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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think there should be an approval process to allow parents to HE?

407 replies

abacucat · 29/09/2018 13:54

Children's education matters, it is incredibly important and affects the rest of their life. I think it is fine for parents to Home Educate, but I think there should be an approval process before parents can HE. This will check the parents are actually capable of doing this.

OP posts:
Thesearmsofmine · 29/09/2018 14:17

They aren’t involved at lower levels because they are deemed capable of being parents.

If you have concerns about a childs education you can report this to the local authority. If the parents refuse to prove an education is taking place the LEA can take them to court and a SAO can be issued.

TeenTimesTwo · 29/09/2018 14:17

I think registration is better than up front approval, as the education matters not the person providing it.

So register for Home Ed. checks can then be made. if the LA thinks the child is not receiving an education they can prosecute or whatever. All children registered means no flying under the radar.

Up front approval means you can't pull your child out of school for e.g. bullying without being registered first. It would mean quite possibly a set of MC hoops to jump through.

Whereas registration followed up by checks at 3months, 6 months, 1 year, 2 years, 4 years (or at ages 4, 5, 7, 11, 14, ..) seems more reasonable.

LilQueenie · 29/09/2018 14:18

everyone I know who home educates prepares a basic outline of activity to be shown to the LA once a year. It is updated and shown every year to show what the children are doing and progressing.

HappeeAgain · 29/09/2018 14:19

I disagree

HE shouldn’t be made harder. I’ll be HE my youngest after going through hell with the school system and I feel it’s in my child’s best interests to never enter the system at all

hooveringhamabeads · 29/09/2018 14:21

I agree. My dd (14) is HE but not out of choice. She left school because she couldn’t cope with it because of SEN. According to a friend who works in education, when you electively Home educate, the school they are leaving have to tick a box to say whether in their opinion the parent is up to it.

I guess they ticked yes because I have a first class degree and can talk the talk, so other than one quick phone call I’ve never had any hassle. But in reality I’m really struggling. I have ME, I’m a lone parent and I have to earn money. I also have another child. I am completely overwhelmed by it all and really struggling. When I only get a couple of hours a day at best with enough energy to do stuff, this is all too much.

But what am I supposed to do? She couldn’t cope with school and out of fear for her own rapidly plummeting MH I was backed into a corner and had to take her out. It’s certainly not what I’d have chosen.

Wannabeyorkshirelass · 29/09/2018 14:23

I couldn't agree more. I think we are far too focused in this country on 'parents rights' and not nearly as interested in the rights of the child. I also think beyond a certain age children should be allowed to choose if they go to school (though I recognise that is problematic because a Home Educator I know spends all year telling her children bad things about school and then makes a big deal of officially asking them once a year if they would prefer Mummy or school. Hmm And then feels vindicated that her children are 'choosing' HE.

The only people I know who feel Home Education is going well are current or past Home Educators. I'm yet to meet anyone who says they were home educated and loved it and have gone on to be successful.

NotANotMan · 29/09/2018 14:24

People who are keeping their children home out of basic neglect should be on SS's radar for other reasons

How would social services know they were neglecting them? That's the whole bloody point.

Home education is potentially absolutely fine but in most cases I know of it's either; lazy, authority averse parents who are just as lazy at educating and believe that twice weekly drama clubs and free access to the internet is an education, or parents who have given up trying to get their school refuses to school.

Home education is a right. But the LEA should have the right to inspect the education that children get and to veto the right if it's not good enough.

Thesearmsofmine · 29/09/2018 14:25

@hooveringhamabeads

Are you in touch with other local HE families? There are also groups on Facebook aimed at those home edding teens and also those home edding children with SEN, it might help to chat with others in the same situation.

Veganfortheanimals · 29/09/2018 14:26

I'm home educating...and I completely agree ...the Lea know we are home educating and still haven't got in touch to make sure he is actually learning anything...if you have nothing to hide then there is no reason to mind a check up from lea.

AlphaBravo · 29/09/2018 14:26

OP... HE is more about facilitating, not directly teaching. HE parents aren't always the teacher, they have tutors or the kids go to HE groups and sessions.

So YABU, dense and terribly ignorant.

RadicalUnspooler · 29/09/2018 14:27

Think about what you are suggesting.

Requiring a license to make a parenting decision.

Scary as hell. Is that REALLY the precedent you want to set?

"First they came for the..."

While you're at it, why not require state approval to:

become a parent

have additional children

select their schools and substitute carers

etc

Now, I have changed my mind in recent years and am now in favour of mandatory registration, with cross-checks to highlight safeguarding concerns.

However, YABVU IMO.

Jamieandwordswo · 29/09/2018 14:27

The LEA already has the right to inspect.

NotANotMan · 29/09/2018 14:28

The LEA already has the right to inspect

But they have no powers to veto or to insist on inspection if the parents don't comply

Jamieandwordswo · 29/09/2018 14:28

They can go to court.

NotANotMan · 29/09/2018 14:28

Requiring a license to make a parenting decision

In this country we acknowledge that children have the right to an education; whether they get that or not is NOT a parenting decision

NotANotMan · 29/09/2018 14:29

They can go to court

For home educating? Doesn't happen.

TwistedStitch · 29/09/2018 14:30

How would that work OP? When I withdrew my child from school as an emergency intervention because of how much he was being damaged, bullied, his additional needs not being met- the same LA who repeatedly let my child down can assess if I'm up for the job? Would I have to keep sending him there until I passed their test? I have A Levels but no degree, I've had PND and suffer from anxiety. Would I fail or pass?

FWIW I engage with the LA and they are very happy with the education I provide for my child. I have no issue with some oversight and intervention if a child is being failed. But people with their own prejudices or agendas making a subjective judgement about whether a parent is allowed to exercise their legal right to remove their child from a system that regularly fails children is not something I support.

InertPotato · 29/09/2018 14:30

How would social services know they were neglecting them? That's the whole bloody point.

Well, I guess that's up to the surrounding community to keep an eye on things.

Parents have freedom to make all sorts of decisions that are not in the best interest of their children. Doesn't mean we resort to government agents knocking on doors demanding certain kinds of paperwork with the threat of removal.

HappeeAgain · 29/09/2018 14:33

There’s an unhealthy connection between HE and neglect/abuse
These things don’t just happen during the hours of 9-3 and it’s wrong to have a blanket assumption of families who HE. There’s almost a stigma attached to it

CarolDanvers · 29/09/2018 14:34

Schools aren’t fit for purpose for some kids especially those with SEN. My local LA practically threw a party when I decided to home ed, they could barely hide their delight. They were totally unable to provide a setting for my child and he eventually injured in their care. No way on earth would I accept having to jump through hoops to home educate after that level of failure utter incompetence.

VladmirsPoutine · 29/09/2018 14:34

I agree with the sentiment of the idea rather than the method you've suggested. An approval process would cause more problems than it would resolve. However, registration and regular cross-checks would not be remiss.

RadicalUnspooler · 29/09/2018 14:39

In this country we acknowledge that children have the right to an education; whether they get that or not is NOT a parenting decision

Whether they get that or not can only be assessed after the decision to home educate, or school, has been made. Not before.

Basecamp65 · 29/09/2018 14:39

Why does this suddenly matter when a child is 5. All the most important learning occurs before this age.

Every half decent parent educates their children at home. Most choose to send their children to school as well - some don't.

So what you actually want is approval to parent.

One of the things you learn very quickly when you actually home educate (as opposed to imagining what you think HE is all about) is that everything you thought and believe about educating children is actually rubbish. Many adults who were formally HE are now doing masters and doctorates and have never sat a GCSE exam in their lives. Many have never seen a reading scheme or done a workbook. But have several degrees- even more successfully run their own business without a single qualification to their names.

I have not got a clue how to do quadratic equations but if our children ever needs to know how - or anything else they might want to learn - we will learn together. How may you ask? Well i could go to one of the millions of videos on youtube or one of the thousands of book/websites or one of the hundreds of distance learning courses or one of the dozens of HE GCSE maths tutor groups around or I may even employ a tutor. Or i can just ask my brother who has a degree in higher maths.

When I read comments like this I have to wonder what goes on in people's heads!!! What do they do when they need to learn something??? Do they really believe HE is sitting at the kitchen table with a workbook and the whole of the world's resources is just ignored.

Believe it or not nothing learned during 5 - 16 education is rocket science or brain surgery - that I accept will need experts.

TwistedStitch · 29/09/2018 14:41

Spot on CarolDanvers, that is also my experience and that of many other parents in my local home ed community.

gottastopeatingchocolate · 29/09/2018 14:41

I Home Educate - but my child will be going in to mainstream education at some point in the future.
I voluntarily sent in an education report to the Elective Home Education department of the LA (every LA has one). I received a response that my education was satisfactory and they would be in touch in 12 months.

This is enough, I feel. If there were any issues they would ask for more information, suggest a meeting or a home visit. In cases where the LA has concerns there are processes which can lead to either a more appropriate education at home or a School Attendance Order.

Home Education is getting a bad press at the moment. And there are some comments on this thread that I find a little clumsy, to say the least. But then most threads on MN have some fairly strong voices that speak with confidence on something they really don't have much knowledge of, so I guess I am just sensitive to this one as it affects me.