To be miffed that my "friend" refuses to call me by my name

[boterbier]

Disclaimer: I've got a fairly common, easy-to-pronounce name so it isn't a case of this individual being incapable of saying it or anything like that.

As it goes, said "friend" thinks my name is too feminine for me (bloody ridiculous) and has resorted to calling me either by my last name (weird) or a portmanteau of my first/last name (even weirder especially seeing as how this new creation is homophonous with my ex's name).

Told her to cut it out multiple times and all I get is a smug "trust me this suits you way better you'll see"!

AIB petty or is she being a soggy nugget?

[LeftRightCentre]

I wouldn't respond to her at all and would report her to the manager. She's bullying. At a push her name would be Ethelburga from now on.

[NonaGrey]

I’m assuming you see her at the school gate?

You don’t have to talk to her though. Just stand apart, talk to someone else.

Telling your name doesn’t suit you and refusing to use it is well beyond the bounds of acceptable behaviour in a vague acquaintance let alone some that is supposed to be a friend.

I’d give her a final warning then cut her dead until an apology is forthcoming.

[CoraPirbright]

Stupid cow!! That’s so rude. Would make my blood boil too - who the hell does she think she is? Call her Brian.

[WhateverHappenedToTheHeatwave]

My friend constantly misspelled or mispronounced my dcs name. Its an easy name and i spoke to her about it but she laughed it off. So the next times she did it, i did the same to hers. Nothing more was said, she began saying it properly. No clue why she would do that in the first place but it really pissed me off.

I'd do the same to your person.

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

Is it the school gate, op? . Why are you not just walking away when this clown starts on you?
If you passively stand there and take it, she’ll continue to beat the last ounce out of her “joke”.
Turn your back on her at the very least, ffs.

[Mugglemom]

Soggy nugget.

Start calling her that.

[llangennith]

She's a very rude woman!

[boterbier]

Why do you have to see her?

Unfortunately, we're part of the same cycling/yoga club. Aside from her, everyone's absolutely lovely and the timing's great for me so I think it'd be a waste to quit just because of one person. I'm also very reluctant to be too harsh on this woman because everyone is here to relax before/after work and any drama between us two would inevitably affect the group "mood".

Have you changed your name?

Nope, I'm still using the name on my birth certificate the last I've checked.

ReanimatedSGB, may I please have the name of that book? Sounds bloody interesting!

[Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar]

So she’s not a friend at all, then. Blank her .
You refusing to rise to her nonsense won’t cause any drama; her acting the dick despite you ignoring her probably will.
But it’s for the rest of the group to put her in her place, not you to suck it up to avoid a scene.

[hipposarerad]

Tell her you think Soggy Nugget suits her better and that's how you'll refer to her from now on.

Or just blank her and when she asks why tell her she can either start showing you some basic courtesy or you'll be forced to go to HR about her bullying you. Because she is try g to bully you.

Or, depending on the culture where you work, just tell her to fuck off.

[LittleMissedTheSunshine]

I'd just say 'can I call you Cuntfeatures? suits you so much better!'

[hipposarerad]

Whoops I thought you worked together, sorry the HR comment is dumb!

She is a bully though - take the piss mercilessly and don't show her any mercy.

What a prick, I'm annoyed on your behalf.

[TheOrigFV45]

I have a double barrelled first name, but w/o a hyphen. PITA tbh, but it's my name - think Mary Lou

I've had people ask my name, I tell them Mary Lou and they ask if they can just call me Mary. Ermm, no. Mary is a lovely name, but it's not mine and if you can't be bothered to make the effort to call me by my name then I don't think we'd get on.

[thetemptationofchocolate]

Call her Rudy :)

[BarrackerBarmer]

I'm finding myself utterly distracted by the riddle of the portmanteau between a 'feminine' first and last name sounding like a first name on its own.

This is no help, I realise.

[Magicstar1]

I had this from a guy in college...so I just started calling him Fuckhead. He got soooo annoyed each time I did, but stopped changing my name.

[ExFury]

Too feminine sounds like a really cheeky insult to me. Like a backhanded compliment that’s not a compliment at all.

If the atmosphere in the group changes temporarily because you tell her more firmly to stop then that’s her doing not yours.

“Either use my name, or don’t refer to me at all.” would be my stance and I’d stop responding to her if she calls you anything other than your name.

[Tinty]

Start calling her Fatarse or scraggy neck or thicky and then say "trust me, this suits you better, you'll see".

[gamerchick]

Yeah you need to start calling her by another name telling her it suits her better. Please assert yourself.

[boterbier]

I'm finding myself utterly distracted by the riddle of the portmanteau between a 'feminine' first and last name sounding like a first name on its own.

Not the best example by a mile, but imagine something along the lines of someone named Caroline Barron, for instance, being addressed as Caron (Karen)!

[SuckOnTHATRyan]

She sounds dreadful! I would blank her tbh. Wouldn’t feel a shred of guilt either.

[allthgoodusernamesaretaken]

Does she by any chance also come out with phrases like "I tell it like it is, I'm a straight talker"

Or "I'm bit like Marmite, people love me or hate me" ?

[SuckOnTHATRyan]

Ha! Hate the “I tell it like it is people” - not the ones who are genuinely just quite direct, the ones who are actually really unkind but call it “telling it like it is”.

I had pictured the op’s “friend” more as one of those dickheads who thinks they’re HILARIOUS but are actually really irritating and egocentric.

[LeftRightCentre]

Oh, so she's not a colleague! In that case I'd tell her she seems to get off on bullying and then sneering to get away with it, but you're not up for it. You call me by name or I won't respond to you at all. Is there someone who leads the clubs? I'd let them know you find this bullying behaviour and shouldn't have to put with it. She's a complete and total bitch.

[Unobtainable]

When I was in my teens, a friend of a friend did this to me.

Say my name is Fran, she said she'd decided to call me Fanny because it suited me better and was funny.

It turned out that she was jealous of me joining the group because her best friend wanted to spend more time with me. She'd do anything and everything to undermine me. She just didn't like me.

It confused people who knew me and people I'd just met. I changed her name and told her from now on she'd be known as mildly offensive name which refers to an un-evolved human-type species. She wasn't happy as everyone else latched onto this and it became her name.

In short, she was jealous and threatened by me. Could that be what's happening here? Especially the insulting 'your name is too feminine for you' bollocks.