Only on MN ...

[cathf]

Not a TAAT as such, but inspired by a response on a thread running at the moment.
It got me thinking of the differences between MN and my RL friends and acquaintances, and things that are accepted wisdom on MN that no-one I know in real life cares about at all.
I will start off:

1. Little girls who wear pink clothing, and gendered clothing in general;
2. Scented sanitary towels;
3. Fruit Shoots
4. People cuddling/touching/talking to your child;

The amount of threads and angst over these topics is staggering, yet no-one I know would even think any of the above were worth discussing, never mind getting worked up about. Anymore?

@Donthugmeimscared I asked for ideas of what I can do with my children over the holidays with no money and that I had no garden.

Some of the suggestions were gardening, getting a trampoline and a padding pool.

I realised a long time ago that many people here don't answer the question that was asked, they answer the one that fits what they wanted to say.

If you all hate scented sanitary towels, why do you buy them?

Only on MN does laundry get “darked on”.

Also the thing about leaving washing on the line overnight - it will get 'darked on' is that the correct phrase?

I've never heard anyone say that irl, I tend to always get my washing in but on the rare occasion I have forgotten and left it outside it seems perfectly fine the next morning!

I have no experience of scented sanitary towels personally, but DD1 really struggles with them and had enough problems getting ordinary ones that she wasn't allergic to. She can't use tampons, either. Nor do I fancy using a mooncup, so I am even more grateful of an early hysterectomy all those years ago.

I am estranged from my brother and have been for almost a decade. It hurts, but it is what it is. He can't forgive me for something that had nothing to do with me and I can't forget the things he said to me - and in a letter, not verbally.

I don't get the not visiting a new baby thing at all. I have never met anyone who did this.

I frequently was 'that parent' when my kids were at school, but mostly because DD1 had life threatening allergies which the school couldn't be bothered to pay attention to and so she had a few scary times. Then for DD2 because the same school didn't do anything to help her dyslexia. They said it was a 2 year wait for testing at one specific centre used by the council and they weren't allowed to recommend any other children and you couldn't go yourself. So I moved her to a different school in the same local authority and she was tested, in school, within 20 minutes and given the help she needed. So sometimes it pays to be 'that parent'.

I’ve noticed a recent trend of “should I go to the school/A&E/the police about this” which provokes an utter deluge of “no, of course not, don’t be stupid, you’re what’s wrong with this country”, only for, halfwaybdown the thread, someone to come and say “I’m a police officer/A&E nurse/teacher and honestly we see people come to us with this all the tine, it’s fine, totally normal, don’t worry” - who is then roundly ignored while the thread keepers pile on the OP.

The issue is usually something anyone would have gone to get dealt with but the OP has been out off by all the MN judges tutting about similar.

Chalady if drunk with a meal, there's not much difference. My DC are only allowed sugary things with or after a meal, with the exception of DS1, as he needed regular high fat snacks because he has cystic fibrosis. He had his own cupboard full of Mars bars and Monster Munch. He's now an adult, and not at home, so it's no longer my problem. He brushed his teeth well, drank water after snacks and saw the dentist every 3 months. He has perfect teeth at 27.

Baby wearing quite common in the part of the ‘up north’ I’m from. Not seen any babies with ear piercings either but wouldn’t care if I did.

Baby wearers are so disbelieving that some babies don’t like them. ‘That’s not possible you must be doing it wrong” as he screams blue murder craning his neck and trying to wriggle his limbs out.

The piercing one reminds me of another mn classic. Headbands for baby girls. The soft loose material will hurt their tiny skulls apparently. The mums are always too stupid—read working class— to take the things off when the baby is asleep too . No-one in real life has expressed this opinion to me.

Scented pads are the worst I had to drive a girl to MIU when I was at uni, because she had such severe irritation from her pad and just shaving. It was awful.
And that aside they make you itch I hate them.

Sleephead I had to go NC with DM and DS1 on police advice.

Only on MN does laundry get “darked on”

well it's actually only a 'thing' because of one thread were the OP mentioned darked on and MN said errr what? then the thread was quite funny with posters talking spiders wiping their willies on the washing.

'darker on' is now a MN in joke.

What exactly IS the point of a baby hairband though? Babies have no hair.

Again I wouldn't say anything in real life but I would think how stupid it was.

Equally I wouldn't say anything to parents that got their babies ears pierced, but I'd be thinking it.

@Fresta

Rooms set on fire the minute you leave your child alone.

I posted on a thread previously where I said that I leave my 2yo watching TV while I go upstairs to do laundry/tidy etc and sometimes pop on the front to chat to neighbours and the response I got from some posters was fucking incredible apparently every 2yo is programmed to kill themselves as soon as a parent turns around. I don't think they had ever met a 2yo, you can't prize them away from a telly for love nor money.

So people stopped saying that she was a boy. It does hurt, despite what MN seems to think.

So, OP, you are essentially asking whether your limited circle of acquaintances is more accurately representative of general opinion than a forum with thousands and thousands of people from all walks of life and multiple countries? Ummm... nope!

Also, as many people have pointed out, lots of your acquaintances probably have opinions you're not aware of. Not necessarily because they are deliberately hiding them, but because people don't share their opinions on every detail all the time and also are more inclined to be forthright about things on an anonymous forum.

Honestly I'm not having a go, but why does it hurt that people thought your baby daughter was a boy?

Surely all babies look the same, small, bald and chubby? EVERYONE thought my ds was a girl until he was about 4. To be honest he did look more like a girl, but so what?

I can't understand why it matters what a baby looks like.

Ok so hairbands are no huge deal but I can't imagine they're too comfortable for the baby and it just makes you seem as though you care more about the babies appearance than their comfort.

From page one

Even thought the label says spring water and fruit juice hmm these MNers don't like to read labels on food do they

Actually I think most people with even half a brain would read that description with a healthy degree of scepticism.

I think this thread is kinda weird cos whichever side of a debate you’re on, you’re probably surrounded by likeminded people, and tend to notice people on here with a different opinion because it’s new.

For example, if you’re a parent who feeds your kids junk food most of the time (chicken nuggets and chips for example) you’re gonna say ‘only on MN do parents feed their kids rabbit food for their packed lunch, everyone I know in real life just gives them a ham sandwich and a bag of crisps’

But if you’re someone who does go to the effort of making more adventurous lunches, no doubt you’ll say ‘only on MN do parents think it’s okay to feed their kids crap for lunch every day!’ because they’ll notice the barrage of posters mocking and jeering at the one who admits to making hummus or god forbid hummus and olive sandwiches for their kid’s lunch.

My contribution was gonna be ‘only on mn do people get precious about only ever seeing a female doctor for smears etc’ cos nobody I know in real life would even stop to consider that their GP being a man would be a problem. But I knew if I’d said that someone else would come in with ‘only on MN are people totally blasé about seeing male doctors for intimate problems, everyone I know IRL would only see a woman for that’ so both sides think they’re the norm equally!

Same with the vagina/vulva thing. I’ve never heard anyone refer to their overall genitals as their vagina, yet when people on here point out the correct names for female anatomy there’s a rush of ‘oh for gods sake everyone calls it a vagina we all know what that means’.

We are all living in little bubbles usually surrounded by people with similar experiences and views and educational levels to us. So it’s a real shock to the system when you’re exposed to different views on here for some. There’s also so much awful chippy reverse snobbery on MN. I see more people sneering at what they perceive to be middle class activities or practices than I do people sneering at what they perceive to be working class activities or practices.

I accidentally bought scented sanitary towels and the painful itch was awful.
They work quite well as moth repellent though.
Fruit shoots are an occasional thing for us, I'm not a popular enough person to worry about a deluge of visitors after having my child and I've never used zooflora.
I do have a friend who really should go NC, or at the very least severely minimal contact, with her relatives but guilt won't let her. Others keep piling on the guilt with "famerleee are impoooortant" stuff. Never mind they're vile, sometimes dangerous people who won't change.
Hey ho.

@feckingfeckers I also live up North, have used a baby carrier (was just easier when walking our big dog off-road) but also have a pram. I don’t know and haven’t seen any babies with pierced ears in any of our baby groups/ classes we did - not that I would judge but it isn’t my cup of tea.

Also can I add you definitely wouldn’t call us hippie types if you knew us IRL 👍

"Log it with the police". Never even heard of this on real low. MN seems to think the police just have limitless time and records to keep a log of every little thing each bad neighbour or crazy parent in their area does!

Surely it's either bad enough to call the police out or it's not

*in real life

Tallzara I don't know, but it did. If DD pulled it off, I wouldn't put it back on, she actually didn't notice it most of the time. I just find it weird that you can put a baby in a dress and people still say, "What a handsome boy." WTAF???

I've never bought fruit shoots before but my mum recently bought us some in a multipack. It clearly states no added sugar on the box and reading the nutritional information shows that carbs from sugars are 0.8g per 100mls so I can't say I'm too worried about DD drinking them occasionally. I'm more upset about the wasteful use of plastic tbh.