To be miffed that my "friend" refuses to call me by my name

[boterbier]

Disclaimer: I've got a fairly common, easy-to-pronounce name so it isn't a case of this individual being incapable of saying it or anything like that.

As it goes, said "friend" thinks my name is too feminine for me (bloody ridiculous) and has resorted to calling me either by my last name (weird) or a portmanteau of my first/last name (even weirder especially seeing as how this new creation is homophonous with my ex's name).

Told her to cut it out multiple times and all I get is a smug "trust me this suits you way better you'll see"!

AIB petty or is she being a soggy nugget?

[LemurintheSun]

A colleague at work started putting "The" in front of my name. His name was John. Big mistake.

[CantGetDecentNickname]

I would correct her gently every time with a simple “It’s xxx”. Let her have her rant about it not suiting you or whatever, don’t engage with this but change the subject to the weather or another boring or polite conversation ( Grey rock technique) and next time repeat “It’s xxx”. Do it nicely but persist.

If it is a class you should ideally do it in front of others because that will really put a spanner in the works for her as everyone will see her for the twat she is and she will know it too.

This. The ideal time to tackle her is in front of the group. Along with lines (in a projected voice so others can’t help but hear) such as “My name is X. I find you very rude in repeatedly refusing to call me by my name and must therefore ask you not to speak to me unless you can use my correct name” or simply “...ask you not to speak to me again.” You should only need to do this once provided you sound loud and confident- not angry.

You can also arrive slightly late to your group and sit away for her and talk to others instead. Please don’t engage in name calling as that is letting her dictate your behaviour as well as your name! Please let us know how you get on.

[roundturnandtwohalfhitches]

I'd set my ringtone to the Ting Tings - 'That's not my name' and get people to phone me when she's there.

[Bashun]

Spot the dog for her????!!!??, what does that mean?

[MumW]

I'm also very reluctant to be too harsh on this woman because everyone is here to relax before/after work and any drama between us two would inevitably affect the group "mood".
But she is affecting your mood and you've as much right to get a relaxing experience. Bullies rely on the fact that most people don't want to cause a scene. Could you talk to the instructor? After all, it's their responsibility to ensure everyone has a good experience of the class which you are clearly not. If anything, I think this stupid cow should be asked to leave.

As an aside, I favour calling her Bertha. Conjures up big, fat elephant for me.

[CoraPirbright]

Any update OP? What tack have you decided to take with this horrible bully?

[PenguinBollard]

I'm torn between

"If we're calling people by names that suit people, can I call you Adolf? As you seem to be determined to categorise and hurt people."

Or the more mature

"Rightly or wrongly, you are really upsetting me by calling me XXXX. Please call me by my real name. In the nicest way, I find it incredibly offensive that you insist on something you know makes me uncomfortable."

Or just tell Adolf to jog on

[whatwouldkeithRichardsdo2]

Never respond. Totally ignore her. It will stop.