To feel put off my husbands new beard

[Pineapplepassion]

Ok, I know this is a very minor problem, very first world but it's having a big impact on my relationship. I just need some opinions and advice to help me as I know it's unreasonable.
My husband grew a beard while we were apart, due to work for a couple of weeks.
I really detest it, it scratches me when we kiss and I don't fancy him or want him near me because it looks like my Dad and brothers beards and it feels so weird.
He loves it, I can't ask him to shave it off as that would be unreasonable, I wouldn't want him pushing an opinion on me regarding my hair or appearance, but I hate it so much, it's affecting our relationship.
Any ideas to help me get used to it?

I feel your pain. DH has just grown a hideous moustache and I feel exactly the same about it! No solutions yet so I'm watching your thread with interest 🙏🏼

He is also working away but seeing it on FaceTime has been hard enough 🙈

I'd forgotten about it as it was more like three day old stubble when he left. Now it's full on grizzly and it's so awful.

Start referring to it as face pubes.

I feel exactly the same way. Thankfully my other half has been kind and not grown one for that reason.

Haha I was the same when mine shaved his beard off temporarily. He just didn’t look like himself, plus he looked really young which was unnerving! I couldn’t wait till it grew back and he hasn’t shaved it off again (or ever, if I get my way!)

Mine did the same! He was on holiday for a week with our sons then away for work. When he came home he was really proud of it! The next day I said sorry I don't like your beard and I don't want to kiss you with it on your face and he shaved it off pronto!

I would tell him! My DH knows that a beard is out of the question, but if he didn't, I would set him straight pronto.

I told mine that his one stunk of cheese!! He shaved it off straight away!!!

Beard oil. It'll soften that bad boy up and makes it smell nice. I detested the beard initially but after nearly 10 months of him growing it I've come to accept it.

Accept. Not like mind.

DH has one and I fucking hate it. And he spends ages pissing about with it too, and fiddling mindlessly with it.

I have always, right from the off, been very clear about how much I hate beards, and he still grew it. And wonders why I hate kissing him.

Can you tell it’s a sore point?

Well my EXH grew a huge beard over time, I hated it, told him I hated it, he was always clean shaven head and face! We were going through a rough patch and I had lost 3.5 stone and think he did it to spite me!
There were lots of other problems but eventually I thought it was a total lack of respect...!
He didn't even suit it!
Anyway he is my ex now and I haven't looked back!

YANBU. I wouldn't want to kiss one. And the thought of rubbing oil in it is

I grew a beard when I was 18 and liked it. I married with a beard and years later divorced with a beard and four adult children.
Age 66 I met a new woman and she got a rash from my beard when we kissed.
I shaved and 15 years later we are still together, no beard, no rash and I love her.

To me there was no decision, I loved her, she disliked my beard, good bye beard as I know what matters to me.

You can only insist he keeps it a certain way, if you're just as happy for him to dictate some of your body hair choices.

Could you imagine the uproar if a guy came on saying his wife won't cut her hair? I hardly think you'd have suggestions like "tell her it smells of fish"

I do think you can express your dislike, and share your opinion if he asks. Suggest beard oil, buy him a little set with scissors etc. You'll get used to it over time. Chances are he'll shave it himself when he's bored, or he decides it looks scraggly.

You need to be honest. Say you don't really like it and it's putting you off him.

BUT you then need to be prepared if he says something similar about your hairy legs, fanjo, top lip, new top, or whatever some day and suck it up because it cuts both ways.

DP had a beard before we met. I have photographic evidence to prove it really did not suit him. He was clean shaven when we met and he knows I prefer clean shaven. However, he decided last Christmas he was going to revert back to having a beard. That's fine, his body, his choice.

My choice was to put him on rations... he was back to been clean shaven in 5 days 🤣.

I'm going to keep quiet for a couple more days, I just can't fully express how much I dislike it. It's his face and his choice which I respect, I do, but it's so ewww yuck.
Not sure oil would help, of course it will with the scratchy part, but unless it has the same properties as Harry Potter's invisibility cloak which is the real Issue, no chance.

Also it's same shape and colouring as my Dad and my brother it's awful.

DH grew a beard a few years ago, around the same time as he lost a couple of stone. I was a bit 'hmmm' initially but it actually suits him.
Take years off him too.
Give it a couple of weeks and see if it grows on you?

Not literally obviously!

can you tell him that while its his face and he obviously has the right to have it how he likes, you actually dont fancy him like that as much and it adds years to him

Just tell him unfortunately you can't imagine having sex with a df look- alike.
Bet it's gone by tomorrow...

I did mention how scratchy it is and I don't want to kiss him, he does think I will get used to it as apparently everybody else thinks it's amazing.