Was I rude or the Morrison's delivery driver?

[Pyongyang]

I know this is really small, and I’m happy to be told IABU but just genuinely wondering if I could have handled it different. So would really appreciate your opinions on this.

today I had my shopping delivered, I live on the first floor. She came up with the bags and I directed her to my kitchen, my kitchen is literally next to the front door, only a few steps away. As she walked towards my kitchen she huffed, rolled her eyes and said “alright” I thought maybe she was stressed or tired, so I offered to go down and help her with the bags, she refused. She came up a few times and didn’t speak to me and avoided eye contact.

When she came up the second or third time, I asked her if that was it and she said “yeah” on her way out. Didn’t even hand me the receipt or couldn’t be bothered to let me know they’re weren’t any more bags.

Just to correct, when delivery drivers come up with the trays I just take the bags myself while they go get the rest. When they just come up with the bags I just tell them to put them in the kitchen since it’s so close to the front door, or sometimes they will ask me where I want them.

So was I rude for directing her to the kitchen or was she just plain rude?

She was so quick to leave
Gee, anyone would think she had other deliveries to do within a given timeslot or something....

Op, of course you could have spoken to her. It's always possible to make small talk 'have you got many more deliveries to do today?' 'Sorry about the stairs, I realise they make it hard work' etc etc.

Perhaps she was rather silent because you seemed silent. Perhaps she's writing a thread now about sullen customers. The thing is, a bit of friendliness is required from both sides, not just throw being paid.....and you can only be responsible for your own behaviour...it's your choice whether to interact or be silent. Yes, I grant you that a grumpy delivery driver might reduce your own chat, but I still think that in those few minutes of interaction the customer should say a few words to show recognition of that persons humanity. Perhaps she went away feeling a bit cross because not only did you have lots of stairs and want your stuff in the kitchen, but you also seemed rude??

Of course she was rude. If she worked in a shop and a customer asked her a question or to get an item from out the back or whatever, if she huffed and puffed and rolled her eyes, she'd be in bother.

The OP is a customer and a smile and a few words cost nothing.

www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/jan/31/what-really-thinking-supermarket-delivery-driver

I always take my delivery at the door because I don’t want the cats to get out but, after reading this, I always explain that to the driver so they won’t think that I just think I’m being precious about dirty feet or something similar.

From the Tesco website:

Not really relevant given the delivery was from Morrison’s.

@Nikephorus
Exactly, the OP got the receipt

@OP if your kitchen is soooo close to your front door, was it really such a hardship to take the bags off of her and put them in the kitchen yourself??

Or did you just lean against the worktop in silence while she trudged up and down your stairs carrying all the bags?

Haven't we all faced the slightly sullen check out operator in all kinds of shops? Don't we just get on with our day,nhaving forgotton it within about 30 seconds? Yes, customer facing staff should be pleasant and polite, but sometimes after a long day, especially it isn't easy to be gregarious and cheerful - I'd think we could just accept that as a fact of life. The demands on these staff seem to be very high - not only do they have to meet a punishing schedule of deliveries, do heavy manual work including lots of stairs, deal with traffic,neeather and access issues, her paid very little, face customers who are sullen or rude themselves, but still remain constantly cheerful and positive. If I had the odd sullen one, I wouldn't be surprised nor too worried about it.

Every few months or so I get a huge delivery of incontinence products for my 13yr old DS. They are massive boxes and I am 5 foot nowt. 9 times out of 10 the guys (it is always men) offer to bring them in the hall for me but on the odd occasion they just leave them on on the step and then proceed to watch me struggle. Have I ever complained? No, it's a crappy job and I think cutting someone a bit of slack is a nice thing to do.

I think you were demanding more than was reasonable. You say she had to make several trips up and down stairs to bring them to you anyway............and you then say that your kitchen " is just a few steps in the front door " so you were treating her like your slave frankly.

Did you tip her for this extra service ? Shopping gets brought to your door. Unless you were disabled or sat there with a cast on yer arm its a bit much to expect someone who is doing timed deliveries to waste her time cos you can't be bothered to move your own shopping from your door to the kitchen.

YBVU and rude, and to even contemplate complaining cos she wasn't chatty ????? Get a life.

I think you were rude. Your kitchen is a couple of steps from your door so carry your own bags through then. She could have been half way down to get the next lot of bags in the time in took to take the bags through then come back out.

I have my shopping delivered by Tesco to the kitchen because it’s straight off the backdoor. I’m disabled but don’t just stand and watch I do the light things, DH or the driver does the rest.

Again, there are people on this thread who would have complained, I am NOT one of them.

Did you tip her for this extra service ?

Why would I do that when I've already paid £4 charge for delivery?

Ovaltine1

She did what was expected of her, maybe not cheerfuly. It is a long, tough, thankless job. Just give her a break!

""I don't want to get her in to trouble and I certainly don't want her to lose her job, but..." Bollocks. If you don't want her in trouble, just don't complain.

That attitude absolutely stinks. No one has the right to huff and puff, to be openly ignorant and make someone feel uncomfortable in their own home. If someone is openly rude then OF COURSE you should complain about them, otherwise delivery drivers would just chuck your shopping at you if there was no need for some level of customer service. It doesn't require much to be polite, you don't have to grin like a lunatic all the time, just be civil to your fellow human beings.

........and you then say that your kitchen " is just a few steps in the front door " so you were treating her like your slave frankly.

Don't be so ridiculous.

@Roussette
Yes to basic kindnesses generally where possible, like an offer of a cuppa or glass of water to whoever is calling at the house. (Thread is about more than that I know and I’m not having a dig at anyone.)

'If someone is openly rude of course you should complain...'

Seems people have different ideas of what rudeness is and what warrants a complaint. I'm not sure I would say that clearly not enjoying your job is openly rude and warrants a complaint.

My mantra is, only complain when there really is a proper issue that really needs addressing. Complaining DOES set in motion a chain of events - monitoring, possible disciplinary action etc etc. Sometimes of course this is warranted and needed, but often it isn't.

I think we should both expect to receive good customer service, but also to be realistic about our expectations and not be too quick to condemn and decide to complain. And I wonder if those who are quick to shout 'outrageous rudeness - must complain' are those who are struggling in life themselves and get some kind of kick and boost and sense of importance by over-emphasising these kind of things and feeling outraged about their 'rights' and what they have paid for being infringed. Just wondering about that. Is it a product of having not a lot else to worry about, that leads to people over-analysing every human interaction and looking to take offence very easily, and to feel a sense of power by complaining.

And I note that Op isn't interested in complaining. Well good. Perhaps the service she received wasn't the best, but hey ho, life moves on just fine. Let's hope that delivery driver is sitting down having a cup of tea now and feeling a bit more cheerful.

@ChocolateWombat, if it were me in this situation, I probably would not complain either, but I reject the notion that you should not complain about something just because the person might get in trouble. If something is wrong it should be addressed.

I grew up in another country and was surprised when I moved to the UK to see a much different customer service standard than I am used to.

I said perhaps say something in have your say because I work in a similar role and would not expect to give this sort of service to what I perceive to be a fairly innocuous request 'oh, would you mind just placing the shopping over there, thanks.'

On tills, I get people asking to scan stuff in a certain order, have their change in a certain way or help pack. I certainly wouldn't eye roll and I wouldn't do the equivalent of what the driver did and not speak, just hold my hamd out for the money and throw their change at me with no please, thank you, eye contact or smile

But I said there are clearly times when complaining is right...and there are times when someone needs to be in trouble. What I did say is that I think we should think carefully about when it's right to complain....it's very easy to have a knee jerk reaction and complain over a very small thing...and when this happens people can be in trouble when really they shouldn't be or don't need to be. It's about making that judgement. Some people are very quick to want to complain about all kinds of things - sometimes it is warranted and sometimes it isn't.

Have your say is not really that. It's more about feedback on what customers think of our service rather than a formal complaint.

I know what customers can be like but op doesn't sound lime one of them. I also work with some people who really should give up a customer facing role.

If one of our customers were to make the op feel like that, I know the managers would be on to it. I do think in our culture that if someone is rude to us, we somehow deserve it, which isn't always the case

Staff, I mean

And I agree again that the service the Op received wasn't the best nor what the supermarket would wish their customer to receive. There are surely degrees of less than perfect customer service though aren't there. There would be being downright and openly rude to a customer, refusing to help them or damaging their shopping, plus parking I considerately and being rude to neighbours too. Then there's looking a bit miserable after climbing 2 flights of stairs 4 times and not chatting and hurrying away, perhaps displaying in your face that you're not thrilled to be asked to take the shopping into the kitchen, but doing it anyway, if a little grudgingly. There are degrees of good customer service also also of less satisfactory - and customers have to expect that and to be honest, if they want to complain about everything which is less than perfect, they are going to be phoning or emailing an awful lot....and why bother, and why be bothered by minor little things like this? They might not be perfect, but isn't that what life is like and isn't being a mature adult partly about acknowledging that - not accepting crap and terrible service silently, but knowing when something is crap and terrible and needs commenting on, and when it's just.....a little disappointing, so letting it go and moving on,rather for than dwelling on it.

I just think that there are too many bigger more important things in life to give one's attention to, than the fact a delivery driver was rather surly.

Being a bit quiet, ok, but eye rolling is awful, though

Being a bit quiet, ok, but eye rolling is awful, though

Really? IMO telling customer to fuck off would be awful, but moving eyeballs about not so much.
I've never noticed anyone eye roll in real life (as opposed to on TV) perhaps I'm not watching faces closely enough.