Secondary school uniform

[Bumbelinadance]

AIBU to say I just kind of feel the focus should be on educating children not their appearance . Ds just started secondary school Who decided a fully buttoned up to the top button shirt and tie was required
...? He hates how that feels all day. Restricting !
He is in a regular state school , yet his uniform was so expensive my parents Kindly stepped in

Surely it up up to the children to decide what path they go down as adults surely ?They can suit it and boot it if they choose to go into a profession where a certain dress code is required .
Comfortable trousers or joggers / skirts if preferred at a reasonable price and a school logo jumper might shift the focus from appearance to learning

I am all for a ban on designer logos and trainers to avoid a haves / have nots scenario
But I really dont get the English uniform obsession

Also I feel hugely amazed by our teachers and support them fully , feel the profession like most of our key workers ( ambulance drivers, nurses , police etc) is underpaid and under appreciated
But I don’t think their job should be to enforce a terribly old fashioned view that an 11 year old should wear a blazer. I also feel very strongly my child should be allowed to express himself as he wishes with his hairstyle and dress PROVIDED HE REMAINS POLITE AND RESPECTFUL TO HIS TEACHERS / ADULTS and meets the schools expectations with academic effort and behaviour
If he wants tramlines in his hair how does that affect whether he gets an a or a d grade ..?

They are there to learn
Achieve their potential
Be told they can be an astronaught if they work hard enough
Not told their appearance defines them

It isn’t really accepted in the workplace so why is it happening in our schools ...?

Myfrei Ds in the USA send their kids to school in clothes they are comfortable in ,so they can focus on learning

That you know of, but how would you know? It seems to me like some teachers may be so busy making a point about unimportant things, like loo breaks and top buttons being done up, that they may lose sight of the individual child’s needs and welfare. Understandable really, when educated, busy individuals like teachers are being asked to spend their valuable time enforcing (fucking silly imo) rules about uniforms.

Btw, beksyt, if you found out a parent was refusing to let their child use the bathroom when they needed to, what would you think of their parenting btw?

I am not sure you can compare me telling a child to hang on until after class with a parent stopping a child.
Have you never told your child to wait until they get home?

Not when there’s a loo right there, no and not if the journey was going to take 2 hours 5 minutes. I’d find them a loo before we set off, obviously. Like most normal people who don’t fancy letting children in their care piss in their pants to make a point.

So what if students are scruffy? What is wrong with them being comfortable? It is school not work.

The rest of Europe manages to go to school without benefit of black polyester blazers and still do well academically. IME once the novelty wears off students quickly settle for the standards of tee shirt & jeans.

Not having uniform makes it far easier to have sensible discussions about what is appropriate in different circumstances.

Art - you are going to get messy
Labs - safety so feet covered, hair tied back
Cooking - as above

It isnt rocket science but teaches students to think about what they are wearing.

Mindlessly enforcing a uniform teaches nothing about how to dress and probably explains why the English are some of the scruffiest adults around.

Year 6 are capable of holding it without pissing their pants.

Year 6 are capable of holding it without pissing their pants.
It's not just about wetting yourself. It is hard to concentrate when you need the toilet or a drink of water. Students should be able to go to the toilet or get a drink of water when they need to (with obvious exceptions if they are in the middle of a science experiment or similar).

Year 6 are capable of holding it without pissing their pants.

I know adults with no particular bladder problems who could not hold it for over two hours if they really needed to go, had just had lunch and a bottle of water etc.

The rest of Europe manages to go to school without benefit of black polyester blazers and still do well academically. IME once the novelty wears off students quickly settle for the standards of tee shirt & jeans

Exactly^^. All this talk of looking ‘smart’. It’s frequently synthetic tat. Expensive, synthetic tat at that. European pupils look at least as well presented in their own clothes as most British uniforms to me. It’s all rather subjective, which is why the blanket rules seem arbitrary.

And when they have the shits - you think they can hold that too?

Or at lease they could hold it in considerable discomfort and embarrassment at being made to. If a boss did this to an employee who was working in an office with Lois right there, I hope to god they’d be sued.

Who’s Lois? Loos!

Both my girls have reoccurring kidney infections caused by holding. So they had to give them toilet passes. Holding is not healthy for anyone. At work im allowed to.go when i need to, everyones body is different some have smaller bladders than others. It is a basic right to use a toilet.

@beksyt

The point is they don't have to, or they shouldn't anyway. What's your point?

Abolish school uniforms altogether. "Looking smart" is bullshit. They're kids. They'll have a lifetime of dressing up for jobs. And blazers+ties are just moronic.

@Eliza9917

Why don't you try climbing out your own arse. My children look smart in their polo shirts, trousers and school jumpers. Who do you think you are to judge others? Clearly am uppity snob who thinks they are better than others, news flash your not. Your children wearing whatever ridiculous uniform you make them wear everyday doesn't make you or them better than anyone else. Grow up!

YY to the UTI / kidney infections. My sister used to hold it all day at school as she was so anxious she wouldn’t ask to go - I always thought that was a bit silly of her as NO WAY would any teacher refuse to let a young girl have a pee. Shows what I knew. But anyway, she started getting on and off UTIs for years. Only stopping when she was in her late thirties. It’s not good to hold it.

My doctor friends and relatives tell me off as I do tend to hold it at work (as I’m frequently too busy to go; not that I’m not “allowed” to. Any job where I couldn’t use the loo would probably not be legal. Even in the worst working conditions I’ve ever experienced, with no breaks over an 8 hour shift etc, we’ve had free use of the loo. It’s pretty fucking basic).

We aren't in the UK. My kids don't wear uniforms to school. They can have pink shaved hair if they like. They can wear flip flops or shorts to class if they want. They can leave class to go to the toilet without even having to ask the teacher.

They do have to wear trainers to gym, and they have to wear closed toe shoes in the workshop. There's a good reason for it, so they do it.

The vast majority of kids are too busy to treat school like a fashion parade. They get up early, throw on shorts and a T-shirt and a hoody, pack their bags, eat breakfast, and get on the bus. In winter it's jeans and a T-shirt and a hoody.

Their schools do well both academically and in terms of raising human beings who go out and do well in the world. Over 95% of the kids go on to college. Many of them go into jobs that involve wearing smart clothes, or uniforms. Many join the military and obey rules. Many end up leading companies. Many go into academia and make important discoveries. Some go into politics and change the world.

They do all of this without having to wear a uniform at school, and despite having been allowed to use a toilet when they needed to.

Their teachers - instead of focusing on imposing arbitrary and petty uniform rules - get on with teaching and imposing discipline where needed.

The funny thing is that the school has a roaring trade in selling school sweatshirts, hats, T-shirts. Kids actually are proud of going there, and wear the stuff out of choice when they're not in school. They wear it to show where they're from. They buy school T-shirts to give to their cousins who live in the UK.

Can you imagine someone from a UK school buying a piece of their uniform to give to a cousin in the US because they're proud of it?

Late twenties sorry. She’s not even 35 yet - she wouldn’t thank me for that!

Can you imagine someone from a UK school buying a piece of their uniform to give to a cousin in the US because they're proud of it?
Maybe only if the go to Hogwarts

Incidentally one teacher did stop my daughter going to the toilet and she ended up with a kidney infection that night and had to have another day off school. Yes i went mental at the school and the teacher.

YANBU OP. DS's uniform is hideously expensive to say that it's made of polyester. As well as a blazer they have to wear a polyester "slipover" (tank top). You can imagine what a teenage boy smells like at the end of a hot day.

DS has a diagnosis of Asperger's. His sensory issues means that he struggles with tight clothing, labels etc. When we looked at secondary schools we opted for the one where the uniform was polo shirts / sweatshirts. Imagine his dismay when just before he started they became an academy and changed the uniform.

I don't agree that uniforms prevent bullying. He's going to get bullied whatever he wears because some of his behaviour marks him out as different. In fairness to the school they're working hard to stop this. What they don't accept is that they could make his life (and the lives of other children with sensory issues) a little happier if they didn't have such restrictive uniform policies.

Maybe only if the go to Hogwarts

Good point - DS does have a Hogwarts T-shirt

@timeisslippingaway Delude yourself all you like, polo shirts are not smart. Nothing can change that fact.

@BITCAT

If the teacher was aware of her medical problems that is disgusting

We had 2 induction days for our new year 7. One in July when they came in their own clothes. One in September on their first day.
They were in a totally different “mode” in their uniform - calm, focussed, on the ball.

My sister’s year 6 teacher did not allow her to go to the loo - she had a kidney infection, hadn’t told anyone - she was too embarrassed to say. Anyway she wet herself and unusually my Dad was in when she walked through the door in floods of tears ..... I think that teacher may have got quite a blasting from my father as she never ever refused another child’s a loo request - well at least not in the years my other 4 siblings attended.