AIBU to get irritated by people trying to derail lighthearted threads

[MVLipwig]

It just seems unnecessary when they are just upsetting theirselves and spoiling it for other people.
I’m talking
“What’s your favourite treat food from the shops”
“Nothing. I live in a wooden crab infested shack and only eat mouldy dog food and sprouts”
Or
“What funny/silly nonsense did your family do with you as a child”
“Well they string me up and beat me with birches, I don’t know if that counts”
I understand hard lives, and it’s not been a picnic personally but I (and I assume others) read cheerful threads as nice escapism and happy memories and these posters are upsetting their selves and others

What are stars?

What’s a coal bunker?

It's the Same as a nuclear bunker but not underground

I'm taking it you have nuclear bunker

There was an actual thread a few weeks back asking people who own cars how they sleep at night knowing the damage we are doing to the planet.

I was at a budget retreat centre over the weekend where one (only the one out of the many there, mind) light switch was labelled "Switch off this light and save the planet."

Well, I am so thrilled to be able to announce to you good people that I put my own selfish desires aside, thought sacrificially of humanity and performed that great deed, so we're all safe now. Everybody as you were and feel free to fire up the Range Rover to pop to the local corner shop for a pint of milk. Please don't embarrass me by trying to thank me for my undoubtedly amazing magnanimity - I'm sure any other great philanthropist would have done exactly the same in my position. I may have turned it back on later when it started to get a bit dark

OP you are obviously a narcissist. Have you considered going NC with yourself?

Right, off I pop to undermine the NHS and promote obesity by having a bourbon with this cup of tea.

I'm taking it you have a nuclear bunker

Is that the same as a zombie proof apocolyptic underground bunker with infinite supplies including gas & electric??

If so...no, i don't have one. I have a shed, does that count?

Oh goodness me they don't actually get real stars they simply are allowed to imagine them ...briefly

Clearly because if I allowed them to look at real stars they would be appropriating them from all the other cultures that have laid claim to them and then I'd have to tell them to check their privilege

I do like this thread I thought of it when I was buying ds1 his last minute school stuff and I heard a loud woman announcing how relieved she was she had bought all the school kit weeks ago and so didn't have to deal with all this last minute nonsense

I resisted tripping her as she walked past....just

Webuiltthisbuffet

Terribly handy when saving the world comes with instructional notices....thats very useful

A coal bunker us what the neighbours kept thier coal in. They rented it out to us at 1 kidney a month and for cleaning thier house every day with out bare hands.
They apparently used the coal to heat thier house! Imagine!

We had to remember to be out on delivery day. Grandad forgot and we never saw him for a week could just hear the moans!

I should have started a heating thread a couple of weeks ago in the middle of August when it got so cold in my house I put my heating on two nights running.

Here in Siberia, where we live, we decided last winter to have our boiler decommissioned, taken out and thrown in the community metal recycling facility after we saw a penguin shivering a bit once and it brought home to us just how disgusting every single one of us is as a species (well, obviously, not us any more). If it gets a bit nippy, no drama: we just put on an extra twenty of thirty duffel coats. If anything, showing our compassion for the planet has actually enriched our lives in many ways. Gone are the days when we had to regularly use toxic detergent to launder our DC's bedsheets every day when they had liquid-wet the bed; now it takes us a matter of seconds to scoop up the ice cubes as soon as they get up. We then store them until the summer, when we leave them to naturally defrost and use them when making nutritious organic lemon smoothies, which have benefited our family health no end. Don't let us dictate to YOUR family, though - it's up to everybody individually to decide without any pressure or guilt whether they want to protect this beautiful world or to actively and wilfully cause it to burn up and wipe out all life forms forever in a catastrophic nuclear fireball.

You drink piss

You sound very entitled OP.

I find the mention of crabs very triggering, as when I was a child I was eaten by a crab, and then was forced to live on my own regurgitated remains.

You drink piss

Don't be so vulgar - we consider it Nature's Liquid Bounty and we weep actual tears when we think of the vast majority of humanity just flushing all of that organic goodness away as if it were some kind of unpleasant waste product. It's harmless, sterile and nutritious - you even find that you get used to the admittedly slightly strong smell after a few months. If you're ever passing my way, I'd love it if we could meet so that I can educate you. You'd be very welcome to drop by for a smoothie and some delicious home-made cruelty-free warm chocolate pudding....

Willow😀

Deal.

I'll bring the bloody Mary's.

@Gettingbackonmyfeet

Well while I do think you're spoiling them a bit by letting them even briefly imagine stars and making a rod for your own back in the pricess...not my monkeys, not my circus.

@Pissedoffdotcom

"If so...no, i don't have one. I have a shed, does that count?"

I'm saving all my shillings to buy my very own shed, I should have enough saved up by 2218.

@Baumederose

"You drink piss"

Don't be classist, that's all some folks can afford.

*process

Yes the showering one perplexes me too. Perhaps these judgemental Mumsnet refs who need to shower 3 times a day have a body odour problem? I darent comment to say I shower once per day or - shock horror - sometime every other day!!!!!!

DUN DUN DUHUUHUN!!!

If I were excersising every day it would be different. But I’m not. Nor am I tramping through mud all day everyday.

And I’m on a water meter.

So there.

Hmph.

Sorry, did I make a lighthearted thread miserable?

Tinkerbell

I'll bring the bloody Mary's

😂😂😂

Gettingbetter I can oneup that: I bought all my DC's school stuff online the day they broke up. But only because I wasn't prepared to wait for Sainsbury's to get uniform in in dribs and drabs.

I was cooking earlier and thought about recipe threads. They are usually brilliant for one upmanship and strops.

Someone asks for a 'nice' recipe for whatever, and the posters fall over themselves to provide their delicious (possibly yummy) version. It can get quite heated as it emerges that people make things differently. Others not marvelling in wonder at their wisdom (or Granny Minnie's ) at how they make it can get quite stressful for some.

Ragu and Bolognese ones are particularly interesting.

The odd time you'll get people gushing over one particular recipe. (Which at times is confusing as they sound quite disgusting.)

Zoflora is the goddess of cleaning. If you do not use it are you a heathen?? How do you get everything clean?!
I don't.
Obviously I have a cleaner and spend a reasomable proportion of time wondering if they've cleaned by house properly and whether I should sack them. Having a cleaner is so stressful that I might have to book myself a spa day to recover.

(And no I don't actually have a cleaner.)

There will soon be Halloween threads, and with every one will come outraged people declaring that Halloween is American. It's not, they imported it from Celtic traditions in Scotland and Ireland.