To ask for your breastfeeding in public experiences?

[AlwaysFuckingTired]

Currently BF 3 week old DD2. I avoided BF in public with DD1 as much as possible due to anxiety about how people would react, but this led to me doing ridiculous things like feeding her in a toilet so I've decided I'm going to be braver this time.

How did you find BF in public? Did you get any unkind looks or comments? Did you use a cover or not?

Did once have a waitress shout very loudly across a cafe to the kitchen 'CAN YOU KEEP THIS LADY'S FOOD WARM PLEASE SHE'S BREASTFEEDING' which was a bit weird but I think she just wanted me (and the rest of the cafe?) to know she was being supportive.

I have breastfed both of my children’s for years. In that time, I’ve only ever had one negative encounter, and that was with an elderly lady in Ikea who told me it was ‘disgusting’. I told her to fuck off, and off she went.

Everyone else, of all ages and creeds I have encountered have always either been friendly and smiled, or actually for the most part, just not noticed or cared what I was doing.

I breastfed in public, all over the place, on public transport, out in the open etc and nobody ever batted an eyelid. In fact people would bring me a glass of water sometimes!

I combi fed though and found people were much less encouraging about giving a baby a bottle and I encountered some really nasty comments about that.

Had a few nervous waiters offering me glasses of water somewhat compulsively every ten minutes, but other than that, no issues at all once I got the hang of it - the first time I tried to feed ds I had to lie him on a table and lean over and it was all tricky and squirty - so very glad the staff at a cafe and then a supermarket cafe left me to it in a booth.

As time went on I did find lots of friends or family asking if I didn't have any bad experiences - they didn't have a problem, honest, they were just worried about what all those other people might say and seemed a tad miffed when I didn't have any problems...

I breastfed both of mine, in several countries and in lots of public places. I was always very disappointed that I never received any negativity, I would have loved a good arguement 😅

Babies need to eat and the vast majority of people don't really even notice. Never feel ashamed or embarrassed or awkward 😊

Bf my my son easily from day one, never thought twice about doing it in public. Didn’t cover up either (although DS head was in the way anyway). No one ever commented!

I used a cover or a muslin when feeding in public, including once on a busy train. Never had any looks or comments.

3 babies all bf in public until well into second year maybe 20iah months never a comment.

Saw a documentary on channel four recently about it - you should take a look think it was dispatches.

The presenter said what are they scared of ? “the fear they might see my nipple.... well they won’t”

So just go find somewhere comfortable and get on with it - look at your baby, book, phone and enjotn

Never had any comments. My boobs were too small (b cup at most) to do the top up, vest down thing as the top always slid down and got in the way. Also didn't get on with covers as I got tangled and dd didn't like being covered. This meant that quite a lot of my boob was on display as I usually wore a shirt and pulled my vest down on one side. I don't get changed in public change rooms, would never go topless on a beach or anything but I just forced myself to not let anything stop me feeding wherever I happened to be.

I've been bf for 2.5 yrs. I plucked up the courage to bf in public when my baby was about a month old and never looked back! It's really liberating not to have to rush home for feeds etc! My main advice is not to look at anyone else, just concentrate on you and your baby. If you don't look at others then you won't be analysing their reactions etc!

Never used a cover. In summer used a Muslin to cover any exposed boob. In winter used nursing tops and the 'one up one down' method.

BF 4 babies for 8ish years. Experienced some anti BF stuff during the first 2 yrs, I was a young first [single] mum, determined to BF age 17 with a mother who thought breastfeeding was disgusting! Got asked to leave or feed 1st DD in restaurant and shop loos so as a young mum my middle finger got plenty of activity and DD1 got her milk anytime she wanted. After that I BF 2xDD and 1xDS. DS was small [5.5kg] and I always [once my undeveloped body realised what was happening] produced a shit load of milk, he didn't even suck and I was so worried until the HV turned up and asked to see DS feed. Her response of 'o wow, he doesn't even need to suck, you have so much milk' reassured me so much. Not sure how relevant that was...
I BF 4 babies anywhere they wanted and so should every BFing mum.

Also, never used a cover, seen women using them, they make feel sad.
Top and skirt or jeans equals 'discreet' BF, simple as that.

It was nerve wracking at first but I found if I focused on the baby and didn’t look around at others I just relaxed and it was fine.
If I couldn’t see people reacting (don’t know if anyone ever did) it bothered me less and less, it also helped that my partner was very supportive and used to say “you just feed her love, let me worry about everyone else.” 😍

No one commented or cared. A lady offered to open my boxed sandwich as O was struggling with one hand whilst holding a feedind dd2 in the other. That was it.

I've only ever had the odd friendly smile. One person has commented and she said well done and it was a beautiful sight

OP this was my main reservation about breastfeeding - the public part. I have anxiety too and really struggle with my body so obviously having a part of it no one usually sees out in the open was very daunting. I avoided it as much as I could but then we went out for a meal when DD was 5 days old and she was desperate to be fed so I just had to get on with it, sat in the middle of an Italian restaurant on a Friday night. A teenage boy noticed and went very obviously red and looked everywhere but my boob

Since then I've done it everywhere - including places I never thought I'd have to like on the beach and in a church yard! Never ever had a single problem. Most people don't even notice, or if they do notice they look away.

Good luck with it. It's all fine

I've breastfed for nearly 2 years in total and will feed anywhere. I wouldn't say I'm particularly discreet about it either! I've never had any negative comments or even as far as I can tell negative attention of any kind - mostly just friendly smiles from women (and the occasional man). One woman even once commented to me on how nice it was to see someone BF so confidently in public, and I've had a man comment on what a good thing I'm doing for my baby's health by BF :)

Just today I had a lovely older lady come over to me, after I had been breastfeeding my daughter in a cafe, saying it’s lovely to see someone breastfeeding in public, there’s too much negativity but I think it’s great and when gave me a big smile and thumbs up. I nearly dissolved into tears! She had also complimented my 22 month old son on his good behaviour and eating so it was great to have someone come over especially to spread some kindness.

I’ve never experienced anyone even batting an eyelid. Buy some nursing vests from H&M and you can just wear them under your regular clothes and everything stays hidden.

Oh and I used a feeding cape. It made me feel more comfortable as I was worried I might bump into the pupils I teach and I didnt want immature 14 year olds talking about my nipples. I did get another bf mother tell me it was wrong to use it and liken it to me eating my dinner with a blanket on my head. I burst out laughing. The only negative comment I'd recieved came from a breastfeeding mother. I loved my cape and had no intention of removing it just so that I could be a breastfeeding warrior. The cape was for me, the milk was for my baby. No one elses opinion mattered.

Only ever had positive comments feeding my daughter and son. I had a man come over to me once when feeding DD at doctors before 8 week jabs and I was worried he would say something mean. He was an older and quite frail looking chap and he leant forward and said he just wanted to tell me I was doing a wonderful job looking after my little baby.
I once frightened the life out of someone when I was feeding my then 6 month old daughter outside the changing room in Debenhams as my baby finished and sat up letting out a big burp. The man sat next to me visibly jumped as he hadn't even realised she was there as she was curled up against me and had put her feet inside my jacket.

Most recently I have fed my 5 month old son at a wedding during the ceremony and speeches, at synagogue and on various buses and trains and in an art gallery. No negative comments but had a couple of women give me big smiles and had a lovely woman come up to me in schul to say how nice it was to see a mum and her baby so happy and that it was great I could feed him as soon as he was hungry. It makes my day when people say nice things like that!

ive fed mine in public loads - with my daughter i was nervous and used a cover till she was 1, then one day i lost the cover and she was hungry - i did it and no one cared. From then - i fed without a cover. Ive fed while walking up grocery shopping, ive fed while talking to strangers - no one cared. With my son (hes 23 months now) i never used a cover. Again - no one either notices/cares.

I breastfed both DS and DD. No one ever said anything and I think most people just didn’t notice

Completely fine, honestly I’ve never really even thought about it, just did. I’ve bf everywhere. In the pub with a glass of wine in the other hand. At dinner with my BIL and dh’s uni mates. The middle of Waitrose. The beach, benches in town, etc.

I’ve never had anyone even stare. Definitely no one has ever made a comment. Though to be fair, I definitely look like someone who might punch you in the face for an inappropriate comment so that probably helps!

When in doubt, the car or the children’s section at the library always works for a quiet place to feed, or a tucked away corner of the park. I’ve never used a cover.

I think just go for it. Once you get over feeling self conscious that people might be looking, you’ll likely realise they don’t even notice.