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David Sedaris signing WHORE in MN poster's book

274 replies

TeachesOfPeaches · 17/10/2018 07:45

He talks about this incident in the new Adam Buxton podcast episode 79.

Provides a bit more context as to why he does this and the other outrageous things he has written/drawn at book signings.

I now think the OP was being unreasonable as this seems to be part and parcel of being a fan of his.

OP posts:
Snomade · 17/10/2018 09:16

'oh I am just sooooo outrageous and shocking and its for art don't ch know and if you don;t get it you aren;t a fan so ner ner ner'

Agree. To me it comes across like an A level student who's trying to be edgy. Cringe.

KatherinaMinola · 17/10/2018 09:19

It's just his style is seems

Oh well then, fine Hmm

I remember the thread. Don't really know who he is and haven't read his work but I don't plan to now.

Nice for him that he's still getting lols by telling anecdotes about calling a female reader a whore at a book signing. What an edgy and funny man.

KatherinaMinola · 17/10/2018 09:20

IIRC that reader was properly shaken up and upset by what was meant to be a real treat, meeting one of her favourite writers.

mostdays · 17/10/2018 09:21

He sounds like a prick.

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 17/10/2018 09:22

I guess I don't really get why it's not ok for him to write 'whore' but it is ok for people on here to be calling him weird/little etc.

He's a writer. He's not a politician or a manager or a teacher. And I think sometimes we have to accept that not everyone on the planet is a lovely, fluffy, respectful, kind person. He's a bit odd, a bit messed up, a bit of a narcissist...he fully admits all those things in his book, so why then go to his book signing and expect him to be different and to write 'have a lovely cuddly friendly day, friend!'

I wouldn't like to be called a whore either but I wouldn't get offended or upset by it, especially in the context.

claraschu · 17/10/2018 09:23

David Sedaris could hardly be farther from an A level student trying to be edgy or some loser wittering on on Twitter. He is also not going to care if a few people return his books- (first on the New York Times best seller list, etc). He is a complex, humane, self-deprecating, brilliant writer and humorist.

SalemBlackCat4 · 17/10/2018 09:24

@claraschu Yet more enabling. Many, MANY people suffer traumatic childhoods, not just super weird, yet are able to become civilised adults. I cannot believe people are making EXCUSES for his absolutely disgusting behaviour!!!

AuntBeastie · 17/10/2018 09:24

To all of you saying he sounds awful and you wouldn’t go to see him - that’s fine! You’re allowed to like what you like. There are loads of writers and comedians I don’t like and wouldn’t bother to see. But I don’t go around berating people who do like those writers and comedians or criticising them for what they like.

And if I did go and see a writer I was a fan of, and they behaved in a completely typical way which was wholly in keeping with their style and past behaviour, I wouldn’t then try to stir up sympathy for myself by complaining about it.

YetAnotherSpartacus · 17/10/2018 09:26

I bet he doesn't write such offensive things in men's books

Particularly if they are bigger than him.

SinkGirl · 17/10/2018 09:27

It’s amazing how misogyny is still regarded as such a negligible issue.

If he’d written a hideous racial slur in the book of a POC, would people still defend him?

Some would I suppose, just part of the ridiculous hero-worship of “celebrities”.

Tomorrowillbeachicken · 17/10/2018 09:27

Tbh I don’t think is ever any excuse good enough to write that.

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 17/10/2018 09:28

I bet he doesn't write such offensive things in men's books

I wouldn't bet any amount of money on that, I'd say he seems to have as deep a loathing for men as for women.

KatherinaMinola · 17/10/2018 09:30

He is a complex, humane, self-deprecating, brilliant writer and humorist who calls women whores.

He's a misogynist.

I guess I don't really get why it's not ok for him to write 'whore' but it is ok for people on here to be calling him weird/little etc.

You do understand the difference between people commenting on a figure in the public eye who has done some misdeed, and a figure in the public eye attacking a member of the public without provocation?

SalemBlackCat4 · 17/10/2018 09:32

@ThisIsTheFirstStep Are you serious? Do you honestly think whore and weird or little are in any way in the same country, let alone town, let alone ballpark? You cannot be serious!

"He's a bit odd, a bit messed up, a bit of a narcissist...he fully admits all those things in his book" Yes, as a form of double bluff meaning it gives him the excuse to act like it if he admits it, so he gets people adjusted to the idea that he is an abusive woman-hating arsehole. Contrary to what some seem to think on here, I think copping to something does NOT give you an excuse or free pass to continue said behaviour. Admitting it is nothing unless you try and change the behaviour. He has no remorse. No remorse at all, none whatsoever. He admits it so he can keep on doing it. The fuck if I would allow him to, if it were me.

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 17/10/2018 09:33

"You do understand the difference between people commenting on a figure in the public eye who has done some misdeed, and a figure in the public eye attacking a member of the public without provocation?"

You can drop the patronising tone if you want to have an actual discussion. Otherwise, don't bother replying to me again because I will ignore you.

Yes, those things are different. But if you're going to complain about someone being rude and offensive, then you should probably not make rude and offensive comments yourself.

I guess calling him horrible is acceptable, since this terrible misdeed was viewed as horrible. Calling him little? What has that to do with anything?

SalemBlackCat4 · 17/10/2018 09:35

claraschu a person who have a blatant hatred of women and who abuses women and girls is NOT a 'humane' person. I feel you have a very sick idea of what humane actually means, if you genuinely think he is.

BTW, it is EASY to get on the NYT Best seller's list, almost any one can - they mainly go buy stock passed on to stores, not on actual copies actually sold. It really means nothing.

Antigon · 17/10/2018 09:36

Are you his publicist, OP?

If so, you could improve. Your posts are all over the place.

TheRealHousewife · 17/10/2018 09:36

Who is David Sedaris? I’m sure I live in parallel universe as increasingly I don’t know 🤷‍♀️ stuff about ought that’s being posted on mn Grin

AngryAttackKittens · 17/10/2018 09:37

Why is "well he does this" an excuse for the fact that he does this?

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 17/10/2018 09:37

salem I don't recall saying they were in the same ballpark, no. But I don't think it makes sense to call someone out on being insulting and then throwing insults yourself.

Is he a 'woman-hating arsehole'? Because he wrote 'whore' in a book? He's one of the few male writers I can actually stomach because he actually portrays women as people and not just weird caricatures of how women are thought to be by clueless men. So he doesn't come across as a woman hater to me.

As I said, yes, I don't like the word, I wouldn't like to be called that, but the insistence that the entire of life is sanitised and every single person is 100% kind and nice at all times is a bit over the top in my opinion. Sometimes people do weird, fucked up things. Not everyone is perfect all the time.

ThisIsTheFirstStep · 17/10/2018 09:38

salem it's easy to get on the NYT best seller list? Hardly. Whatever you think of him, you can hardly claim he's not a successful author, he's one of the most successful contemporary authors.

AuntBeastie · 17/10/2018 09:39

Lots of people who heard about David Sedaris for the first time ten minutes ago but are now suddenly experts on him on this thread Hmm

Context is everything. All of this moralising outcry that its ‘never ok’ to call someone a whore is spectacularly missing the point. From Sedaris it’s a term of endearment, for one thing (just like many wome have reclaimed ‘bitch’). It’s fine if you don’t want to use these words that way yourself, but you don’t get to pretend that everyone uses language the same way you do and then claim to be offended by them.

David Sedaris’s books catalogue the violence of homophobia, racism and misogyny he witnessed on a daily basis and explores what it is that makes people behave that way. His works are weird and ironic and heartfelt and incisive and anxiety-ridden and basically far too complicated to be distilled into a sentiment as bland and uninformed as ‘he called someone a whore so he’s bad’

Antigon · 17/10/2018 09:42

@AuntBeastie

From Sedaris it’s a term of endearment, for one thing (just like many wome have reclaimed ‘bitch’). It’

Are you serious? It's women who are called whores so a man can't 'reclaim' the word. You sound like a deluded groupie.

Peartree17 · 17/10/2018 09:43

Sorry, but as someone who has read and heard a LOT of David Sedaris' work, I am struggling to reconcile what I experience with the figure hwo has a 'blatant hatred of women and who abuses women and girls'. Can you direct me to specific essays? I have three volumes on my shelves, so there's a chance that I would have the offending article and could check it out for myself. Differing interpretations is one of the excitements of art, after all.

SalemBlackCat4 · 17/10/2018 09:44

ThisIsTheFirstStep "but the insistence that the entire of life is sanitised and every single person is 100% kind and nice at all times is a bit over the top in my opinion." Why do you have to go to such extremes? It doesn't have to be either extremes, you know. I find your insistence that if a person isn't abusive and calling women names, then they must have a sanitised life with every single 100% kind and nice to be way way over the top and a very silly argument. There IS a middle ground.

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