To think buying bikes for no good reason is spoiling.....

[Namedilema123]

3 year old twins have balance bikes they got for Christmas. Absolutely nothing wrong with them. Today DH took the twins to Halfords to get something for his bike. Has come home with 2 bikes for them. Im livid.

They are bikes with stabilizers. His reasons fir buying them are 1. They we're 'only' £40 each. 2. Balance bikes are crap and they need stabilizers. 3. 'you should have seen their faces, they loved them and were having so much fun'.

My reasons for being pissed are 1. It was only yesterday we were discussing how the twins might be getting a bit spoilt between grabdparents taking them on days out every single time they look after them and us and we all needed to change behaviour 2. Bikes (regardless of price) are big ticket items and should be for birthdays or Christmas...just walking into a bike shop and getting them because they liked them is spoiling them. 3. I would prefer them to learn on balance bikes and skip stabilizers alltogether but that's a much less important point. 4. He didnt even call to discuss with me first.

AIBU???

You can get new choppers now I think from the Raleigh website.

Soy a balance bike means a child never has to learn to ride a pedal bike, they just can. It takes all the struggle out of it. Additionally, and more importantly, it's a source of joy and outdoor adventure in and of itself.

Ah ok, it would have saved us a 10 min transition from stabilisers to no stabilisers then.

I think I'd feel a bit silly on a chopper now Aeroflot hmm but maybe dc3 would like one... We really do have too many bikes in the garage though, as we keep all of the successive sizes until outgrown by dc3... Still he's never actually had a brand new bike for that reason... Hmmm

I complete agree with you. Bikes (no matter how cheap) aren't something you buy just like that.

I think I have found my people here There are 6 of us and we have 12 complete bikes at the moment. That figure is skewed as dd doesn't have a bike right now and dh only has one. We also have numerous half built projects

blueskiesandforests you know how people say you never forget how to ride a bike?

I did! I tried last year and made a right fanny of myself. I can go in circles but that’s about it.

I can't get over all the PPs saying stabilisers are pointless.

Our DC don't get to go out on bikes very often because of where we live. Both had (the same) heavy bike with stabilisers. Both had them taken off just after their 4th birthday and both rode immediately without falling off.

Balance bikes look fun but we live in a small flat and have limited storage space for outdoor things (scooters, bikes, skateboards...).

YeTaliShiteHen I must admit I'm not the greatest cyclist. We have excellent cycle paths here, well separated from the road, I wouldn't trust myself cycling in a city, might wobble in front of something My kids are all better than me, including the 7 year old. My older 2 use bikes as transport to friends, shops and activities within a 10 mile radius and it gives them a lot more freedom than would be possible for rural children who couldn't cycle.

Aye my DS1 loves his bike, he’s never off it! My dad takes him out and we’ve just had a new stunt bike track built in the next town over which they love!

Thankfully the wee two are still pootling about on their bikes with stabilisers so I can keep up with them

On foot!

But balance bikes take up less room than bikes with stabilisers. And are so much lighter to carry upstairs etc

What !! He saw a fab bargain. Even if you put them in the shed for a few months / a yr they wont go to waste / be wasted. Anything that gets the kids outside in this digital age ( even kids being 3 ) is fab.he couldnt pass that bargain and was dead right to buy em. You need to chill out a bit . Its summer time. So what if they go on days out too. Its holiday season. Plenty of staying in in winter !!

I get what you're saying, but I got my DC a balance bike at a random time of year as his birthday is in winter... turned out he wouldn't start using it until a year later 😂

Your husband also seems to have misunderstood what a balance bike is for, my DS is no where near coordinated enough for a pedal bike but he loves the balance bike now, plus the lack of stabilisers makes it easier to throw in the car!

In my experience balance bikes are a waste of time and money, DS got a good bike with stabilisers at 3.5 and was off the stabilisers 3 months later. DD is heading the same way. She’s really confident on her scooter, but the balance bike was just a complete pain in the arse for her, because she can’t see the result that she gets when she pedals/when she sees DS pedalling.

We tend to do bikes for Christmas/birthdays - we use them all year round so “summer is the best time to practice” isn’t an issue for us. But we also tend to buy good bikes second hand - DS got his bike swapped for the next size up at the start of the summer holidays in July. It was cost neutral because we sold his too small bike for what we paid for his new second hand one.

He is being unreasonable. Stabilisers are a rubbish way to learn to ride a bike. They actually slow down the learning process. Master the balance bike and then get a correctly sized bike WITHOUT stabilisers. They should master it in minutes.

Balance bikes are the best thing ever. DS was a late walker, and slow and reluctant even after the stage where he would no longer go in the buggy. Getting anywhere was a nightmare.

Then someone gave us an old Puky when he was coming up to 2. He was straight on it, and within a week was happily wheeling around for miles. When he was two I once watched him balance his way down Walthamstow high street (a gentle downhill) for half a mile without putting his feet down.

Then at almost 3 he just got on an old pink Hotrock at my parents house and rode it down the street being held up/leaned on by two 8 year old girls on roller skates. He hasn't looked back, but still also uses a balance bike.

He is the least physically adept child I know, btw. We have been able to go much more interesting places for the last couple of years because of the balance bike (and now pedal bike). There is no other way he could do a 5 mile loop and (importantly) it has taken zero time and effort from me).

I had a beloved old Raleigh Dido, but I certainly couldnt have gone so far on it. Best bike ever, though.

Master the balance bike and then get a correctly sized bike WITHOUT stabilisers. They should master it in minutes

DD1 mastered the bike in minutes straight from a stabiliser bike. So did I, and so did many other children I know.

It seems to me that this is not really about the bikes. It is more to do with the fact that other people in the twins ' life are doing all the nice things with them, buying presents, taking them out and OP is left with dealing with all the mundane stuff with a 6 week old.
I bet she would like the oppotunity to 'see their little faces light up, but isn't in a position to be able to do that.
OP, they won't get spoiled by their loving g/p taking them out. This is what grandparents are for, sometimes to shower their DGc with things and nice experiences and also take the pressure off you for a while.
I had no help whatsoever my my 3( each 2 years apart) and would have given anything to have had some help.
I think I understand how you feel though, and sometimes it can come across as a bit churlish when you are not able to do what you secretly would like to.
I would sit back and let it go ( and just appreciate the G/p input).
You have enough going on without that angst.
Hope you are Ok, OP. This time can be exhausting and demoralising .

My view OP is that you don’t spoil kids with stuff. You spoil them by letting them think stuff is more important than people.

You can have piles of presents and not be spoiled - it’s the attitude around it (entitlement, lack of regard for people) that’s the issue.

blueskies, I am soooo tempted to get myself a chopper in union jack course, or get there indictions Raleigh Burner for me, not D's😂😂😂😂😂. I have bought Isla bike and Frog bikes for him as he has dyspraxia and motor problems. He had stabilisers on his Isla cnoc, they kept falling off, I noticed he was riding well with the one off, so I took it off and he rode off without stabilisers just like that at 5, I was so proud.

Dd has had cheaper bikes as she is not that keen on riding, but still good bikes, from the bike expert is who sells reconditioned quality bikes.

Your husband sounds sweet. Spoiling comes from letting your children have their own way al the time, and them never having to compromise or hear the word no. A bike isn't going to ruin them.

Sounds like your toddlers need to learn about delayed gratification (and your DH too). Loads of studies have shown that it is one of the key indicators in growing up to be happy and sucessful (with whatever indicators they chose to define that with)

IMHO your DH was U. They didnt need the bikes, he bought them on a whim and didnt even give you the courtesy of a quick text in case you already had something planned - what if you had arranged with GPs that they would give them when the dc were ready for them etc

Spoilt and entitled kids dont suddenly spring into being, they are grown over years of the child never having to wait or want for anything or put someone else’s needs before themselves.

Your twins are close to the age where playing together, rather than near/around each other will be more of a feature. They’ll be easier to amuse at home because they will have a friend to play with.
My first campsite holiday with my kids underlined the importance of bonding friendships and shared simple fun being so much better than an itinerary of days out (must go to.....)
Be prepared for naughty togetherness whilst you are ‘distracted’ by your new baby. My sisters (twins) posted an entire dinner set out the letter box onto the driveway when they were 3!
You and OH will work your purchasing and parenting out, it takes a few differences of opinion to gauge the way forward.