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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have been annoyed in the hairdressers?

235 replies

LargeGlassOfPepsi · 29/09/2018 19:59

I had a hair appointment today. I turned up at 12 really looking forward to having my hair done and reading while my colour was put on. My hair takes 4 hours to do and I enjoy having a few coffees, reading and chatting to the hairdresser. I turned up and noticed the pram then the toddler running around while the hairdressers were trying their best to dodge her.

After being sat next to the parent I asked to be moved to another chair. The baby was 5 months old (mum repeated this numerous times), then there was the "Do you need your lunch, can you remove my gown otherwise he'll suffocate when I feed him and we don't want that do we?" "Oh look here's Sophie giraffe" then fucking Sophie giraffe was squeaked."My nipples must be elastic as you're just chewing on them." Then to the toddler "oh look at what that lady is having done, look over there that lady is having her hair washed, oh look that lady is having purple in her hair"

She was there 3 and a half hours. The above went on for the whole time mum was there then a hairdresser was asked to hold the baby while she had her hair rinsed.

I appreciate people need their hair done but FFS some of us want to relax and have our hair done in peace.

OP posts:
butlerswharf · 29/09/2018 22:09

It really wouldn't annoy me that much. Definitely not enough to start a thread about it. It's just a baby.

Heartofglass12345 · 29/09/2018 22:11

She may have had no choice.... to spend 3 hours in the hairdresser Grin someone forced her there did they? I have a 2 and 5 year old and would never take them, it's a dangerous place! What if they got burnt, or bumped into a hairdresser cutting your hair with sharp scissors?! I agree with you. I wouldn't have had a problem with the baby at all, but not young kids, it's not the place for them!

PecanPastry · 29/09/2018 22:15

I hear you OP!

Totally relate to this, it's like when you get that rare 'date night' or time out to yourself, then go for your meal/afternoon tea/wedding invite that you totally understand that kids aren't invited to "per se" and then are imevitably sat next to, or within close proximity to, other people's children, who have that uncanny knack to hone in on people who love kids, and stare you out with gurgles and slobbery smiles......

I love going to the hairdressers, it feels very self indulgent, someone else makes my coffee, and I get to read trashy magazines, I'm there for me, and me only, one of those rare occurrences Mir not the only one, where it's just al about me!

Original poster
LargeGlassOfPepsi · 29/09/2018 22:15

For those who don't find going to the hairdresser relaxing, well, everyone is different but I really enjoy going to get my hair done. I do not expect unruly children to be running around a hair salon while their parent/carer sits and does nothing to control them. It's NOT a playground for children and as I've said in a previous post there are many dangers around for them.

I've sent an email to the salon tonight pointing out the health and safety concerns of having children running around. Thank you to the poster who suggested that.

To the people who think it's acceptable to take toddlers along to a hair appointment that is hours long I think you're incredibly selfish. It's not just selfish to expect young children to wait around while you have your hair done, it's also very selfish expecting other people to put up with them being bored. Hairdressers are NOT childminders.

OP posts:
PecanPastry · 29/09/2018 22:17

....consequently, I think the acronym FFS was created for instances like this....

FruHagen · 29/09/2018 22:17

Maybe your "me time" is just "got to get my hair done" for other people.

Plenty of opportunity for you in the future to expand what many see as a perfunctory service into the deep bath experience.

You'll be alright. Kids live in the world too.

PecanPastry · 29/09/2018 22:18

Well said OP - hear, hear! :)

StitchingMoss · 29/09/2018 22:36

FruHagan, what a stupid thing to say! So kids should be allowed anywhere then? Bars? Pubs? Adult films?

Of course a salon isn't an appropriate or safe place for children. I've had a mobile hairdresser since the kids came along, not ideal but it is what it is. One day I'll get back to a salon!

The sense of entitlement is breathtaking!

ManicUnicorn · 29/09/2018 22:44

YANBU OP. Why on earth wouldn't you take a child to the hairdressers with you? It's selfish and entitled. Get a mobile hairdresser instead.

notangelinajolie · 29/09/2018 22:46

Don't agree that the woman had a choice to take her child/baby to the hairdressers. Of course she did! Since when is going to the hairdressers compulsory? Could she not have found a mobile hairdresser to come to her house and do her hair?

Guessing that by the length of time she was in the salon she was not having a simple cut and blow. I'm presuming she was having highlights or some such treatment that would take time - how exactly was the woman going to look after her kids during that time. Totally irresponsible of her to assume that the hairdressers would be a free creche.

notangelinajolie · 29/09/2018 22:47
  • didn't
Cardiganandcuppa · 29/09/2018 22:49

I havent had my hair done in 18 months now. We moved away and I don’t have any childcare.
It was short; now it’s halfway down my back and i just look after it.

No way would I take my young kids to a 3+ hour hair appt.

AtlasQueen · 29/09/2018 22:52

Yanbu. I’d be disappointed by this too as the hairdresser is a rare treat

GreenTulips · 29/09/2018 22:57

I hate going to the hairdressers. I don't find it enjoyable or relaxing.

Adding toddlers would make it worse

Maybe you should have the mobile hairdresser OP then you could enjoy your own environment without added stress

AromaticSpices · 29/09/2018 23:01

Ridiculous- quite selfish of the woman. My time in a hairdresser is precious relaxing time.

When my children were small I went back to my natural colour, precisely so that I wouldn't need six weekly highlighting appointments which would take around 4-5 hours a time. Because I couldn't leave my breastfed babies for that long and it was a waste of virtually a quarter of the weekend when my husband was home. I never considered it an option to bring a toddler and a baby.

When you're a parent you adjust your activities and behaviour accordingly. To give her the benefit of the doubt, perhaps her childcare fell through at the last minute... but if it was me I'd have spent less time talking about my elastic nipples and more time apologising for the inconvenience caused by childcare letdown...

GinPink · 29/09/2018 23:03

I have 3 young kids aged 6 months to 5 years. I wouldn't dream of taking them to a long hair appointment for this reason. YANBU, she was being selfish.

MarthasGinYard · 29/09/2018 23:07

'To the people who think it's acceptable to take toddlers along to a hair appointment that is hours long I think you're incredibly selfish. It's not just selfish to expect young children to wait around while you have your hair done, it's also very selfish expecting other people to put up with them being bored. Hairdressers are NOT childminders.'

I agree with this Op

I'd have been fed up with all this going on for hours

nearlythesummer · 29/09/2018 23:10

I really hate having any treatment with my dc about! Perhaps you could have suggested a mobile hairdresser to her-much easier. It would have been better if it wasn't so long too!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 29/09/2018 23:26

To the posters who say ‘it’s a public space - do you expect people with kids to stay at home and never set foot out?’ - my answer would be that, of course I don’t expect you to stay indoors and never take your children out in public.

BUT - I do expect you to be aware of what constitutes acceptable behaviour in the places you go, and to either do your best to get your children to behave as well as they can, or to accept that there are some places that just aren’t child friendly, and to avoid these places if possible.

I don’t expect perfection of any child or parent - I had three energetic boys, and I know how hard it can be, to make sure they don’t shave badly or annoy other people - and I am sure we didn’t get it right all the time.

But we did try, and so did they - but sadly there are some parents (not many) who do the sum total of bugger-all to get their children to behave reasonably well, and it is not unreasonable to be irked when you meet these parents and their children.

LordOfTheFleas · 29/09/2018 23:30

I haven't had my haircut for over a year and need to go, currently trying to see when I can get my busy and not local DM to spare a day and come to watch my DC for an hour. It would never occur to me to take a toddler with me, that's incredibly rude and surely dangerous!
She can't have "needed" to be there for 3 hours either, it was obviously a choice.
I'm all for taking my toddler to supermarkets, restaurants etc (behaviour permitting) but some places like the salon or the cinema are out for a few years.
You make the decision to have children and you make sacrifices accordingly.

thewinehasgonetomyhead · 29/09/2018 23:32

I agree OP. I went to get my nails done a few weeks ago, leaving DD1 Andy DD2 at home (3 yrs and 5 months) at home with DH. I was looking forward to a nice relax but was subjected to listening to bloody Thomas and friends on someone’s iPhone which their kid was watching whilst their mum got her nails done. I’d just come from all that to relax!

Popc0rn · 29/09/2018 23:37

YADNBU.

I don't want to have my hair done in a creche. Get a baby sitter or find a mobile hairdresser.

CSIblonde · 29/09/2018 23:45

Meh. Where I go is small & a toddler & baby wouldn't bother me. They usually play games on mums mobile, there are non noisy toys in the corner & if they get upset staff usually offer them a lolly or carton of drink: & order is restored.

slithytove · 29/09/2018 23:45

I recently had to take my 4 year old DD with me (waited 7 weeks for an appointment and my childcare fell through). I would have cancelled but it was about an hour before the appointment plus it really needed doing. I took DD and an iPad and snacks and crossed my fingers, and she was good as gold sat in the waiting area (metre away from my chair). I was lucky they facilitated us but I would never do it had it been politely avoidable. I only get my hair done once a year as it is.

They were lovely and gave her a trim while I was there - her first!

What you describe OP is shocking and I would never do it - I only took DD knowing she can behave and sit nicely for 2 hours.

Popc0rn · 29/09/2018 23:47

@Brummiegirl15

I don't think mothers should never leave the house at all, but I do think certain places are unsuitable to take crying babies and young toddlers, either for safety reasons or just cos other people's kids can be really annoying Grin. No go places for babies/toddlers for me are:

  • The hairdressers (unless they are actually getting their own hair cut)
  • The gym
  • The cinema (unless it is a kids film - when I went to see the last Star Wars film at the cinema on a Saturday night, there was a couple with a crying baby who stayed in for about 20 minutes before the woman left with the baby while the guy stayed Hmm).
  • Restaurants after 8pm