To ask for your breastfeeding in public experiences?

[AlwaysFuckingTired]

Currently BF 3 week old DD2. I avoided BF in public with DD1 as much as possible due to anxiety about how people would react, but this led to me doing ridiculous things like feeding her in a toilet so I've decided I'm going to be braver this time.

How did you find BF in public? Did you get any unkind looks or comments? Did you use a cover or not?

I'm still breastfeeding DS age 2.4, I probably breastfed him in public toll 18-20 months. Across 2 countries I've not had a single negative comment and lots of positive ones (mainly from the older generation like MILs friends or DGMs friends who'd reminiced about feeding their own DC)

I breastfed both of mine to well over a year and fed anywhere. No comments or looks. I think most people think that you're giving them a cuddle.

I was super conscious in the early days and used to cover eith a large muslin but got better as be got bigger and we got better at latching on
The top and vest combo then worked well for us. I was more self conscious about keeping my tummy coveted tbh.

Today my now 4yr old fell off his bike whilst at the park and badly cut his lip and had bleeding gums.
After the bleeding had slowed down he had some milk to help comfort and settle him.

I would be it Iying if I said I wasn't a bit conscious of feeding him, but nothing would stop me from meeting his needs as a baby or now.

My best advice would be to take it till you make it.
I plant a soft smile on my face and make myself look relaxed and chat to him and whoever I am with at the time.
It really does help

I'm two weeks in and have fed her a few times in public. No one has noticed so far although I have been trying to use a wrap but to be fair that seems like more faff than its worth. I'm struggling with how to fold my bra cup down tho that doesn't hinder her latching on if anyone has any tips?

@AlwaysFuckingTired i did, never even thought about it. I BF in
Costa
On the beach
Frankie and Benny's
Round friends/family houses whilst my 3 year old niece sat as close as possible asking all about it

Just don't even think about it, just do as you would at home. I used to get her latched on then cover my shoulder/her head with a blanket or muslin just for my own comfort.

*fake it till you make it

I don’t really have any experiences to tell. I fed my babies in public, no one cared, it was fine.

The one handed uncliping bra and pushing it and vest under boob just takes practice.
Promise, in a few months it just becomes muscle memory.

Can you get to any feeding groups near you?

I've been breastfeeding for a total of 3 years between my 2 DC. We live in London and I feel like there is nowhere I haven't fed! I generally use the vest down, top up method but sometimes just whack out a boob - particularly in this hot weather. Each to their own but I actually think if you use a cover you draw way more attention than if you don't.

It's tricky when they're newborn and they flail around with their arms in the way etc but the more you practice the slicker you get.

I've fed my 3mo on a full bus this week, the very kind lady next to me gave me a tissue when I realised he muslin was in the pram at the front of the bus! I never thought I'd do that, but I've got quite fast at the top up/ top down now and the baby was crying at the start of an hour long bus ride so whatcha gonna do?

I've built up bit by bit in quiet places first, quite a lot of alfresco dining with the hot weather, today I manage do to eat my lunch one handed while BF.

Bfing my first I was once presented with a huge slab of chocolate cake and a cup of tea, complements of a kind old lady.

I also had a rather ferocious letdown that hit some poor old man in Costa. I could have died with embarrassment but he didn't even look up, reaches into his pocket and pulled out a hankie, wiped his face and continued his conversation as if nothing had happened.

Fed in public for about 3 years now across 2 babies, rarely used a cover. I've had many encouraging smiles and probably 3 or 4 comments, all positive. Usually older or elderly women telling me how nice it is to see someone BF and/or reminiscing about BFing their own DC.

I had no negative experiences. No staring and certainly no comments.

I would recommend getting along to some breastfeeding groups or cafes - you might not need support with the feeding itself but it's a good way to get used to latching on in public in a safe environment

Top tip I heard, if you're really not confident in public (and remember you are covered by the law) feeding in a clothes shop changing room is a good option ... better than a toilet!

I breast fed two kids in public. With my first I was nervous so just had a Muslin over my shoulder/boob til he was latched on then took it off (as they get so hot when feeding!).

Fed on buses, in restaurants, pubs etc. never had any comments ever!

I breastfed most of mine most places and never used a cover. No one ever said anything except a few of the older generation that said it was lovely to see me feeding my baby. Most of the time, I used it as an excuse for a coffee and sat quietly in a corner, I was feeding DD2 in a pub and my food came, the young guy who put my food in front of me didn’t bat an eyelid.
I can recommend the Facebook group, can I breastfeed in this.

I fed DD for 16 months in all sorts of places e.g on public transport, in shopping centres, supermarkets, school concerts and even on the school run in the sling.

Never got one comment or look (aside from my family who are very anti-breastfeeding ) and most people didn't even notice as they'd speak to us then apologise for intruding when they got close enough to register :o

I never used a cover as they just look such a faff, I did use the one up/one down method, wear a vest top under usual top t-shirt and pull top up and vest down, for my own comfort though.

I was pretty fortunate as i never had any negative reactions. Some of my best experiences were becoming a regular in Cafe Nero to the point where I'd sit down start BFing and have a latte and water bought over to me and I'd pay on way out or there was a time when I was getting flustered that I couldn't get my top undone whilst holding DS so this woman came over and helped me then fetched me a water as she remembered how thirsty she got when BFing and basically wherever I went I was always offered water because everywhere seemed to know if be thirsty haha (which I was! Always!).

Don't get me wrong, I was nervous at first and it took me a while before i was able to BF all smooth and there were difficult times too (I recall having to sit on someone's garden wall to BF on my walk to town as DS was screaming blue murder).

It takes practice, is hard work and you might flash nipple here and there (DS moved far too much too quickly!) But overall I had nothing but support.

I’ve fed all over, but the place I was most concerned about was church.

The flipping priest noticed and managed to shoe horn mothers feeding their babies with love into his sermon and the lady in the pew behind put her hand on my shoulder and said in my ear ‘I think that was for your benefit my dear’. It’s his last week next week and I’ll miss him.

Other than that the only comment I’ve had was when I was lent against a tree in a park and an old guy came over to look at the tree, then he apologised profusely for disturbing the baby as he didn’t realise I was feeding. He reminisced about his wife feeding their children and kindlyvaverted his eyes when DC2 movrdcso I flashed him!

Any where and everywhere. No problems or comments

Publicly breastfed all three of mine (currently still feeding number 3) and never had a negative comment or look. Nobody even remotely cares.

I use a cover if it’s sunny just to shield little eyes but I mostly do it in the sling as it’s easier, but sometimes if he’s in his pram I’ll just take him out and do it normally

I was nervous too but I have a 7 week old baby and never had a problem. Had to breastfeed a lot in public. I use a large muslin to cover and invested in suitable feeding clothes/ bras. Latching on can be quite tricky to do discreetly but I’ve stopped caring now, would rather stop my baby crying.

Please don’t feed your baby in the toilets. I think the breastfeeding in public negativity is very much a media thing and (hopefully) something you are unlikely to experience in real life.

I have in the past Bf in public loads & never had any looks/comments-I have a 'fuck off' face though.

Am currently bfing my 4th. Like you, I found it weird in public at first, but soon got used to it. I have bf friendly tops (often available 2nd hand on Ebay, it that helps).

I have a Bebe Au Lait cover, but mostly don't use it. I just keep it in the change bag in case I feel I want to be extra discreet, e.g. if next to a group of teenage boys!

And no, never had a negative look or comment.

Yeah I don't understand this huge backlash against bf negativity at the moment. I've not had any negative comments either, only people trying to help if I'm struggling. I tried using scarves and it's a nightmare. So i bought an infinity scarf (loop of material) and it's so much easier.

Bear2014 when do they stop flailing and keep their hands out of the way? I'm not there yet.