To think middle aged people shouldn’t get tattoos?

[Sohardtochooseausername]

I am breaking up with my DP.

I am thinking I’d like to get a tattoo (my first) which would mark my new found freedom from him. It would be a secret thing I’d know about and he never would because it’s over between us. That kind of thing.

The thing is, I’m in my 40s and there’s a part of me that’s being very judgemental, thinking I’m too old/getting a tattoo at my age would be sad.

AIBU? And if so what tattoo should I get and where?

defrack and sidelook I’m glad it’s worked well for you.

Never too old, lots of tats represent new beginnings so i would look at it and remember that, not the ex. Go for it

I'm not a fan of tattoos tbh, but I wouldn't let age or anything else stop me getting one if I wanted to and I don't judge anyone else for having them.

Go for it if you want to. I'm 34 and booked in to get my first tattoo at the end of the month. It's something I'm doing just for me, that doesn't relate to kids or other responsibilities.

I'm 43 and booked in for my first tomorrow. I think I'm having a midlife crisis and doing some of the things I'd have been too shit scared to do years ago.

Yep some people hate them but it depends very much on the design, they can look brilliant. Hopefully mine will!

A HCP told me recently that tatts were a form of advertised self-harm. Not sure what I think about that.

FTR, I have none, want none, and I'm 60, but dd really really thinks it would be so cool if I did have one (preferably lots, ergh!). But I haven't jumped off any bridges just because my mates were, either.

I think 40 is the perfect age to get a tattoo.

I do wonder why you've asked what you should get where, when you've had a picture for 10 years, though.

My dad got his first tattoo at the age of 70. He told no one and just went out one day and came home with it. Didn't even tell my Mum.

It was a Remembrance Day poppy to remember his own dad who died in WW2.

My teenage kids were like GRANDDAD'S GOT A TATTOO! My dad had spent his whole working life dressed in a suit, very businesslike.. is shy, reserved and the last person you would expect to come home with a tattoo.

He just thought "fuck it"

We all thought fair play to him.

I got mine last year - early 40s. It’s a (short) line from a song that means a lot to me, in old school typewriter font. It’s on my inner, lower arm, so mainly covered by clothes, and easily hidden if I needed to. I love it so much. I don’t have the urge to get more, but I am so glad I got it, and got it at the time I did - DP and I were going through a really rough time because of circumstances outside our relationship, and it reminds me that I am strong, and brave, and can get through anything.

I do wonder why you've asked what you should get where, when you've had a picture for 10 years, though.

Because I was interested.

I'm 43 and booked in for my first tomorrow. I think I'm having a midlife crisis and doing some of the things I'd have been too shit scared to do years ago.

Yep some people hate them but it depends very much on the design, they can look brilliant. Hopefully mine will!

Brilliant! Good luck :-)

Never too old for a tattoo! :)

I;m fifty and am in the middle of getting a full back piece done, so no you are not too old.

I'd be partial to one that said
"Left the Bastard"

I think getting a tattoo for the reasons you stated sounds rather immature and you may regret it later.

I don't like tattoos. I don't judge other people for getting them though. I'm just not a fan, personally.

I do think that it's a bit silly to think that just because a person has reached an arbitrarily defined age, they "shouldn't" do a particular thing. If you want to do it, go for it! And to hell with what anyone else thinks, of the tattoo or of the fact that you got it during "middle age".

FWIW, I don't think 40 is middle aged, either.

l got my first one in my early 40s, after l got divorced. Even though it wasn't on public display, it tickled me that he'd have had a pink fit if he'd seen it. l've got five now, and planning another two. They're all pretty small and discreet, but l do have a hankering for a glorious realistic bumble bee on my hand....

I just had one, half a sleeve & I am 50, nope you do what you want, doesn't matter about age

A) 40s is NOT middle aged

B) You should do whatever the fuck you like regardless of other people's opinions.

I agree with you about B), but you're kidding yourself if you don't think 40 is middle aged, you might not look it or feel it, but life expectancy for a woman living in the UK born in 1978 is 73 years, so at 40 you are easily in the middle years of your life.

@tomhardyswife - I am not generally a fan but that is one great example of a reason to get a tattoo!

Given a lot of tats don't age well... plus people get fat so then body shape changes. Middle age might be just right time to get a tat. At least it won't have so many years of looking faded or stretched.

My DH is booked to get his first next year. He'll be 64. I wish he'd done it years ago.

Just ask yourself whether you like your hair or clothes from 10 years ago, will you still like the tattoo??

I like my hair and clothes from 20 years ago! And there are books, paintings, bands, films, pieces of furniture and other items that I’ve loved since childhood. Most people don’t get tired of things they really love after a year or two.

Emperor, for the calculation I think it's generally accepted to deduct childhood. I also thought lifespan was closer to 80 or so? Anyway I guess that would put middle age closer to 50 in terms of actual age but it's also pretty much a state of mind...