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Original poster

For not wanting my boyfriend to cut the grass of his ex?

124 replies

Saraeast · 04/10/2018 16:00

Before I got with my boyfriend, he was married and cheated in his wife with a neighbour. He told me about it and that it started as friendship and got sexual, he told me that at one point he and her (the neighbour) were going to "make a go of it"
I have been with him for 8 months now and things seem different - he is quick to tell me to fuck off, shut up, and generally disrespectful of me. When I call him out on it his answer is to twist things around and blame me for not trusting him or being insecure. I am insecure in our relationship because I caught him out lying to me a month or so ago about where he was going - he disappeared for 6 hours and said he was going to play football with his mates. He left at 5 30 and at 2130 I was trying to call him and he wasn't answering. Then he came back at 1130pm saying he had been swimming as he needed to think. I was suspicious but trusted him. A few weeks later I find out he is messaging a woman and when I asked who it was he said "one of my customers" but had deleted all the history. He got angry with me for not trusting him. I then saw a list of women's names written in a note pad to which I was the last name on it- so I asked him what the list was - is it a list of all the people he has slept with? The "customer" he said he was texting was in this list. He then admitted to me that the night he went "swimming" he had gone to her house but nothing happened. Obviously the trust was now gone as I had exposed his lies.

In recent weeks things have been strained because he seems quick to get rid of me and doesn't seem to ever go near me - sex is one sided (on my part - he gets pleasures and then rolls over). He says it is down to stress and he doesn't know why.
I have now just got really upset because I found out he is currently at another ex's house (the one he was going to leave his wife for) and doing a lawn cut because he needs the money. I got upset and questioned his motives and his answer was to tell me to fuck off, followed by there is no trust in our relationship so just leave.
I am devastated. I love him. Am I the problem? I don't think I am but he is adamant I am being unreasonable and need to trust him.

OP posts:
valsmey · 04/10/2018 17:17

Don't spend another day with this waste of space, seriously - he's a loser, and you deserve better. Aim higher, OP. There's someone out there who is a real partner in life, and your current one needs to be binned as quickly as possible - he's a toad.

OldShuck · 04/10/2018 17:18

Dump the horrible, cheating weasel

FrustratedBeyond · 04/10/2018 17:19

If I could reach through the screen and drag you out of there, I would... And you 'not good enough for him'?? He's not good enough for you!

BunsOfAnarchy · 04/10/2018 17:20

Fuck the grass. You need to dump this arsehole

You are worth more than this OP. I hope you find the strength to leave this wasteman

SurfnTerfFantasticmissfoxy · 04/10/2018 17:23

The grass cutting isn't the issue - the fact you chose to start a relationship with a man who made quite clear to you he was a philandering dishonest cunt is the issue.

valsmey · 04/10/2018 17:24

OP, would you want a future daughter of yours to be with this scumbag as a partner? No? how about if your son was treated like this by his partner? There's your answer. You need to get rid.

Glumglowworm · 04/10/2018 17:31

After only 8 months things should still be all happy and lovely. If it’s this shit already then it’s never going to work for you.

Poocalypso · 04/10/2018 17:35

Please read your own OP out to yourself. He is not worth your attention. Yes you are the problem, for putting up with such a total waste of space. Get rid quick. You are being used. And ask yourself why you are with someone like him. You deserve so much more. X

PsychedelicSheep · 04/10/2018 17:35

Good god almighty this is a depressing read Sad

OP - I promise you that you're worth more than this! I can't think of any woman who wouldn't be.

bamboolzled · 04/10/2018 17:39

Walk away

your too good for the piece of $%^&

find someone who respects you and wants you. not the first thing he see when out of the front door

AdaColeman · 04/10/2018 17:41

I think the saddest part of this dreadful relationship is that you say
"I am terrified that I just am not good enough for him".

Get yourself away from this cheating abusive bully immediately.

Have a look at the Freedom Programme, you can do it on line.

Most importantly, start valuing yourself. If you don't value yourself no one else will ever value you.
Do you want to spend a life-time licking the boots of scumbags like this article? No, of course you don't!!

Felicitycity · 04/10/2018 17:43

Cutting his ex's lawn is the least of your problems. Sorry . you need to get rid. Best of luck.

bridgetreilly · 04/10/2018 17:43

Mowing the lawn of an ex, meh.

Treating you the way he does, with the track record he has? LTB. Sweetheart, he is not good enough for you or, indeed, any woman.

Oobis · 04/10/2018 17:48

I'm going to assume you were vulnerable when you got together if you are genuinely concerned you're not good enough for him. He is a sexual predator.
You are good enough to be treated with love and respect, to not be cheated on and to be adored. I'm sorry, but he's not doing any of those things. Please walk away before you become dependent on him and cannot. You say you love him. Are you sure it's him you love rather than the idea of being in a relationship? No relationship is better than what you have at the moment. Take some time to love yourself and he can shag whichever neighbour, wife or ex he wants without the bother of making excuses. May be worth popping to the STI clinic too.
Sorry you're in a bad place

McFugget · 04/10/2018 17:55

DonDrapersOldFashioned ~

""a list of women he’s slept with"

What adult person does that? Odd"

A person who's tested positive for an STD and therefore required to give a list of partners to the clinic so those partners are contactable?

saltandvinegarcrisps1 · 04/10/2018 17:56

HRTFT cos on the bus and nearly at my stop. I think your title is the least of your worries - is it an euphemism????

poglets · 04/10/2018 17:59

I stopped reading at 'he tells me to fuck off'.
Everything else is irrelevant. Time to part ways and find someone who treats you with respect. I mean, he isn't a very respectful or nice person is he? He cheated on his wife with a neighbor and now he's being vile to you. Get rid.

AnyFucker · 04/10/2018 18:00

What the fuck happened to you that explains why this cuntweasel is still in your life ?

Dontfeellikeamillenial · 04/10/2018 18:01

Seriously op?

Original poster
Saraeast · 04/10/2018 18:10

Thanks for all your comments I feel empowered. I do have to work on my self esteem really I do.

OP posts:
jarhead123 · 04/10/2018 18:11

Get out before it's too late. He sounds vile.

AuLoinSontVontLesNuages · 04/10/2018 18:17

You deserve better. He is not a nice person. Do not put up with this. He is showing you who he is. Do you want a lifetime of this? Get out of this relationship ASAP.

EnglishRose13 · 04/10/2018 18:21

What are you getting out of this relationship?

You need to realise you deserve better than being told to "fuck off" and being lied to.

Leave him. Work on loving yourself instead.

Belina · 04/10/2018 18:58

OP you need to leave this man

Banana8080 · 04/10/2018 19:19

He 100% had sex with women when he ‘went swimmjng’.

You are good enough to be with someone like this. Leave him.

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