David Sedaris signing WHORE in MN poster's book

[TeachesOfPeaches]

He talks about this incident in the new Adam Buxton podcast episode 79.

Provides a bit more context as to why he does this and the other outrageous things he has written/drawn at book signings.

I now think the OP was being unreasonable as this seems to be part and parcel of being a fan of his.

This whole thread is an effing mess. No links by the OP to the MN post she's referring to or the podcast she's referring to so that people can understand context.

People getting up in arms about something without context. General confusion and people piling in without really knowing what's going on.

Posters unfamiliar with Sedaris' work shouting him down and calling for his head on a stick, etc. Are there trolls out or something? Just delete this thread @TeachesOfPeaches and move on with your day.

salem I couldn't give a shit if he's on a list or not, until it was brought up I didn't even know he was on the list, I never look at said list, so can we stop mentioning it now. He is massively famous. He's hardly struggling to shift books.

"starry eyed" the insults keep coming, trying to paint me as some kind of naive fangirl, I haven't even read any of his latest books because I got bored of them, but feel free to keep insulting because you can't see people as being as big and clever and important as you. You are a very patronising individual.

Tbh I read the original post and just thought he was a dick, I still think he’s a dick.

salem yes yes yes, adopt away, gosh, everything you say turns into some personal insult, seriously.

I'm fucking sick of misogynists hiding in plain sight and sqealing that women are spoilsports and precious and too stupid to see the inherent wit and searing irony when men put them down again.

Me too.

I'm not an expert on David Sedaris, but I don't need to be an expert to have an opinion on his use of the word whore, unprovoked, to a female fan who was buying his book. I think I have all the context I need there.

The analogy of writing a racist slur in the book of a POC is an apt one.

ThisIsTheFirstStep it was his history of doing this sort of hilaaaaaaaarious thing at book signings that caused people to work out who he was in that thread. The OP didn’t name him.

"Because salem knows the industry and she's desperate for us all to know that, clearly."

When someone makes a goady as all fuck snark like that, you need to consider that you were the one who acts as if you are superior, dismissive and looks down on someone. Clearly that I knew about the list put your nose out of joint. Sorry. I was not 'desperate' for you to know, I only mentioned it because you brought up the list and seemed to genuinely think it meant something. I could have let you go on believing it, or said something. Since you were being goady and passive-aggressive from the start, I decided to say the truth about this. Sorry I took the wind out of your sails. It seems you get very resentful of anyone having a different view or knowing something else. It isn't my fault I knew about it. I just did. No special reason.

I'm patronising? Maybe but I think there is someone else on here who has a complete lack of self awareness, or at least understand how they themselves come across. You set the tone. Not me.

Right, I have to go and write an essay for my French course on the perils of the internet. I think the persecuting anger and sheer craziness on this thread (looking at you, Salem - good and rather apposite username - do you carry this rage around you all the time in real life, or do you just save it for anonymous threads?) is an excellent example. There I go, trying to find the silver lining!

Have a good day, y'all.

"goady as all fuck snark" "superior" "dismissive" "passive aggressive" "resentful" - continue continue! Anything else?

I knew about the list put your nose out of joint - that is literally hilarious. I honestly think you are one of the funniest people I've ever met. No one cares about the stupid list or your knowledge of it. I wasn't even the one who brought it up, so I have no idea why you're arguing about it with me.

SalemBlackCat4

Do you recall the 2016 White House Correspondent's dinner in which Larry Wilmore referred to Obama as 'my ngga'? It caused a huge amount of outcry, but the point is that among black people that word has been reclaimed, and is a term of endearment, trust and affection. So while I wouldn't defend David Sedaris, a white man, using that word I'm also not going to make a simplistic moral pronouncement about how Larry Gilmore must be bad because he called the President a ngga.

Now I take you point that gay men and woman have not been historically oppressed in exactly the same way. But they do share a history of being subjugated by straight, white men. And when DS uses the word 'whore', it is in a shared sense of solidarity. It is an in-joke between him and women - a recognition that a word that has been used as a slur against both him and her can instead be turned into something affectionate, reclaiming the weapon used against you both. Solidarity between different oppressed groups is nothing new.

And while we're having this discussion, what's your excuse for your own misogyny? 'Fan girl', 'groupie', 'silly', 'extreme' and 'sickenly sycophantic' are all heavily gendered insults, and I'm fairly confident you aren't using them out of a shared sense of solidarity with me.

It may be easy to get on the NYT best sellers list, but I think getting multiple series on Radio 4 is a little harder.

salem I set the tone? So it's my responsibility how you address people now?

Great, I'll remember my immense power next time.

KatherinaMinola

"I'm fucking sick of misogynists hiding in plain sight" Yes, this, exactly! That is what I meant when I said they he admits what he is upfront as his free pass to continue his behaviour. You worded it much better.

when DS uses the word 'whore', it is in a shared sense of solidarity. It is an in-joke between him and women

OK.

Wasn't my wording salem but wanted to +1 it as I agree.

Men are calling us whores out of solidarity now?

"ThisIsTheFirstStep Wed 17-Oct-18 09:55:33
aunt Because salem knows the industry and she's desperate for us all to know that, clearly."

If you 'didn't care about the list' why would you get so snarky and passive-aggressive about it. I did nothing but explain. You clearly took offence at that, it bothered you enough to make that snarky retort above.

Keep on deflecting your hostile behaviour onto me, ThisIsTheFirstStep.

Leaving the thread now, but please some of you stop being so simplistic! You know I didn't say 'Men are calling us whores out of solidarity now?'. Why pretend that I did when WE BOTH KNOW I didn't?

Is your mock outrage really worth more to you than trying to engage with something complicated and interesting?

And when DS uses the word 'whore', it is in a shared sense of solidarity. It is an in-joke between him and women - a recognition that a word that has been used as a slur against both him and her can instead be turned into something affectionate, reclaiming the weapon used against you both

Oh right. Well of course. I'm sure every women in the world will nod sagely and go like 'yeah bruvva' when he calls them a whore.

In my world he'd be taught to treat women with actual respect, but there you go.

salem I never want to hear the word list again.

Projecting hostile behaviour? Take a look at how many insults you've used and get back to me on that.

Why pretend that I did when WE BOTH KNOW I didn't?

You said “when DS uses the word 'whore', it is in a shared sense of solidarity. It is an in-joke between him and women”.

Help me understand where I’m misreading you here?

I came across this saying last night. Had to re-google it, because it seems apt for this situation. I committed the sin of simply correcting someone. That person believes I was being patronising, when I was only contributing to the conversation and addressed the point of sales.
I wasn't 'desperate' to let everyone know. I was purely saying what I had learned about the list. That is all. If I had have known it would make someone so resentful that they had to make out I was being 'patronising' for knowing something, I wouldn't have been bothered.

Do not correct a fool, or he will hate you; correct a wise man, and he will appreciate you.

David Sedaris is gay. It's v common for gay men to use the words 'tart', 'whore', 'bitch' in relation to themselves or others. It's often done affectionately. I know heterosexual couples where 'slutty' or 'tarty' is used as a compliment. Can't stand this new puritanism by the language police supposedly in the cause of feminism.

It's ridiculous for people who've never heard of David Sedaris to make totally false assumptions about his writing, humour, character from one post.

I like his humour and his writing, which is also often thoughtful and serious. He's a shrewd observer of human nature. I like the way he questions what you're supposed to say. He's honest.

He might not appeal to you. So what? I might not laugh at what you think is funny. We're allowed to have different tastes in humour. I think there's a good chance that you're the sort of people he's laughing at and I'm laughing along with him.