I've just shouted at my son for hiding and jumping out at me

[mydogmymate]

My ds (11) has taken to hiding then jumping out on me. He sits on the stairs and I know he's there but he doesn't answer me. Then, when I least expect it, he jumps out at me or suddenly appears at the door.

I know he's only 11, but the first time he did it I explained that I don't like it and he seemed to get it. Now today, he's done it about 5 times and my nerves are in shreds. Each time he insists he's only joking, but it's just not funny. He did it again about 10 minutes ago and I shouted at him, now he's in his room sulking and said I'm no fun.

Have I overreacted?

I thjnk the suggestions to knee him in the face were said tongue in cheek, i doubt anyone actually meant it

No one is forcing you to read it Cherryminx.

Yanbu.
9yo does this all the time, comes up right behind me and ‘rah’.
So. Fucking. Annoying.

My oldest girl went through a phase of doing this to me and her younger sister. She thought it was funny until I explained some of the ways people might react, like hitting out, panic attacks, or in my case an asthma attack whilst literally pissing myself. She stopped because she didn't want to mop up a puddle.

Yanbu.
My 11yr old DS did this a couple of times. I read him the riot act on it. He didn't do it again.

Anyone remember the fainting goats? Faint when startled. Find your inner fainting goat op.

Back in the bad old days, when I was hyper vigilant due to living in interesting times, DW surprised me from behind. Luckily, because she'd worked with dementia and brain injured patients, she realised what I was about to do and dodged. I was horrified of course, when I was able to think straight.

After that, there were no practical jokes, and we kept to it after DD came along. She inflicted many cruelties during her teenage years, but not those ones. As well as that, I work in an industry where horseplay kills.

If you’ve told him no lots of times, he needs to listen.

My MIL did this to me the other day - I squealed, shouted ‘fuck’, and got admonished for bad language around the kids.

Wh...what is this thread? Is it a joke?

You’ll know you’ll probably find if you just ignore him he’ll get bored and go and do something else...

Baffled, I am.

My 9 year old did it I screamed so Loud I scared him to tears 🤦‍♀️

So have you knee'd him in the head yet?

Bloody hell is literally everyone pissed?

Of course op shouldn't knee her ds in the face. But neither should she put up with his nonsense. Where do you think all these men who don't understand consent come from? Ds doesn't g t to do what he wants just because he wants to, and OP doesn't have to make behaviour she doesn't like into a game.

Kneeing him in the head doesn't seem popular. Maybe hit him with a frying pan instead

Suppose the DS is too tall to knee in the head?

QueenDoris

I think it is a learning opportunity when in the car next/ad break on TV. Tell him that even if he finds something hysterically funny, if it makes the other person feel bad, humiliated, frightened or embarrassed then it isn't a joke, it's just being mean. Him thinking it's funny doesn't mean the other person "can't take a joke" it means HE is reading the situation incorrectly and he needs to reset his boundaries. "I was just joking" or "can't you take a joke" or "you're no fun" are never excuses for his behaviour. If he oversteps someone's comfort zone, the comeback should always be "I'm sorry". His friends might be all "up for it" but that doesn't mean you are, grandma is or other friends are.

And it also goes to that basic respect for others, if you are making someone feel uncomfortable, afraid, nervous (especially their own mother in her own home) that makes him disrespectful and is not a nice character trait to foster.

If you feel he's mature enough, I might also work in how women feel vulnerable sometimes, and for that instant when he scares you, you don't know if it is an intruder and that instinctual reaction stays with you long beyond the "prank", it flashes back when you are the first home to an empty house, in a dark street or at other times. It makes you genuinely frightened. Hopefully he sees why that joke "isn't funny" or "you're no fun".

It is annoying and unpleasant. It must be nipped in the bud now. He is lucky you weren't carrying anything and didn't react by hitting out. I once hit a friend who thought similar was funny, it was an instinctive reaction. I had been daydreaming so she really shocked me.

Fuck me, hope nobody on this thread ever comes to my house!

We all sneak up and scare each other, it’s great fun because none of us are fucking pansies.

Yep you sound the sensitive type Captn and I expect all the swearing makes you feel great too

Fuck me, hope nobody on this thread ever comes to my house!

Well, that makes two of us....... I find people who like practical jokes really tiring.

Mine used to do that to me and it used to wind me up. However the difference is you have asked yours to stop but he is carrying on. You have made it clear that you don't like it
In your shoes I would tell him calmly not to do it again otherwise there will be a consequence ( and tell him what it is) if he does it again do the consequence. If it continues increase the consequence.

Mine still jumps out on me occasionally and hwe 18. I just call him a knob now! ( the insult of the day in our house now they are adults!)

My son (12) hid in the recess of the stairs dressed in black. I didn't turn the light on and I pass by him then he tap my back.
I was so scared I cried. He was so upset because I was crying that he hasn't done it since.

@mydogmymate if he scares you again just drop to the floor like you fainted. Stay down for a minute or so. Give him a good fright.
Normally I wouldn't condone scaring a child but he isn't learning how awful it is.

@BiggerandBetter

Put your pearls down, dear.