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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think she's being a right CF?

503 replies

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 13:50

A bit of background first, and I'll try my best to give all the relevant information, but as I don't know much about the workings of the system I'm unsure what I need to include.

My partner split with his wife 3 years ago after 13 years together and 7 years of marriage. They have an 11 year old child together. Their marriage ended very acrimoniously after a series of infidelities on her part.
When they separated he immediately moved out of the family home with just his personal belongings and stayed with his parents until he could find a rental place. Since leaving he has paid her child maintenance by private agreement on a weekly basis.

She has today received a letter from HRMC saying she needs to repay tens of thousands of pounds in overpaid tax credits. The tax credits were paid to her during the time that he had left the family home. (He's always worked full time. When he left she went on to benefits. She hasn't worked in 13 years apparently).
The notice says that if she claimed as a couple then both parties must repay, so she called him today and said he's liable for half. His answer was... but how can I be? I have receipts for rent paid to my own house. I didn't benefit from this overpayment so why should I pay half back?
We're both so confused. What does he do now? I've told him to call HRMC but he's still smarting from the phone call from his ex wife. We're these benefits claimed fraudulently? And is he liable to repay half as she insists?
Thank you for any help or advice.

OP posts:
ChesterCake · 17/09/2018 13:52

Surely they weren’t claiming as a couple during that time as he had left the family home?

Twotailed · 17/09/2018 13:53

He definitely needs to speak to HMRC, they are the only ones who can advise.

Jumpsuitcoverme · 17/09/2018 13:54

Are you saying she fruadently claimed tax credits in his name as part of a joint claim despite him having left the family home?

UpstartCrow · 17/09/2018 13:55

You need a solicitor. She claimed the benefits, she signed for them, I don't see how he can be liable.
But 'UpstartCrow said on the internet' isn't going to cut it.

WorraLiberty · 17/09/2018 13:55

I've told him to call HRMC but he's still smarting from the phone call from his ex wife.

Well asking Mumsnet isn't going to help gather the facts

If he doesn't want to make the phone call just yet, he won't know whether he has to pay or not.

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2018 13:55

No I don't think he is liable, if he can prove they were separated at the time of her claiming and it was her who fraudulently claimed without his involvement,

But did she claim as a couple?

She needs to speak to hmrc, but this is hers to sort out. Ultimately if he gets drawn in, he may need to seek legal advice.

Cloudyapples · 17/09/2018 13:56

It says ‘IF she claimed as a couple’ Did sh claim as a couple though? If she had wouldn’t the letter be addressed to him too? I’d be asking for a copy of it

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 13:58

She screenshot him a copy and sent it to him. He forwarded to me. It's addressed to her only.

OP posts:
Angrybird345 · 17/09/2018 13:58

He needs to speak to Harv and make sure he’s not implicated by the ex.

dementedpixie · 17/09/2018 13:58

If she did the claim then how is he liable if they weren't a couple?

Angrybird345 · 17/09/2018 13:58

Harv - HMRC

SpoonBlender · 17/09/2018 13:58

Call HMRC. They'll know if it was claimed as a couple.

If it was and DP wasn't a signatory to it, she's probably liable for fraud if DP cares to push it.

If it wasn't, DP isn't liable.

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 14:00

She says he applied for a loan against the family address when he was living with his parents. HRMC know this apparently.
It took a few minutes of stony faced silence, but he admits he did this. To buy a car to get to work because he left the family car for her. He didn't want to apply against his mum and dad's address, and as he didn't have his own residence he used his old one. 🙈

OP posts:
UpstartCrow · 17/09/2018 14:02

Get legal advice asap.

SpoonBlender · 17/09/2018 14:03

A loan is nothing to do with tax credits though. Should be entirely independent and doesn't matter at all.

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 14:03

He didn't sign anything and didn't know or ask her anything relating to benefits. He just paid his maintenance. A year after he left she got a new partner who runs his own business. He moved in almost immediately.
Sorry for the drip feed... told you I didn't know what info was relevant. I have no idea how this stuff works.

OP posts:
ismellsnow · 17/09/2018 14:04

If they had a joint claim, they are both liable for any overpayment. Did he contact HMRC when he left the family home to advise that they were no longer a couple?

dementedpixie · 17/09/2018 14:04

A loan application in his name has nothing to do with tax credits that she claimed

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 14:05

Thought of something else. She did ask him weeks ago if he would sign a letter if she drew it up. She told him she was being investigated for benefit fraud and it was all his fault because of the loan debacle.
He said he wouldn't sign anything that wasn't the truth.

OP posts:
Spacezombies · 17/09/2018 14:05

She's probably claimed as a single parent (or she wouldn't have got as much) but now that she's being asked to repay, she's clinging onto anything that means she doesn't need to pay it all. The letter said "if you claimed as a couple" and she's just decided that she will tell her ex husband that he needs to help her and is going to use that line over and over, despite it not being a couples claim.

He needs to ask her for a copy if her awards notices. If his name is on there then it's fraud and he needs to take appropriate steps. If his name is not on it, then just ignore. If she brings it up then he simply says "your finances are nothing to do with me. I'm not discussing them with you."

Do not engage with her.

CrochetBelle · 17/09/2018 14:05

So they weren't claiming tax credits as a couple before they separated? She only put in a claim when he left?

dementedpixie · 17/09/2018 14:06

Did they have a joint tax credit claim before he moved out? If so, it should have been changed when he moved out. The letter being in her name only suggests it was a sole claim though

itchybumhole · 17/09/2018 14:08

When they lived together they only claimed child benefit from what he tells me.

OP posts:
flamingofridays · 17/09/2018 14:08

tell him to call HMRC - they will probably ask for proof he wasn't living there, I cant see how he can be liable to be honest.

Bluntness100 · 17/09/2018 14:08

You're saying he did sign?

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