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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Just been sent a photo of my mother on a donkey.

114 replies

Prettyvase · 30/09/2018 16:25

I am supposed to react haha! How great is that?! She is, after all, 79 years old.
A donkey can carry up to 100lbs or 7st but my mother is at least double that, probably more.

I don't have a great relationship with my parents. I feel appalled.

OP posts:
CantankerousCamel · 30/09/2018 17:08

This is a weird thread

Snowdrifthill · 30/09/2018 17:08

Oh that's so sad, donkeys are really mistreated in the name of tourism and "entertainment". This is one of the reasons I donate to an overseas donkey charity.

BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 30/09/2018 17:12

I would reply "what an ass!" and let them take whatever they want from the comment

Lilyhatesjaz · 30/09/2018 17:13

40 years ago donkey derbys were very popular fund raisers they used to get the local kids including me to ride them, there was a very strict weight limit so the majority of the riders were under 10 quite a lot fell off I don't think it would pass health and safety regulations these days.

Fontrieu · 30/09/2018 17:15

If you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all.
It will only end in a fallout.
I would say something to her face after they get back about the way donkeys are exploited and mistreated as a conversation rather than an attack.

HoleyCoMoley · 30/09/2018 17:15

Id reply saying that its cruel, poor donkey having to carry anyone really should be banned, they have a miserable life just for the sake of lazy tourists. Id be really disappointed if anyone I knwe did this.

Branleuse · 30/09/2018 17:16

id reply Jeez, that donkey is not having a good day

Thehop · 30/09/2018 17:16

Send back

“Poor donkey. Please see attached link regarding abuse of animals for tourists in that country”

PARunnerGirl · 30/09/2018 17:17

Petra...?

They have signs everywhere asking tourists to report mistreatment of animals but there was no way I was paying to support that industry while I was there. Donkeys, camels and horses. It’s hard, because the guys are trying to make a living and are very poor, but it’s not right Sad

PARunnerGirl · 30/09/2018 17:17

But I’d probably just reply, hope you’re having a nice holiday. And not mention the donkey.

XiCi · 30/09/2018 17:18

What should you say? How about nothing.
She's an 80 year old woman on holiday, what good can come of you giving her a load of shit over something that was probably an organised event by the tour operator. You might not agree with it but voicing that to your elderly mum when relations are already strained is not going to achieve anything.

Waddsup12 · 30/09/2018 17:20

I was in Majorca years ago and there was a horse pulling a carriage and now I'm older I realise it was desperate for water and ill-treated. I still feel bad I didn't do anything at the time. I hate seeing working horses & would be appalled by the donkey pic now.

Aquamarine1029 · 30/09/2018 17:20

I would ask why is she trying to kill the poor donkey.

peachgreen · 30/09/2018 17:23

Well, this thread is a bit unpleasant.

a) as you clearly know, nobody should be riding donkeys regardless of their size so mentioning her weight was irrelevant and just a way of getting a dig in

b) not everyone knows that the donkey industry is exploitative and cruel, especially those brought up in the generation where it was totally normal - she's presumably not doing it purposefully to be unkind, she just doesn't know

Personally I'd say nothing and then mention it to her in person when she gets home. Or just send her a link - "glad you're having a nice time Mum but have you read this about donkey rides? It's really horrible for the poor donkeys"

MyBrexitGoesOnHoliday · 30/09/2018 17:24

What’s the issue wth a 79yo ridding a donkey?
Would you laugh the same if she was on a horse? (Fwiw my MIL is a similar age and still has a horse and rides regularly)

UnicornSparkles1 · 30/09/2018 17:26

Send back exactly what we're all thinking.

"Poor donkey."

Lweji · 30/09/2018 17:26

100lbs is only about 50Kg.

Surely donkeys everywhere are carry a lot more than that, unless they carry only children (and people more or less like me).

It really puts a slant on that old story of the old man, the boy and the donkey, doesn't it? Supposedly, it was only unreasonable for both the man and the boy to ride the donkey. Not just the man, who'd weigh well over 100lbs.

MyBrexitGoesOnHoliday · 30/09/2018 17:26

peach I have to say I’ve never heard that no one was supposed to ride a donkey or that the donkey industry is exploitative.
For me a donkey is the ones you see in the beach in the uk on a very regular basis (is that exploitative) or the animals used to carry very heavy loads in Africa, the ME etc... (aka they w8n t be exploited more than they wouod ‘normally’ be exceptbthatbthey wouod probably help their owners earn more money that way)

Lweji · 30/09/2018 17:28

Christ rode a donkey, FGS.

Grin
NerrSnerr · 30/09/2018 17:34

I just wouldn't say anything.

florenceheadache · 30/09/2018 17:37

She’s 79 and up on a something, good for her. I hope she’s having a nice vacation.

Lynne1Cat · 30/09/2018 17:39

The poor donkey. Tell her to get her fat fucking arse off it

CrunchieFriday · 30/09/2018 17:39

@ peachgreen why would you say nobody should be riding donkeys? Why not?

My DD has been on donkey rides. I have owned horses for 25 years and a quick glance showed that the donkeys were in good health, with well cared -for feet, their saddles fitted correctly etc The lady offering the rides rested her donkeys frequently and they were obviously much loved.

CantankerousCamel · 30/09/2018 17:41

In what reality is 100lbs fat?

SouthWestmom · 30/09/2018 17:47

It's not but op says her mum is double that, so more like 14 stone?