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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

What is the worse First date you have ever been on?

126 replies

Lorddenning1 · 30/08/2018 13:47

I am newly single and in the future I will want to date again, but I feel like I am out of touch with the whole dating scene. There are several unspoken rules that you try to follow when it comes to a first date - not eating garlic and who pays for the food etc

But does anyone have any stories of the worse first date they have ever been on?

OP posts:

NumanoidNancy · 31/08/2018 16:24

Its depressing about the height age thing happening so often on OLD, though I guess lots of women must do it in various ways too. My most gutting OLD date was with a bloke who was in a really impressive unusual job (to me) and who wrote me fantastic imaginative emails that were quite something. When we finally met at his place of work, he had offered to show me around as I was such a fangirl. It was a real shock when he first showed up, he was really very short, as in a good foot shorter than he had stated on his profile, he looked like a little hobbit dressed in a tweed suit and everything. Ive dated short guys before so after I had got over being a bit cross at the stupid lie we went ahead with the date (the showing me round bit was cool at least) but he had the most droning monotone voice you ever heard and I just couldn't marry the 'him' I got from his emails to the 'him' in person. It was so disappointing.

NameChangingParanoid · 31/08/2018 17:18

One & only OLD experience about 8 years ago.

Got to the pub & ordered a drink, text him to ask where he was & he was sitting in his car waiting for me to get there as he didn’t want to stand at the bar on his own. I’m quite confident & really like confident guys so this put me off for starters.

Had a meh date, couple of drinks out of politeness, then he mentioned that he’d been off sick from work for a while with depression. I had suffered from depression too & was impressed about how brave / honest he was about it.

He told me that he got depressed after his best friend had died of a certain condition- turns out that’s the condition my son has!

Drank up & ordered a taxi - no coming back from that one!

RibenaMonsoon · 31/08/2018 20:57

I have one similar to Fairylea

On a blind date. We met in a pub. I didn't know much about the guy, only that he was in the army.

Got to the pub and he was already sat down with a drink, so I said my hello and went and got a drink myself.

Had a lovely chat, we didn't really click massively and didn't have a lot in common but he was a lovely guy and the conversation was flowing enough for it not to be awkward.

We agree to go to another place to play pool. We both stood up. He was just over 5ft5. I'm 5ft10 and was in 4 inch heels.
It was soooo awkward!

We went and played pool, chatted some more. I'm trying to perch on windowsill and sit down as much as I can so as not to intimidate the poor guy. But we both agreed at the end of the date not to have another one. The height difference was a deal breaker for both of us.

Shame, he was a nice guy. I hope he's happily settled down with the short girl of his dreams.

Original poster

Lorddenning1 · 31/08/2018 21:37

I think I might just stay single

OP posts:

Motherhood101Fail · 31/08/2018 21:56

This reply has been withdrawn

Message from MNHQ: This post has been withdrawn

Lulusmother · 31/08/2018 23:08

Many years ago, started talking to a man in OLD. Anyhow arranged to meet up at a pub. He described that he'd be wearing a t shirt and "slacks" which made me a bit 🤔
Anyhow I saw him in the car park going to the pub, and knew instantly he was definitely not going to be the one for me, however thought it would be rude to stand him up, so I went in.
He proceeded to tell me to get my own drink, told me that I had big feet and then told me how he had a flat at the end of his ex's garden, and that he'd once tried to run her over.
There was no second date.

HollowTalk · 31/08/2018 23:29

He proceeded to tell me to get my own drink, told me that I had big feet and then told me how he had a flat at the end of his ex's garden, and that he'd once tried to run her over.

I'm laughing so much at this.

Which bit did he think would make you attracted to him?

Catspyjamazzzz · 31/08/2018 23:33

motherhood101 we called that special ‘cocktail’ a Blastaway....lost many a night on that one.

ginandnappies · 31/08/2018 23:36

I got taken to a Tesco on the other side of town. He didn't even buy me anything!

YouTheCat · 31/08/2018 23:52

Blastaway was a Castaway and a Diamond White together. Lethal.

Raffles1981 · 01/09/2018 07:50

Lorddenning1, despite our horror stories, don't be disheartened. My friend had some horrific OLD experiences and some funny ones. But she did find her prince charming and they have been together for over a decade. It's possible to find a diamond in the rough xx

bridgetreilly · 01/09/2018 08:30

WORST

Not worse. That is all, thank you

AhHaaa · 01/09/2018 08:49

Two stick out. Both were casual pub dates before a 'proper' date (met on an online dating site many yrs ago)

One was so aggressive about how women had been awful to him. Not just girlfriends... his mum, his sis, his cousin, colleagues, random women he didn't even know (apparently!)... They'd all wronged him in one way or another. So angry I could see the fire in his eyes. Didn't ask a thing about me, just sat there ranting about what bitches women were.

The next was a guy who claimed to have a very successful career, hundreds of clients, well respected in the community, huge posh business premises. The pub we were meeting at was within close walking distance to his biz premises, so agreed to meet there so he could show off The biz premises were a huuuge lie. It was a pokey dilapidated office that had never seen a duster or a hoover in its life. And it turned out he lived there, in a flat that was built of the premises which looked no better. But, the worst bit was how he looked. He'd literally just crawled out of bed (late afternoon!) and just threw on some dirty creased clothes he'd clearly just scraped up off the floor, hair all over the place and in some stinky old slippers with the backs trodden down.... and accompanied me to the pub like that!

I politely tried to say "it's alright, I'm happy to wait while you get ready" but he just said "it's alright, I'm ready

Both dates were cut short and there were no 2nd proper dates!

viques · 01/09/2018 08:53

We got chatting as you do, and it dawned on me that he was my DD's RE teacher............ Hey ho.

BillywilliamV · 01/09/2018 08:57

Took me to pizza hut and paid with vouchers. Spent the evening telling me I should dress more feminine. Said he'd fantasised about me in stockings and suspenders. This was a guy Id met at the gym. He drove me home and I was so pressed up against the passenger door, trying to sit as far away from him as possible that I had a handle impression in the skin of my side when I got home. Deeply creepy!

DrDiva · 01/09/2018 09:32

We met at the station. Walk to the restaurant was a little quiet and awkward. Sat down at the table, ordered, then I said, “so what is it you do, exactly?” (You can see how natural the convo was!!)
He leant back in his chair, crossed his legs, and said, “well, it all began in 1984 when...” I then got a blow by blow account of his work history to date. And this was early 2000s, so many years to cover.

Or the one that was far older than his online photo. I texted a friend to say “oh my god, I’m on a date with Prince Philip!”

AhHaaa · 01/09/2018 10:18

Oh, also my DSIS and her DP set me up on a blind double-date on Valentine's Day with them and one of her DPs mates from work. I wasn't overly attracted to him when I first saw him, but decided to get to know him better. It would be rude just to walk out.

At the very first drink my DSIS immediately started with "Ah don't they look cute together!" and she proceeded with comments of the same nature for the next couple of hours, embarrassing both me and this guy.

But then later, in another bar, showing signs of being very drunk, he started telling me he really liked me and then just lunged in for a full on sloppy aggressive snog, grabbing ny face and actually hurting me.

After he let go I said to DSIS "toilets, now!" where I proceeded to tell her I was now feeling uncomfortable and I was considering going home. She begged me not to, explained he was just really nervous and liked me a lot. He's actually a really nice guy, just thinks I'm out of his league and to give him a chance. Blah blah blah.

Guilt-tripped by DSIS I agreed to stay, but on returning from the loo's my blind date had disappeared. DSISs DP says "oh he gets like this when he's too drunk, wanders off not knowing where he is or what day of the week it is"

Ffs!

So we go on the hunt to look for him to make sure he's safe. DSIS and her DP are frantically ringing him. In the end I get fed up and went home. I wasn't interested and just wanted my bed.

I wake up to a text. DSIS has given him my bloody number now! It's him apologising for his behaviour. Said he got way too drunk to deal with his nerves and didnt want to embarrass hinself any more so chose to just leave, but ended up getting lost and slept in a car on a car showrooms forecourt! Said he was sorry, that he'd really like to go on another date just the two of us. But then followed up with another text immediately after saying "...but not any time soon"

That's fine mate, you won't be getting another date any time soon anyway!

Iwasjustabouttosaythat · 01/09/2018 12:54

"boy who decided his soup was too hot at the restaurant so cooled it down with ice cubes from his drink." I'd happily date this guy! Practical, problem solver and self confident.

I was thinking the same thing. 😂 Unless he plopped the ice cubes in in such a way it splashed the soup all over your white shirt or scarred you horribly.

ArsenicNLace · 01/09/2018 13:54

@ HurricainBiancaDelRio

Are you the one whose date carried out an armed robbery and set you up as the getaway driver???

fattyboomboomboom · 01/09/2018 17:19

On an OLD date I was someone's worst ever.

He had told me proudly on the phone that his ears were pointed like Dr Spock and he could wiggle them. I laughed at his little joke, it wasn't a joke. He turned up in a badly creased yellow Pringle jumper and waggled his ears at my quite a lot. I started crying and couldn't stop. He was a nice man and tried to comfort me, but this involved the ears getting closer and made me cry harder. So we cut the date short, and I crashed my car into his on the way out of the car park.

HollowTalk · 01/09/2018 18:56

PhaedrasChocolate · 02/09/2018 07:12

Oh holy Jesus fatty

Sorry, I don't like calling you that!

Fleetwoodmac2 · 02/09/2018 08:45

@hurricanebiancadelrio

Bet you're the woman that got duped in to thinking she was on a first date but actually ended up being arrested for being a getaway driver for an armed robbery

fattyboomboomboom · 02/09/2018 10:12

Phaedras - you can call me boom boom

Daffodildainty · 02/09/2018 10:37

In the 80s I was a teenager, didn’t fancy him but he offered to drive me to an amazing club 30 miles from home. He turned up in a white shirt and black shirt with black Cuban heeled boots. Fairly awful evening. In the way home he drove up a lane and stopped in a deserted car park where he took off his jacket and started unbuttoning his shirt. I asked what the hell he was doing and he said ‘ my mammy washed my vest in a new detergent and it’s itchy’. He removed his red nylon vest (with white piping) put on his shirt and jacket and drove me home. No second date.

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