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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not support DH in his half marathon tomorrow

130 replies

AlloVeraLouRolls · 13/10/2018 22:18

A) it's not his first. He's an old pro
B) it's going to pour with rain all day
C) it's in Peterborough

I still feel guilty for not going to cheer him from the sidelines though.

Should I go and support him? You decide. You've got until 7am tomorrow to say Yay or Nay.

OP posts:
DewDropsonKittens · 13/10/2018 22:50

But ops not in Aberdeen

TruelyTruelyScrumptious · 13/10/2018 22:51

Gosh truely how awful.

1st one was awful as it was a tri swim and we were trapped there. 2nd one was a half marathon I managed to get them away.

I never watch my DH, he is doing NYC in 2 weeks and I am going to New York but won't watch.

lottiegarbanzo · 13/10/2018 22:55

Why would you? It's his hobby (does he attend to support yours?) and, it's not a performance. If it was amdram that would be different.

Meeting at the end for a nice meal and journey home could be nice, if you want to and have something fun to do during the day.

Darkstar4855 · 13/10/2018 22:56

YANBU but you could run him a bath and/or make him a nice meal when he gets home as a compromise.

Blatherskite · 13/10/2018 22:57

I don't think DH and the kids have turned up to watch me since one of my very early 10ks. I've done a dozen halves and a marathon since and he's been to none of them.

I, on the other hand, have dragged grumpy kids around the Forest of Dean to watch him run a half Hmm

I'd stay at home. It's going to be grotty tomorrow. I'm considering bailing on my own run so wouldn't expect anyone to watch me.

ToEarlyForDecorations · 13/10/2018 23:04

Good luck to OP's partner for the Frank Perkins run tomorrow. (That's the name of the Peterborough Half Marathon.)

Some roads are closed tomorrow for the run. I don't think they are running down the Frank Perkins Parkway though.

I'll second what's wrong with Peterborough. I'll be in bed all morning to so the runners can crack on without me.

TeddybearBaby · 13/10/2018 23:07

My DH is the the same as this. God knows how many marathons we’re up to now and then there’s the iron man next year that he’s training for. The days of my support have sailed tbh now that it’s a regular occurrence. Stay in bed, or go if you like but don’t feel under any pressure 😘

Singletomingle · 13/10/2018 23:07

I'm amazed by most of the comments I stood at the finish of everyone of my ex's events with our DC. I've done plenty myself and while I wouldnt want anyone with me at the start, this year was the first time I ran a half marathon and no one was at the finish. Actually was the most alone I've felt since I split with my wife. Unless you're husband is Mo Farah any run is a huge achievement and deserved to be shared if at all possible.

Threehoursfromhome · 13/10/2018 23:10

YANBU. I run half marathons, and I don't expect family to come and support me. It's just not very interesting for them. It's not that interesting for me, to be frank, and I'm running them. Unless, I suppose, he's expecting to win it, or something. Then it might be nice to go along.

LoudestRoar · 13/10/2018 23:10

Stay at home! DH and I are both runners, and like going to support each other, as long as the weather is nice, and the spectator has somewhere to keep dcs entertained.
I'm your circumstances, we'd stay at home!

LastOneDancing · 13/10/2018 23:11

I've got my first half tomorrow. It's also celebrating a milestone birthday - so you could say its an extra, super special event Wink

I've still told my supporters to stay at home. No point dragging everyone out in the rain for 30 seconds of me shuffling past looking miserable and possibly crying

Nesssie · 13/10/2018 23:11

TruelyTruelyScrumptious I don’t understand why you would go all the way out there and not watch?
I’m also going to support my DP run it, you only have to turn up at the end? Why go all the way there and not watch?

lottiegarbanzo · 13/10/2018 23:13

Running races is just what runners do. Completing a half marathon is not a huge achievement if they've trained for it. It's what they expect. Beating their PB would an achievement.

Joining a running club would be a good choice for any lonely runner. Instant companions, with the same inetrest, running the same race, available to meet at the finish for mutual congratulation. Perfect.

BusterTheBulldog · 13/10/2018 23:14

I’m running it and my husband isn’t coming for exactly those reasons!

thenightsky · 13/10/2018 23:18

I've been doing halfs every other weekend for bloody years (until arthritis kicked in 18 months ago). I would never expect a family member to come with me.

TeddybearBaby · 13/10/2018 23:18

Oh and just to add....... my husband was a spectator last year and said to me ‘I didn’t realise how truly shit it was on this side. Never waste your time again’ 😂. I was pleased he got to witness what it’s like with two kids for a second of them running by. It’s so ‘old hat’ to him now that he wouldn’t give a shite whether we were there or not haha

Legageddon · 13/10/2018 23:24

I’ve done numerous half marathons, over 2 marathons and a few ultras- no one has ever come along to even meet me at the finish. It’s fine. I do them for me.

I did think they might fancy it when I did London but it’s a bit of a trek and a lot of standing around so they declined. Fair enough. They can use the tracker if it’s a big event.

It’s my hobby not theirs and a day stood in the rain is grim.

Do your own thing, enjoy a lie in and then make him a nice meal when he gets back.

Legageddon · 13/10/2018 23:25

Over 20 not over 2!

InionEile · 13/10/2018 23:35

I run races and my DH rarely comes out to support me because we have young kids (3 and 6) and it's a pain to get them to the race and then just stand around and the races usually start early, around 8am.

There's no need to cheer him on! It's not like it's the Boston Marathon or something...

Bebopaloola · 13/10/2018 23:40

No. Why on earth would you? It's his thing not yours. If it was special then yes, but it's not.

TruelyTruelyScrumptious · 13/10/2018 23:46

TruelyTruelyScrumptious I don’t understand why you would go all the way out there and not watch?

Because you don't actually see them. more chance of seeing them on tv.

thousands of people at the end- impossible to find them, they don't have a phone with them.

Last time I went was a tri- it was chaos- they couldn't retrieve their stuff to get phones to call me to tell me where they were, I couldn't find them.

HildaZelda · 13/10/2018 23:47

God no, stay at home and have a lie in. My DH has a hobby that I have absolutely no interest in. I've been to about 2 events and that's it. Bored me solid.

MajesticWhine · 13/10/2018 23:56

Don't go. He needs to understand that it's boring and no one wants to watch. Especially as it's not the first.

Holdingonbarely · 14/10/2018 00:03

If it’s his 25th then Yanbu
If it’s his 3rd then Yabu
Surely it’s all context!

Why don’t you think how you would (truly) feel if he didn’t support you in something. It’s the tiny bits of support that help everything.
I mean if he doesn’t give a shit then fine, but he would like you there. Don’t think about things in that excact moment, think about how they help or don’t help everything long term.

Holdingonbarely · 14/10/2018 00:04

@MajesticWhine
That’s such a cunty thing to say. How do you know what other people think is or isn’t boring.

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