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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DS playing immature games!

128 replies

guildheighliner · 08/10/2018 09:47

Just as it sounds, my DS insists on playing with a group of friends in some sort of fantasy make believe world. He dresses up as an elf and runs around making loads of noise etc.

This would be fine, but I'm starting to think it might damage DSs chances at other friendships and how he interacts with others, its all he seems to talk about and is extremely enthusiastic about it!

Should I try and curtail it?

OP posts:
easyandy101 · 08/10/2018 10:15

Your ds is a nerd, deal with it, he could be many worse things

LordNibbler · 08/10/2018 10:15

Sounds like he's having a lot of fun, and he's not hurting anyone. I think I'd rather my son be running around a forest dressed as an elf than going down town getting drunk and puking up everywhere like lots of 23 year olds.

Givemeallyourcucumber · 08/10/2018 10:21

Sounds like he's having fun with his friends. Just because you don't like it doesn't mean he isn't allowed.

Let him enjoy his life doing what he enjoys. He has friends. Why is that not enough.
Are you embarrassed by him?

How do you know he won't met someone and fall in love?

spiderlight · 08/10/2018 10:23

Loads of my friends LARP. They're all healthy, functioning professionals, all married, and most of them have kids and take them along too. I don't entirely get it myself but if he's enjoying it, let him get on with it. Surely he's making friends at LARP events - they seem to be a very social bunch, from what I see my friends getting up to.

Karmin · 08/10/2018 10:24

He is an adult, not your business unless he asks for an opinion

YippeeKayakOtherBuckets · 08/10/2018 10:24

Amazing.

He sounds wonderful. And he’s only 23 fgs, why are you worried about him meeting girls? He’s got his whole life ahead of him to find a partner.

Is he on the spectrum? Not the point of the thread I know but I have a working theory about ASD and LARP/D&D so this interests me.

drspouse · 08/10/2018 10:25

If he's 23 I think you're a bit late!
Maybe if you'd had a word when he was 10 you might have had a chance.

KarrisWhiteOak · 08/10/2018 10:25

Sounds far more fun than going out drinking and clubbing every weekend.

thegreylady · 08/10/2018 10:26

What is LARP please?

Gersemi · 08/10/2018 10:27

Try rephrasing your post.

"Just as it sounds, my DS insists on playing with a group of friends in some sort of fantasy make believe world where everyone thinks it's desperately important to kick balls into nets. He dresses up in football strip and runs around making loads of noise etc.

This would be fine, but I'm starting to think it might damage DSs chances at other friendships and how he interacts with others, its all he seems to talk about and is extremely enthusiastic about it!"

Would you still be worried?

Singlenotsingle · 08/10/2018 10:27

Let him get on with it. At least it's harmless.

Grumpbum123 · 08/10/2018 10:28

I know an extremely an excellent lecturer at a well known uni into LARP has a brilliant an wide circle of friends a girlfriend and two beautiful children. Hasn’t harmed him in one bit

StormTreader · 08/10/2018 10:29

He's spending all his time being creative, being involved in big social events and spending time outside. Would it be better if he was slumped in his room playing Fortnite?

ChocolateChipMuffin2016 · 08/10/2018 10:30

@thegreylady Live Action Role Play.
Sounds fun to me!

ThumbWitchesAbroad · 08/10/2018 10:32

I agree with the "let him get on with it" posters.
It's not "immature", it's his hobby.
Lots of girls/women are into LARPing as well, so he may even find a girlfriend who does it too and then they can share their hobby.

Just because you don't like it, or possibly think it's "silly", doesn't mean you're right.

ChairmanMiaow123 · 08/10/2018 10:32

My husband does Live Role playing and has done for about 30 years. He and his pals are all perfectly well adjusted, married men with children and good jobs - your little fella will be fine and dandy, i’ll be bound. Smile
Ostensibly they get together to get together, but some chaps bond over football or golf, etc; my husband loves his D&D, Warhammer and LARP-ing.

RB68 · 08/10/2018 10:34

Maybe there was something missing in his childhood....

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 08/10/2018 10:34

Live Action Role Play @thegreylady

It tends to be dressing up and playing swords and camping like Legolas or whatever. Not my thing but I can’t see why it’s an issue for OP!

TatterdemalionAspie · 08/10/2018 10:34

You sound really quite nasty.

He's 23 - what the hell has it got to do with you what an adult does in their spare time?

BabySharkAteMyHamster · 08/10/2018 10:35

Bloody hell, is that all ?? He sounds like a nice lad with a harmless hobby. Leave him be.

SleepingStandingUp · 08/10/2018 10:35

But this isn't some weird thing your ADULT son just made up is it. LARP is a huge industry and community. Women do it too so he can find a lovely woman who shares his passion for it.

If he's not working because he's busy making foam swords that's a different t matter. What does he currently do for work?

RangeRider · 08/10/2018 10:36

Far better for him than drinking to excess, stumbling out of the pub / club and getting into a fight. Or taking up cycling which would involve dressing in lycra and reduce his chance of finding / keeping a woman AND having kids!
Sounds like fabulous fun to me.

SpoonBlender · 08/10/2018 10:36

I'd much rather any kid of mine was into LARPing than the boys classics of pubs and cars. Let him be, OP. He's having fun and getting exercise and making stuff - you need to be pretty practical to do that sort of thing. It's a wide hobby with lots of opportunity to meet new people - yes, including girls!

trulybadlydeeply · 08/10/2018 10:37

It sounds fantastic, and it also sounds like it gives him a great social life. He probably won't want to spend too much of his spare time with those who don't share his interest, but that's fine. I'm sure he will also have plenty of opportunity to meet a girlfriend/boyfriend through this.

If I had a colleague who was into this, I would be really interested and ask about it, to see photos etc, so I think it could encourage work relationships. It's also something completely different on his cv, shows he has a life outside work, and that he's creative and dedicated. I cannot honestly see what's not to like about all this.

easyandy101 · 08/10/2018 10:39

"If he's not working because he's busy making foam swords that's a different t matter. What does he currently do for work?"

Making the weapons is a career in itself, as you said it's a huge industry and not everyone is good at making the props so some people make them and sell them.