that school won’t cut me any slack for double drop offs?

[Polkadotdash]

We moved house in the summer and we’ve ended up with three kids at two different primary schools. I accept that it is what it is and we have to just fit in where there are places. However, after a month of nearly killing myself to drop kids off at both schools, two miles apart who start at exactly the same time, I’ve asked both schools if they can help to take the pressure off me by accepting one child five mins early and maybe dropping the late mark drama for the other children. Neither school will budge. One school has a breakfast club which they’ve suggested I use for £5 a day. £25 per week, nearly £1000 per school year for five mins care (no food required). I can’t afford this.
It’s all been capped off today by one parent (who I don’t know) shouting something at me about the importance of not being late when I was trying to make my four year old run up the hill to school. I can’t put up with this for the next 5 years. What should I do? Should the school be more caring?

What age does the school that the middle child start from? Can the reception age child be put on the waiting list for that school?

I’m going to go against the grain here and say that the school isn’t bu. Most schools have a window of drop off and it sounds as though you have been managing to get them there on time albeit it’s been a rush. And if not then you just have to pay for breakfast club - even if it’s just for 5 mins (though it would probably be worth your while dropping earlier to give you more breathing space and allow them to have breakfast).
In my old job I was mostly able to get to the school and pick my children up on time but sometimes if something came up at work I would be delayed by 15 mins. I still paid for the after school club each day and I would see many parents going in to collect at the same time as me. I wouldn’t have dreamt of asking if the school could just look after them for free as I’d only be about 5 mins after all the other children had been collected.

Could you claim tax free childcare to help with the costs of breakfast club? I know it's only 20% but it's better than nothing and will take some pressure off.

Alternatively, would you qualify for pupil premium and could perhaps ask school to contribute towards breakfast club?

Just read that you can’t afford breakfast club. If that is really the case after you’ve sat down and seen if you can make any savings anywhere then I think your only option is to move all the children to the same school even if it’s further away/not as good. I know you say their settled but you aren’t able to get them to your chosen schools.

Other option would be to keep your youngest home as you suggested until middle child can be left - most kids in year 5 walk to school alone here.

I'm not actually sure what the OP wants to happen.
it seems like the only outcomes she would be happy with are:

1. School accepts that her DC is late every day Or
2. Places are found for her YR and Y6 DCs at the Y3 school (not the other way round, she doens't want to move the Y3 child).

Realistically (1) is never going to happen, and (2) will not happen straight away or possibly for a long time. Therefore I do think the OP does need to make some effort to find some workaround.

There have been lots of suggestions on here about how to make the best of the situation she has. If paying for childcare is not affordable, the most obvious solution is to ask a parent to watch the Y3 child before school (I expect loads of parents arrive before the school gates open) - and she could return the favour by, say, offering holiday childcare. Or she could find a parent in the same situation with whom she can share school runs. If she asks school Reception they may be able to suggest such a parent.

Will DC2’s school really not accept him through the at 8.30am. That way you’d have enough time to get to other school. Definitely have all kids on all waiting lists and put in appeals. Also you could defer DC3’s place for now. Then take DC2 to school and DC1 walk himself. DC3 could perhaps go to pre school until he’s 5?

That should be through school office.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo I wouldn't expect the school office to allow DC2 in early - it's chaotically busy at that sort of time, in our school office at least, and by allowing them in they'd be taking responsibility for and committing to being able to supervise that child. They can't do that properly in a busy office and equally the teachers will likely be busy either with meetings or preparation for the day so wouldn't be able to supervise either.

Am I right in thinking that you've managed to move the y6 child to local junior school, got a place for 4yr old at the linked infants but have had to keep y3 child at old infant/junior school due to no spaces at the one near your new house which siblings now attend?

I'm assuming your y3 child has made lots of friends at the 'old' school, is there really nobody that could help you if you explained? Maybe drop middle child at a friend's that walks and he/she could tag along. Even offer some money in return, but less than the BS club would cost? Or offer reward in kind that you have a friend over for tea once a week as a TY.

If my understanding is right, you've stood with these parents for 3yrs in the playground at infants, so should know them well enough to explain your issues and ask if they could help. Even if they could do a few days a week, just something, anything to take a bit of pressure off.

Are you a SAHM?
You've mentioned you drive and there was school that was willing to accept all 3 of them but was "too far away for friends".
Just seems mad to me as this would definitely be the most obvious choice and easiest to facilitate.

HE the lot or just the year 3 child.

My understanding is OP only moved in the summer so knows no one. LA allocated her these schools.

get your yr6 to watch the youngest till they go in

So a 10 year old looking after a 4 year old on the street early in the morning.

I wouldn't. I don't even know if that is legal.

I doubt you could leave a 10year old and a 4 year old home alone let alone out on a street corner

Are their school Facebook pages? There will be other families with thus issue. You need to find one to share with- you do infant school run and someone else does junior school run. We have this a lot at our school and most families pair up with one or two other families to sort it. Put it on the school or pta Facebook page or ask if anyone knows anyone via the class WhatsApp group

I am in the same situation. I pay for 15 mins breakfast club for child 1 at school 1 and 15 mins for child 2 at after school club at school 2.

I would never dream of taking or picking up either child late.

Suck it up and pay like the rest of us do.

Yes, but we don't all have spare money.

The LA just allocated me 2 different schools, I didn’t accept them both because it would’ve been too hard. I put the eldest one in a school and I’m on waiting lists for more manageable options.

Find a childminder who's doing the school run for the school the 7yo is at.
Drop him to hers at 8.30 then head off to other school.

As under 8 a cm can only have 6 under 8 and prob will have 3 under 5 so leaving 3 spaces which may be taken

But worth asking about. A cm may charge 30mins if drop off at 830

As op dh works early shift , I assume he is home earlyish and maybe op needs to find a part time evening job to cover the breakfast club fees

Or look at budget and see if can find £10pw and put in breakfast club 2 days this showing effort and then ‘only’ late 3 times a week

After reading the whole thread, have to say OP that YABU

You were offered the option of a school which could take all 3 children. You turned it down because you thought your children wouldn't be able to make local friends.

You now have 2 children at one school, and one at another. But you don't want the 7yo to go the school where the majority of your children are, as the 7yo school is better, so you aren't that interested in getting them a place.

I think from what you said that the 4yo can't go to the 7yo's school anyway as they don't have an infants (correct me if I'm wrong). So you can't move the 4yo to the 7yo's school.

You have already appealed in order to get the 10yo into the 4yo's school and got the school to go over the class size limit in order to accept them - which affects the school and other pupils even if only minimally.

You can't pay for breakfast club.

You want the schools to make allowances for your child(ren) being late.

You seem to want everything the way you want it and expect the school to make accommodations rather than you doing so. You wanted certain schools rather than the one too far away - the price you're having to pay is that they're not all in the same one. If that is something that is not practical for you then imo you shouldn't have accepted it.

It's selfish to expect your child(ren) to suffer the humiliation of being late and the school to have to put up with it because of a choice that you made. It may have been a limited choice, but it's still a choice.

You've got the LA to bend rules already and accept your year 6 child - fair enough - but now you've got the schools you wanted, it's time for you to start adapting to the system and finding a way to get all your children to school on time.

Put reception and p6 child in waiting list for other school since that’s the school you like

Take year 3 child late every day

Use this as basis for appeal for the other 2, and get welfare officer involved if you can

The school is not being unreasonable. No school would offer free childcare. You need someone else to drop y3 child off. What will you do when y6 child moves to secondary and your children will be at 3 different schools?! You need to start turning up to one of the schools earlier and talking to parents on the playground who may then offer to watch your child until they go into school while you get the others to school on time!

Appeal, take one late every day, take the one on time to the school you want them both to be in!!

As someone who's done lots of appeals I can say you won't get anywhere - it was your choice to take the schools you did.

It is the LEAs responsibility to offer places - you were not happy and they have tried to accommodate you by squeezing your Year 6 in to an already full class. (I wonder how the other parents/children feel about that - it often causes resentment when a scarce resource is made to go even further.)

It is your responsibility to get your children to school on time. You don't think you should make that much effort - that's your choice but it is your children who are paying the price. And, whether you like it or not, children do resent the interruptions/adjustments caused by regular latecomers - it's not just the school staff who have to accommodate your failures.

So shocked at the people telling you to either leave your 10 year old in charge of your 4 year old or your 7 year old alone. Do people actually do this?! I know you said its five pounds for the breakfast club at the 7 year olds school, how much is it at the other school? Our school does breakfast club for around 5 pounds but then also an 'early start' for a pound and they can just go in 15 minutes earlier than normal start. If the reception child could do something like that could it be possible? I'd say the year 6 child wouldn't need it but would be a good option for the reception child