AIBU - free school meals application against my wishes.

[GlitterSand]

Two years ago I became eligible to claim free school meals,
I do not need the assistance so declined the offer.
The local council sent me a silly amount of letters about being entitled to claim, I phoned them and asked them to stop, explained that I didn't need to claim and asked them to make a note on my 'file' not to contact me again.
However, within a few months it started again I ignored them until I received a letter that basically said 'you are entitled to claim this so we are going to put in a claim on your behalf'
This annoyed me and I sent them a letter telling them that I do not give them permission to ever make a claim for FSMs on my behalf, that I wanted it marked on my file that I never want a claim for FSMs to be made in my name.
Someone from the council called me and apologised he said he made a note on my file and I would not be contacted again.

My DC has just started secondary school and for the second day in a row, his student account was not charged for the meal he had.
I just called the school and they have told me that his account has not been charged because he is in receipt of FSM, I told her this is a mistake and she is going to look into it and call me back.

I'm currently on hold to the council.

I'm so angry, how dare they put in a claim without my knowledge or permission and against my explicit request not to.
AIBU to be so annoyed?

I'm just posting to vent really, to try to calm down before I speak to anyone, but I'm just so angry that they can go against my wishes and put in a claim for a benefit that I do not want.

No dont get me wrong i understand what you're saying but the OP is already in receipt of benefits. She must be to qualify for FSMs. If her child gets the free meals then not only does he benefit by the pupil premium helping his school but she has the opportunity (if she really does feel she didnt need to help) to put something extra aside for him

I am with the OP. She doesn’t want FSM for her dc and that should be the end of it.
I think trying to guilt trip her into accepting FSM is wrong.

Elementtree
She might have 300k in the bank and a mortgage free million pound home. She may get be happy to live on the interest, maintenance and spend some capital each year.

What is it to you?

How does this have any bearing on whether it is ok for someone else to claim a benefit in your child's name without your permission?

Thank you Elementtree.

But to be eligible to claim fsm you must be claiming other benefits. Income support. Income related jsa and esa.child tax credit. Working Tax credit. Some immigration support. Universal credit.

If your happy to claim at least one of them that benefits you. Why won’t you allow your child to claim a benefit that benefits him. In more ways that one.

Basically, OP is very wealthy and would like us all to know, and is desperate to not be seen as otherwise to the school mums

However if you're entitled to FSM, you can't be as loaded as you make out, so I'm guessing either delusions of grandeur or a non-declaration of income /maintenance

Tinywhale
I would feel exactly the same as you do OP.

It is ridiculous to call the OP selfish. The pupil premium is to pay for additional support for disadvantaged children. The OP’s DS is not disadvantaged. The school are being selfish by trying to claim it for a child that is not disadvantaged

This is exactly my point, my DC is not in any way disadvantaged, which is the whole point of the pupil premium, the fact that also benefits the school is a happy coincidence, its main and original purpose was to give an advantage to disadvantaged children.

Why should I allow a benefit to be fraudulently claimed in my name just to benefit others?

How about explaining why you think its fraud?

What a heap of bollocks.

If this was true, YANBU to be pissed off that the school claimed in your name, without your permission.

But it is, as I said, bollocks.

HTH.

Why is it fraud OP? You're entitled to because youre already claiming benefits

The OP’s DS is not disadvantaged

If the OP lives separately to her son’s father then, whether she likes it or not, there is much credible evidence out there which suggests he will experience some level of educational disadvantage.

Of course, there are reasons why this may not actually be the case but why would you deny your child the opportunity that being PP affords him? At the very least, his progress will be closely monitored - far better than falling down the cracks (as so many do).

If op was very wealthy the council would not inform her that she’s entitled to free school dinners, a fact that they could only be aware of because she’s claiming benefits already.
But apparently there’s a hierarchy of benefits, some being too shameful to claim, whilst others are grabbed with both hands.
What a load of old nonsense, op.
You sound quite half witted.

Maintenance does not count as income so even if you are a former WAG on maintenance then you can claim benefits.

That's as maybe, but common sense would mean that most ex-partners wouldn't be as grabby as to claim when they're so well-off. And if it's really the case that someone can be getting £5k or whatever a month from an ex-spouse, tax free and still be eligible for benefits then the system STINKS.

I think your point is brilliant, more people should see it like you do.

I agree with PolkerrisBeach. The OP has enough maintenance that she feels she doesnt need the FSMs as she feels it would be fraudulent and taking money out of the system but doesnt feel the same way about the other benefit shes receiving. Just because maintenance doesnt count for benefit eligibility doesnt mean everyone with high levels of maintenance would still claim benefits. Does it?

OP would not be entitled to school meals if she was ‘very wealthy’ because she wouldn’t be claiming the benefits which make her entitled to school meals.

This is crazy. I feel sorry for the parents on low incomes who are struggling to manage but aren't eligible.

Weird thread op. I'm sure if you started one saying "would I be unreasonable to claim FSM even though I get shit tons from EX and I don't actually need it" you would be ripped to shreds.

And no, yanbu to be annoyed that this was done against your will, pupil premium aside (which yes, we all know is good) it's ridiculous to say you have to do this if you don't want it.

How about explaining why you think its fraud?

because someone filled out paperwork on her behalf?

If the OP lives separately to her son’s father then, whether she likes it or not, there is much credible evidence out there which suggests he will experience some level of educational disadvantage.

But pupil premium is not paid for every child that lives separately from one of their parents, is it?

One point to consider is that if your child attends a state school and is in receipt of FSM there could be other future benefits depending on what profession they wish to pursue.

For example in the legal sector there is currently a fantastic social mobility scheme that my DD gained access to because she is a first generation university student but other eligibility criteria also included being in receipt of FSM when at school. We are not deprived but we certainly are not wealthy and the access to work placements, workshops and one on one mentoring in the city was instrumental in helping her gain a training contract.

The Sutton Trust also offer fantastic opportunities to students and on some courses FSM is part of the eligibility criteria.

Villiers Park offer the same and if you are in receipt of FSM there are bursaries in place to cover the entire cost of their courses.

When my DC goes on a school trip I always pay significantly more than the cost of the trip as I know the school relies on extra help to subsidise the cost for the children whose parents can't afford to pay and I don't think anyone should have to miss out on educational school trips.

Bollocks!

This thread is getting funnier by the minute and I'm only 3/4 of the way through.

Can you do me a favour OP, look at your school's budget for the coming year. Last term I signed off on one of the most excruciating budgets I've seen in the 6 years I've been a governor. We've had to lay off TAs because there is simply no money. The £900 pupil premium the school would get for your child (which doesn't get spent on an individual child but mostly on whole school interventions) would make an enormous difference.
I'm sorry but I'm quite angry at the harm your pride is causing to the entire school community.
Seriously, every pound counts, the education system in this country has been fucked over. But hey, you'd rather that money goes on a Tory MP's expenses for a posh hotel.

tinywhale Can you imagine?! I think the UK might crash and burn if that were the case

OP I can't understand why people are giving you such a hard time, it seems ridiculous to me that the claim has been made without your authority

Schools encourage parents to claim as it counts towards their figures when analysing results.

That's not why, schools have to meet targets about FSM pupils achieving as highly as non-FSM pupils so it's not good for a school to have more FSM pupils from that point of view. Where it is good is the extra approx £950 per pupil that the school gets.

My financial situation is not the point of this thread.
I don't see why I should have to explain or defend my situation but fine.

When my ex-husband and I separated I was 'let go' from my job (working for one of his companies) I decided to go freelance and am now self-employed.
I file tax returns every year and pay a large amount of tax. for the last two years I have been entitled to a small amount of Child tax credits, its less than £20 a month but I feel that given the amount of tax I pay every year I am justified in claiming back what I am entitled to in child tax credits.
I declare my maintenance on my tax return every year as an additional declaration because I want to make sure I'm being crystal clear with HMRC, although I have been told multiple times that it is not counted as 'income' I still choose to add it because I don't want to risk it being overlooked.

I started this thread because I was very annoyed that the council had gone against my wishes and put in a claim against my name without my knowledge or consent. when I had specifically told them several times that I did not want to claim.

I understand that you all thing I'm being very unreasonable not to claim when it will benefit the school, I have tried to explain how I feel as though in my case it won't benefit the school as much, that I don't feel it is necessary, that my DC is not disadvantaged and doesn't require the extra support that PP is designed to pay for.

I never meant my explanations to be interpreted as bragging, I don't see myself as being anything special at all.
My DC goes to an excellent school in a very nice area.
When we looked at schools we considered private but since the state schools here are fantastic we decided to use the money we would have spent on private fees to benefit the state school instead and that is what we did all throughout primary school and will continue to do through secondary.

I'm not trying to be snobby, brag or be selfish at all, I'm simply trying to explain myself better.

I believe that child maintenance is not included in income when calculating benefits which is why the OP has a generous income from her ex husband whilst being eligible for free school meals. (I know it sounds bonkers but this is how it needs to be to protect the children with feckless non-resident parents who don't pay their kids a penny)

I am confused about why you are happy to claim income support benefits etc you don't need with your generous allowance but not the free school meals and pupil premium that would help your child's school.

You are right to question why they've filled the form out for you though.