To feel a bit unimpressed with partner over this?

[Firenzee]

Friends coming over for Sunday lunch. Was going to be barbeque but forecast here is rain so have a back up plan in case.

I've spent the day cleaning house- I do that normally on a Sat but have done extra as visitors coming. Tomorrow I'm mowing lawns and tidying garden, popping to shops for stuff I forgot or couldn't get today, and then prepping food.

While I rushed around today my DP came over mid afternoon and kicked back watching tv/ playing on the ps4. Tomorrow he's coming over when friends are due so clearly I won't get any help tomorrow either.

What makes it worse is his family are staying about 20 miles away, he's arranged we go and see them tomorrow evening meaning I will have to tell friends to leave at 5 (they're only getting to me at 2) so we can get there. Family could have come here but he insists we go there instead. Then I hear him on the phone talking to his family about the barbecue (which if we do it he was going to cook for, men and fire etc) saying oh yeah well if it rains I just won't bother with the whole afternoon

Am I just tired and worn out and therefore being over sensitive or is this a bit shit?

If he cares so little about socialising with your friends now, he probably isn't going to change once you move in with him - it will just become more difficult for you to get this kind of social event organised.

Agree with Happy, it's not just about whether he is 'doing chores' at your house but the fact that he (or anyone visiting your home for that matter) is just prepared to sit on his backside gaming whilst you are busy ... it's not just about gaming although any adult gaming seriously irritates me but if he was just reading the paper or watching tv whilst you were rushing about shows an uncaring and generally unsupportive attitude. Do you really want to share your life with someone like that?

Op, I think you need to think about what's acceptable in a relationship.

From his perspective this isn't his house why should he pitch in?

Why should he pitch in? Because he loves you and likes doing things for you?

If i were comfortable enough in someone's house to spend hours watching TV or gaming then I would also help with jobs. Before dp and I lived together we used to stay over and if something needed washing up I'd do it. I decorated his spare bedroom and he put up shelves and made flat pack furniture with me in mine. It's just what loving partners do.

He's having his cake and eating it with respect to your house.

It isn't his house so why should he bother to help, yet he feels sufficiently at home to cook in a better kitchen and have you clear up, or sit on his arse gaming in your front room. Sounds like he sees you and your house as leisure facilities for him to take advantage of.