David Sedaris signing WHORE in MN poster's book

[TeachesOfPeaches]

He talks about this incident in the new Adam Buxton podcast episode 79.

Provides a bit more context as to why he does this and the other outrageous things he has written/drawn at book signings.

I now think the OP was being unreasonable as this seems to be part and parcel of being a fan of his.

I wasn't the first person who said you were acting like a groupie.

What’s that got to do with the price of fish? You’re the one I wanted an explanation from because your aggression towards DS was so palpable, and yet the way you sneered at me so misogynistic. It was weird, and I wanted an explanation.

antigon I find it very rude and disrespectful to bring up other threads. People are allowed to have a range of views on things.

Threads don't exist in vacuums. If people follow someone from thread to thread that would be wrong. Bringing up someone's relevant view on a related subject is not rude.

What's wrong with women being promiscuous? Besides, I don't think it's really used that way, post-mean girls. It's like if I call someone an asshole, I don't actually mean they are a small hole that poop comes out of, you know?

Because only women can be whores. Where's the equivalent word for men? The word is loaded. And no, it's not used to call someone an asshole. You seem curiously out of touch. Go on the Relationships and you will see posts from women being called 'whores' and 'sluts' by men as terms of abuse.

The equivalent of fangirl exists, its fanboi. Ans groupie unisex. Whore is not.

I remembered your banw, didn't even AS you.

Sorry - I don’t remember you at all.

@ThisIsTheFirstStep I find you have more front than (insert shop in your local country, in mine we'd say Myer). You have consistently belittled me, snarked at me, patronised me, put me down, mocked me and attempted to invalidate everything I have said. I have always answered your points. Always. Yet it took until now for you to acknowledge that a) you did snark at me and it btw was over the top and unnecessary, and b) you did bring it up. I am surprised that a lot more people aren't calling you out on your hypocrisy, demanding things from me you don't do yourself. If you are not honest and forthright we me on here, why should you expect the same of me? To be honest, I think you know exactly what you're doing and how nasty you are being. Gaslighting is the word. Sorry, I am not going to play your game any more. If you feel ready to have a mature and respectful discussion in good faith, fine. But until then, I am out of this thread. I have to go out anyway, and I've put off getting ready for long enough, now I really have to go or I'll be late. Tbh I feel like a fool because I let you troll me and use me for your amusement for so long. It is now obvious that having a discussion with you in good faith is out of the question anyway. So long.

Antigon why don’t you go and google the word groupie and then tell me if you still think it’s neutral?

"Don't you have important publishing work to be getting on with away from us non-publishing plebs who don't know about lists and whatnot?"

Please get over your obsession with me correcting you. Sorry you are so resentful of that and so nasty and immature. Now I know you're a troll for real, your patronising bullying and attempts at invalidation will not be replied to. You get 2 chances with me, that's it. You're all out. And I'm almost late so I am out of here for good this time.

Gaslighting is the word.

This is fucking rich from someone trying to pretend the word ‘groupie’ is gender neutral.

Thanks for the podcast link, that's naptime sorted

As for DS, I don't understand the fans upset.
He is known for his dark sense of humour. He uses the word in books she has bought and read. He puts a lot of time and effort into signings. Why does she enjoy his sense of humour until it's directed at her? Then suddenly she is offended and he is a very nasty man.

There was a young woman on twitter a while back who got her pic taken with Reece Shearsmith after a show and then sent him the pics (which he liked). She had her arm round him and was leaning in close (his hands were in front of him). In the second pic he was speaking to her as they moved apart. One of his fans commented on the pic he looked like he was saying put me down or something like that. He tweeted back 'not saying just thinking'. The woman got really offended and sent loads of tweets about how rude he was etc. Her friends started tweeting him he should apologise. So he has taken the time to stop after work and have his picture taken and talk to his fans, and then interact and joke with them in twitter, yet suddenly he's an arsehole? It's so unfair.

Another definition, this time from Wikipedia:

the term is almost universally used to describe young women who follow these individuals in hopes of establishing a sexual relationship with them or offering themselves for sex

Antigon I'm a big fan of Grayson Perry. So is my sister in law. We call ourself 'Grayson Groupies'. It's a joke. Both of us are older than him and the idea that we'd be screaming at one of his lectures and he'd be in the slightest bit interested in us is ludicrous.

Salem You've got it the wrong way round. It's not only recently that these words have been used in a jokey sense. It's only recently that people have started writing 'bitch' with asterisks. I've still got a greetings card I bought 25 yrs ago with the caption "I think I've discovered my inner bitch". The same applies to slutty underwear
and fuck-me shoes.

Woman I think if someone has queued up to buy one his books, it's reasonable for DS to assume they wouldn't keel over with shock at his writing 'whore' in said book. They would know how it was meant.

This is fucking rich from someone trying to pretend the word ‘groupie’ is gender neutral

From Wikipedia: "The term groupie is a slang word in reference to a fan of a particular musician, celebrity, or musical group who follows this person or band around while they're on tour or who attends as many of their public appearances as possible, usually in hopes of getting to know them more" Wikipedia

All bar one of the definitions I saw after a quick Google were gender neutral.

IAcceptCookies

Oh my god what a fucking joke. What is literally the very next sentence in that Wikipedia article? Go on. Tell me. Type it out here.

No first step - my judgement isn't based on that incident alone. I am wary of men (and women) who excuse the belittling of others under the defense of humour. I believe no one has the right to go through life unoffended - of course we rub up against different values and opinions and modes of expression. But there is a very invidious, empowered male caucus of slebs who seem to find women repulsive and terrifying and wish we put up and shut up. (Hello Stephen Fry.) I think Sedaris may be one.

How fucking disingenuous

IAcceptCookies She's got you there.

@MinaPaws What has Stephen Fry done?

What a dickhead.

Just because he acknowledges he is a dickhead, doesn't make him less of a dickhead.

Haha, yes, I only saw the brief excerpt on the search result which stopped just short, you're right .

There were other more neutral definitions, though.

AuntBeastie no worries, I don't expect you to remember me!

Women hating posters do get my attention though.

"She knew what he was like before she went to see him"

"Maybe she wanted it to happen, she was looking for attention"

"She didn't complain at the time, she didn't really mind it"

Sound familiar?

Antigon why don’t you go and google the word groupie and then tell me if you still think it’s neutral?

Why don't you scroll upthread and see that I never said groupie is neutral.

It's rude to misattribute posts to a poster.

Antigon I'm a big fan of Grayson Perry. So is my sister in law. We call ourself 'Grayson Groupies'. It's a joke. Both of us are older than him and the idea that we'd be screaming at one of his lectures and he'd be in the slightest bit interested in us is ludicrous.

I've no issue with this.

Women hating posters do get my attention though.

🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

I’ll debate whether or not I’m women hating when you admit at groupie is not and never has been a neutral term, and that you only pretended to agree that it was to shore up another poster who agrees with you.

There were other more neutral definitions, though.

And many, many more non-neutral ones. In fact I couldn’t find a single definition on the first page of the search results that didn’t acknowledge the fact that the term is almost exclusively used to refer to women.

@Antigon

You called it a unisex term.