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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Dog sitting, is she a CF?

204 replies

Fucketbucket13 · 13/08/2018 18:46

My cousin asked me to dog sit months ago. I said I guess I would but I'm fairly busy. She said her mum would help out walking the dog so I agreed.
I live with my mum while I save for a deposit on a house so I thought it'd be a chance to have a break from each other even though we get on well. I'll still pay her rent as it is cheap and she still has all the bills to pay.

I've just turned up at my cousin's and she's left me a loaf of bread, a pint of milk and a bloody box of chocolates to eat. Nothing else no cheese, ham, salad stuff, potatoes nothing. The fridge is empty as is the freezer. I'm bloody annoyed I'm going to have to go out and buy a weeks worth of food so while saving my cousin over a £100 it's going to cost me at least £50!

Àibu to expect if you're dog sitting for free they should at least leave you food? She's even told me where the vac is so I'll clean for her!

OP posts:
Original poster
Fucketbucket13 · 14/08/2018 10:11

I'm getting nothing out of it. I have to get up an hour earlier to walk her. The house is tiny, the dog won't leave me alone, she is very cute though.
I let a dog out for a freind a few weeks ago ago he gave me £10. Another friend stocked the fridge up for me then took me out for a thankyou meal. I guess I've been spoilt doing dog sitting for people Wink
Although I live with my mum the house is big enough that we have out own space so no problem there.
I live in a beautiful location so don't need a holiday.

I've said no on many occasions as I do find it hard juggling work and walking the dog.

I've just gotta get on with it this week anyway and say no in future.

Thanks to all who agreed with me. I can't believe the people who leave their precious animals with people and think they're doing the sitters a favour.

OP posts:
MargotLovedTom1 · 14/08/2018 10:26

OK so you've said your mother charges you a small amount of rent (which obviously includes bills and food) so you can save to buy a house. You're benefitting from your mother's generosity. Think of this favour you're doing for your cousin as 'paying it forward' if that's not too sick making.

12stars · 14/08/2018 10:28

I can't believe the people who leave their precious animals with people and think they're doing the sitters a favour.

But in some situations it is doing them a favour. However as you have pointed out it isn't in your case. So best to say no in future. In our current situation the couple staying in our house actually asked if they could stay at ours and when we realised the dates coincided with when we were away everyone was happy. We get our cats fed and they get a place to stay for a week.

IamPickleRick · 14/08/2018 11:24

My aunt letting me stay at hers for a week was a massive favour. My mums house was awful. Does your cousin know you don’t pay for your own food? Maybe that’s why she didn’t stock up, because she thought you’d be buying it anyway?

ScienceIsTruth · 14/08/2018 11:58

The OP is still paying her mum her rent, which includes money for her food, so she's paying twice (in effect).

She's also doing it for free, and walking the dog several times a day, whilst still working her day job as well.

It would've been nice if she'd at least been left some fruit, veg, ham, cheese, maybe some chicken, as well as the basics such as bread, milk, eggs, butter, tea, coffee.

Even if she'd spent £25 stocking up for the OP, that's about a day's wages for a paid dog sitter to come to your house for one overnight, let alone a week.

OP, YADNBU, but at least if there's a next time you'll know to ask about the finer details, and what's expected/being offered.

heartsease68 · 14/08/2018 12:43

I let a dog out for a freind a few weeks ago ago he gave me £10.

And you took it?? [wow]

ferrier · 14/08/2018 14:16

YANBU OP. I can't believe the number of CFs who'd get a friend to dog sit, including three walks a day, for no money and no food. The bare minimum should be a well stocked fridge or a decent payment.

MargotLovedTom1 · 14/08/2018 15:27

Well, if it's that much of an issue the OP can ask her mother if she can reduce her rent for the week because she's not going to be eating there. Is the OP's mother a cheeky cow for pocketing money for food that the OP won't be eating? Just seems like making a mountain out of a molehill to me.

Kidssendingmenuts · 14/08/2018 15:29

Sorry but even if you were a professional pet sitter in someone else's home you provide your own food. Just the way it is.

mydogisthebest · 14/08/2018 15:57

Kidsending, not necessarily true. If you look at dog sitting/house sitting sites they often say that you are expected to provide food. I looked into getting a house sitter and decided that around £80 a day plus providing food was just too expensive.

Even if food is not expected to be provided the amount a professional dog or house sitter charges is high. The OP is getting paid nothing

Booboostwo · 14/08/2018 17:00

Kids not in my experience. I have employed pet sitters for the past 20plus years and the food allowance was extra to the fees.

spiderplantsgalore · 14/08/2018 17:21

Sorry but even if you were a professional pet sitter in someone else's home you provide your own food

If you were a professional dog sitter maybe, but the point is OP isn't, and isn't being paid, so it's pretty mean to not leave some food.

Darkautumn · 14/08/2018 17:29

Why can't you go pick up your food from your mum's place, or ask your mum to drop some of your food round? Confused

dotdotdot3 · 14/08/2018 17:35

I agree there is no obligation for your friend to leave food, but I would definitely leave you basics (fresh veg, dairy, bread, tins of tomatoes, breakfast stuff etc) and I'd probably ask you what you liked to eat and make sure I'd left you the ingredients for at least two of your favourite meals. I would want you to feel comfortable and relaxed, mainly out of gratitude, but also because if you're happy, the dog's happy Grin

Some people are mean, OP

adaline · 14/08/2018 17:38

Why on earth would you expect her to buy you food?

My SIL comes to look after our cats when we're away - she comes in twice a day to feed them, top up their water and sort their litter trays. She'll also do things like vacuum and air the house and such. We've never left her food - we'll bring her back a present and get her some of her alcohol of choice but that's about it. We've offered payment and she's declined it.

How would she know what food you'd like or want? Surely it would be a total waste of her to buy food if you didn't end up eating it?

TBH though, I'm surprised you let your mum do your food shopping for you - I lived at home for a while after a break-up and I paid rent and did my own food shopping. I can't imagine wanting another adult to buy my food for me!

HeckyPeck · 14/08/2018 22:28

I’m shocked at the amount of people that would expect friends/family to dog sit + 3 walks a day for a week and leave no food apart from some biscuits! And expect them to clean your house for you 😂

There’s 0 chance that I would hoover. I would however eat the tin of lentils and the tuna and anything else edible. Although from some responses on here some posters would expect you to get a full shop in as a favour for being allowed to scoop up your counsin’s dogs poo all week!

Original poster
Fucketbucket13 · 15/08/2018 06:58

Heartseas68 yes I did. He offered me £20 which I refused but he insisted on paying me £10.
@heckpeck me neither. I'm also expected to give the house a full clean, pay her for the gas/electric and leave her a thankyou card Grin that's AIBU for you it's not for the faint hearted!

They must live where people are just dying to dog sit in someone's house for free. I know people who are struggling to find sitters/kennels.

I didn't expect a full M & S shops just a few bits, the fridge and freezer were literally empty.

I've now been shopping, dog walked at 6 am and I've got her a bottle of wine and flowers as a thankyou for letting me dog sit (sarcasm)

OP posts:
feral · 15/08/2018 07:14

Why would you expect your cousin to feed you?

I've dog sat for friends and fed myself. I also wouldn't be paying rent when I'm doing someone a favour!

So basically no money exchanges hands, your rent is the favour.

Original poster
Fucketbucket13 · 15/08/2018 07:22

@feral read my posts. Do you have a dog?

OP posts:
bbcessex · 15/08/2018 07:24

I can’t believe anyone thinks this is ok 😱😱

OP - you are completely right. If your cousin is skint she doesn’t have to stock up with smoked salmon & caviar, but a tenner on cheese, ham, spuds, butter & salad stuff would have made all the difference.

bbcessex · 15/08/2018 07:29

There is a MASSIVE difference between regularly dog sitting for long periods as a way of living, versus those who agree it as a favour for friends / family.

The first, it’s of benefit to the sitter. The second, it’s an upheaval to their daily life and done out of love... gratitude from the owner should be given in buckets (and food!)

sueelleker · 15/08/2018 07:33

I hope you're going to take home the rest of the food you bought!

TheNoodlesIncident · 15/08/2018 07:57

Hang on, your cousin expects you to pay towards the gas/electricity while you are walking her dog three times a day for free...?!

Outrageous. YANBU op, that's a massive piss take on your cousin's part. Shock Tell her you're skint too...

mydogisthebest · 15/08/2018 08:03

adeline, how about the dog owner asked what food the OP likes? How difficult is that?

Or she could have left food items that most people eat - eggs, cheese, frozen pizza.

Do people post ridiculous replies just to get a reaction or are they really that stupid and argumentative in real life?

Original poster
Fucketbucket13 · 15/08/2018 08:21

@thenoodlesincident no my cousin hasn't mentioned bills. Some PP have mentioned I should be grateful to be getting free bills for a week.

OP posts:
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