To think buying bikes for no good reason is spoiling.....

[Namedilema123]

3 year old twins have balance bikes they got for Christmas. Absolutely nothing wrong with them. Today DH took the twins to Halfords to get something for his bike. Has come home with 2 bikes for them. Im livid.

They are bikes with stabilizers. His reasons fir buying them are 1. They we're 'only' £40 each. 2. Balance bikes are crap and they need stabilizers. 3. 'you should have seen their faces, they loved them and were having so much fun'.

My reasons for being pissed are 1. It was only yesterday we were discussing how the twins might be getting a bit spoilt between grabdparents taking them on days out every single time they look after them and us and we all needed to change behaviour 2. Bikes (regardless of price) are big ticket items and should be for birthdays or Christmas...just walking into a bike shop and getting them because they liked them is spoiling them. 3. I would prefer them to learn on balance bikes and skip stabilizers alltogether but that's a much less important point. 4. He didnt even call to discuss with me first.

AIBU???

It is an impulse purchase, but I think it’s adorable. Seeing as they haven’t mastered the balance bikes, I can see how it will be great fun for them to be able to get out and about on bikes before winter.

Mention to the grandparents that you are feeling overwhelmed with the amount of toys. They don't need new toys every week.

My twins went from balance bikes to bikes without stabilisers and it was a very easy transition.

Just stick the new bikes in the shed and persist with the balance bikes.

I think your husband sounds more spoilt than the kids.

I don't think it is spoiling them to get them bikes they can rattle around on whilst the weather is still good. I get that your DH maybe should have called you first to discuss it but, if buying them isn't going to leave you short of money, then i think he is entitled to make some choices for his DD's on his own.

We are a bikey family of six with untold numbers of bikes in the shed. My four kids all learned to cycle by 4 at the latest, DS2 was 2.

Stabilisers are a complete waste of time; you don't learn to balance with stabilisers. Mind you none of my kids had balance bikes either, just decent quality bikes with the stabilisers taken off. Decent bikes are the key though; they need to be easy to pedal for little legs and have brakes that little hands can operate, (my kids had a bike with a back pedalling brake). You are better getting something decent second hand than #40 shite from Halfords.

Balance bikes are not bikes- they are a training tool (and a middle class fad)

With the new bikes they can all ride together. They can bomb along on them.

Just off to do a 116km ride- learned age 3 on a bike with stabilisers- the love of riding a bike, the speed and the excitement it gives is key. You don't get that with a balance bike.

Don’t worry about it OP. It’s summer and he made an impulse purchase. So what? They’re only little once. Relax and don’t spoil the fun.

They are an expensive present to get for no particular reason. However, Christmas isn't a great time for getting outdoorsy stuff and if they have winter birthdays, the same applies. Arguably, if they already have balance bikes, they don't need bikes with stabilisers as well, but if they are enjoying the new bikes, I don't see the problem. And if they have had the balance bikes for 8 months and still haven't got it, they can't be getting much enjoyment from them. £40 is a good price and if they are looked after, they will have a good second hand value. Perhaps better to try to encourage the GPs not to be constantly buying stuff.

I know what you mean though OP. I'm guessing the people who are answering this thread are 'bikey' families who don't consider a boke a luxury - this is of course fine. But if you're not that type of family, buying a bike on a whim would get on my nerves too.

Stabilisers are fine if you can hack all the bikey types in the park telling you off for using them. They may not particularly help with the technique of bike riding but they certainly help with showing the reason why you would want to - a smidgen of independence!

yabu (sort of)
stabilisers do nothing for learning to ride a bike. balance bikes are so much better. but if they are good quality bikes in a size dc can grow into, then getting the bikes now is great foresight.
just take the stabilisers off.

In principle, bikes are means of transport and not gifts. I don't think the 'spoiling' argument applies here. But 40 quid bikes for 3yos? Too young and the bikes presumably aren't great quality. I'm also anti-stabilisers (though tbh it still took my sons a bit of practice to learn to ride proper bikes despite years of balance biking. Wasn't a huge thing but neither was it 10 min).

Really though, a three year old will have more fun tearing about on a whippy little tricycle than teetering along on a wobbly bike with stabilisers Stabilisers are shite.

YABVVU.

Balance bikes are not a middle class fad, don't be ridiculous. They are a very good way of learning how to handle and manoeuvre a bike before adding pedals.

Stabilisers are rubbish cos they don't help with balance (obviously if the child needs them due to dyspraxia or whatever then they have a purpose) and lengthen the time it takes to really learn how to go a bike.

Correct number of bikes is N-1 where N = the number of bikes at which your non-riding partner starts filing for divorce. According to my husband and his downhill riding pals.

You husband is BU for not discussing the purchase and for thinking that balance bikes are rubbish.

You need to lighten up a bit. He’s their dad - he bought them next-stage bikes to use now, rather than at Christmas. It’s no big deal.

I think he should have discussed such a purchase with you before doing it - I would want to have input to which size, brand, price etc. I also would be pissed off about the stabilisers. And I also worry about my DS (3) getting spoilt by randomly being given gifts I would have waited years for. So in general, YANBU.

However...it is summer, and if they're good on the balance bikes then this is the perfect time... So now they have the bikes just whip the stabilisers off and tell them if they want to use the bikes they better start pedalling. Worked for my son.

Disagree. Not spoilt, doesn't need to be a birthday item.

Plus, balance bike used with/alongside stabiliser bike, means progression onto riding a normal big bike, without stabilisers, is normally quicker.

I agree with buying bikes when kids need them rather than Christmas so they get the use out of them.
But in your case, I’d be pissed off because they should master their balance bike then go straight onto a normal bike with no stabilisers.

I think you need to relax a bit. I wouldn’t call £40 bikes “big ticket items” unless their purchase means you can’t eat for the rest of the month, in which case that’s another matter. You sound a bit controlling about them having to just have the balance bikes tbh.

As for you wanting to stop their grandparents spoiling them by taking them out??? WTF is that all about? Let them enjoy their grandchildren as the DC will love spending time with people who want to treat them and it is sometimes easier to entertain small children by taking them out somewhere. If anything needs to change, just ask them to stop buying toys and get them an ice cream instead.

Chill

Learning to cycle is an essential skill and the summer is the best time to learn. Do you really want to be running around teaching them in December and January?

I think that you and DH are looking at this differently. You are looking at a bike as a material thing whereas your DH is looking at teaching the children a valuable skill.

I don't think it is spoiling children in this situation - but you need to talk about your differences in attitude.

Are you actually annoyed because you see bikes as a big ticket treat and your DH has taken all the glory and credit of giving them only for himself, rather than a 'from Mum&Dad/Santa' gift at Christmas?

£40 is a total bargain and DP is entitled to spoil his DC If he likes. (Try your kids having a DF with cobwebs on his wallet and see how you like that). Grand parents are exempt from the rules of spoiling-It's what they do. Exercise equipment, books and activities such as crafts and play doh don't count as presents in this house, they are necessities. You sound like a joyless miser OP.

Bikes used to be expensive when compared to average earings and only a small percent of the household budget went on non essentials. So they were given for Birthdays/Christmas.

That doesn't apply now and it's makes more sense to buy them outside of Winter. i used to buy mine them for Easter, which some posters are opposed to.

Your children aren't being spoilt by what you describe. They are being shown that they are loved.

I'm 50, we all learnt to ride with stabilisers, as we learnt to use cutlery despite not being baby-led-weaned. It's not a major importance to just do it one way.

Stuff and things don't spoil children it is their attitude and expectation to stuff and things that make them spoiled the twins got a new bike it is fine honestly don't be livid and I bet the £40 bikes will be £60 in November.

Given your discussion the day before it is amazing and thoughtless to buy the bike. It’s almost a slap in the face.
Apart from that buying two new bikes just like that is in my opinion wrong. If they have two perfectly good bikes there is a time and place to discuss buying replacements.