaaargghhhhelpme

RTFT (Read The Future Thread)

OP has already got her keys back I'm guessing

Hang on, why can't you just exchange services? She cleans for an hour free, you tutor for an hour free? Surely it's win-win????

Why should you pay her and also tutor for free?

What kind of money? She could have cleaned instead of sitting on her entitled, spoilt, rude ass on the phone.

Fucking hell. How do people like this come to be in the world?

TYPE FASTER OP

I was reading the whole thread through (ex-teacher here who's been in this position, too) and as soon as you said she was arriving at 1 pm my eyes went straight to the clock, hoping I'd see the resolution!

Part 2:.... And i said - I know - tuition can be pricy - there’s a lot more work entailed than you might think - when i used to have private students i would charge £45 an hour - but again, like i said, I wouldn’t have minded swapping an hour of tuition for an hour of cleaning. So i shouldn’t have mentioned the money - she went off on one - £45 - that’s scandalous - how do you get away with charging that, what a rip off etc etc. She was PROPERLY pissed off. I let her finish and then said - to be honest I’m a bit put off with your reaction and lack of grace around this whole issue. I was happy to help mini cleaner but you’ve not respected that with any sense of gratitude or reciprocal offer to say thanks for my time. Like you, I have precious little spare time - and your carelessness with that has been tough to stomach. I then said - it made me uncomfortable carrying on any kind of working relationship and i was happy to pay her for today but could i have my keys back and could she leave. Which she did. Very quickly.

There comes a time where you have to meet brazen with assertive. Spell it out to her as short as her reply.

You will find another decent cleaner

I'm still shaking. Feel really upset and shocked by the whole experience

What a CF she is! (The cleaner, obviously)

So if you cost £45 an hour and you pay her (I'm guessing) £13-ish an hour, she's still getting the best deal if she cleaned for free and you tutored for free! So what's her problem?

Well done. What a dick.

OP you did the right thing. And a kind thing too, but she was clearly taking advantage of you, and would have continued too. Long term you are much better off

You're well rid OP, what a total CF 

Bravo op!!!

Well bloody done. She’s just shocking. And the worst part is she’ll never get it.

Havaina - haha. I am SO glad the op has her keys though. Another day another cf thread...!

I was going to say before, but didn't want to get jumped on by anyone, I bet she's jealous.

I've been a cleaner myself, and worked closely with cleaners. The majority were lovely but, as with all walks of life, some were unpleasant. There were a few who found it just too much to be in someone's home which they see as a lot nicer, and the owner does 'some easy office job, not as hard as cleaning.'

She's striking me as one of those to be honest.

And you tutoring for free? Well you should as you have more and a better and easier life. What? She's meant to be grateful? You think a lot of yourself op.

Maybe I'm off the mark but her behaviour indicates this maybe?

Unbelievable! Have a sit down and a tea. I’m not surprised you’re shaking, what a shock. I’m even shocked. I pay £30 a week for my daughters tutor and I’d love to clean for an hour instead. How ungrateful 💐

WOOOOOOOW! All I have to say is GO YOU OP! Silly bi*ch sounds like she needs to get a grip and a better understanding of CUSTOMER SERVICE WITH A SMILE !!

What a horrible cow she is. Glad you've got rid op

We need a "gobsmacked" emoticon.

I think I insulted her sense of pride somehow. God I don't know!

Oh what a horrible interaction. I hate confrontation like that. You did well to get your point across and still maintain a working relationship. Shame she couldn’t do the same but at least it’s all done now.

I hate confrontation so much - but I’m proud that I stayed calm and unemotional. And kicked her the hell out of dodge.

It could be as @platesandflowers says above. She sees you as privileged and better off than her, so you shouldn't expect payment?

There are too many entitled people that think they should get stuff for free .

Well done op. She doesn't deserve your tine. You gave her plenty of opportunities to put this right.