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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to ask my housemate keep her dog in her room

72 replies

Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 00:58

My housemate has just moved into a shared house of four, with her two year old untrained dog. The dog, in two days, has raided all the bins in the house, stolen a housemates dinner (not left out, jumped up on him and snatched it) ripped open and eaten half of my dogs bag of dry food, bullied my dog constantly, and bitten me twice. I have tried to be patient but after being bitten on the hand today, and almost bitten on the face, all because I was holding a stick away from him that my dog had brought to me, I have had enough. My other house mate has also expressed they share my feelings and asked me to speak to her. She shows no control over the dog, or willingness to discipline him. I can't see any other way forward but to insist that he is directly supervised by her, at all times, or kept in her room with the door shut. This seems dramatic but I don't know what else to do. It is not our job to train the dog, and I don't think its fair on myself or my housemates to have to always keep our doors shut, our trash in our cupboards etc. The dog has zero respect or fear, and will do what it wants regardless of being yelled at, I have had to physically drag it out of my room while it was bullying my dog by its scruff, while it tried to bite me.

OP posts:
DPotter · 11/08/2018 01:01

There's no way I would tolerate this type of behaviour from a housemate and her dog. Are you in a position to ask her to move out?

JS374phina · 11/08/2018 01:03

I don't think you are being unreasonable at all. Anything that affects housemates in a negative way should be addressed. I think everyone that lives in the house needs to sit her down and express how they feel. Either the dog will need to attend weekly training or it could be suggested that she find somewhere else to live.

HeyDolly · 11/08/2018 01:03

I don’t think it’s practical to keep a dog only in one room nor is it fair on the dog. It sounds like it would be better to ask her to move out if you can.

Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 01:04

I am, the landlady is a friend and not a fan of the girl. I might start with asking if the dog can go somewhere else first, and give her that option. I'm guessing that her lack of control would mean she wouldn't be able to keep it in her room, even if she agree to it.

OP posts:
Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 01:05

I agree its not fair on the dog, which is why I'm reluctant to suggest it. However I don't think there is any other option at this point, other than as you say for her to move out, or find somewhere else for the dog to go (it wasn't previously living with her)

OP posts:
Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 01:06

Thanks for the support JS374phina

OP posts:
Blondie1984 · 11/08/2018 01:15

Did you/whoever said she could move in know that she had a dog? If it's as bad as you say then not only could it hurt someone - including your dog - but could destroy the house and that, I'm guessing, would have financial implications on everyone...

Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 01:17

Blondie1984 the landlady knows she has a dog. We thought it was well behaved, I guess we shouldn't have taken her word for it...

OP posts:
liverbird10 · 11/08/2018 01:56

YABU. Not the poor dog's fault. Dog needs training, simple as that. So does your housemate, by the sound of things.

liverbird10 · 11/08/2018 01:57

In all seriousness, O P, your housemate needs to leave.

Faez · 11/08/2018 02:03

Tell her she has to enrol in training classes or they go.

sadiekate · 11/08/2018 02:07

Crikey!
To be honest I think you should ask her to leave. She obviously lacks respect and concern for others' welfare and safety, and that will be the case with or without the dog.

Hombre · 11/08/2018 02:08

Possibly it's rattled by your dog? Or maybe it's just a poorly trained pet. Either way, when push comes to shove it shouldn't be your problem as she's a housemate, not a family member, so you don't have to take on an animal that's causing you problems. I agree the dog needs to go and if that means she goes as well then fair enough. What does she say when the incidents happen? I mean, has she got an explanation or more to the point solution for this problem behaviour? Have to say that if any animal bit me I wouldn't be up for sharing living space with it.

chatwoo · 11/08/2018 02:09

On the basis that her dog has bitten you, that's a reason to ask her to move out.

Keeping the dog in one room is cruel and will likely exacerbate it's behaviour.

Monty27 · 11/08/2018 02:27

Sounds awful Shock

Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 02:45

Thanks for the responses.
I'm so stressed I can't sleep.
So worried about being stuck with this dog for another 12 months.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 11/08/2018 02:55

Don't be stressed, take action! Immediately! Get her out.

Original poster
Whateverletmepost · 11/08/2018 03:06

Currently only I and a temporary housemate are here (along with her) and although he's also dead against the dog staying, he leaves in three weeks, and if the other two arent as vocal I'll look like the bad cop.

Wish me luck.

OP posts:
YeahDefinitelyNameChanging · 11/08/2018 04:33

The dog needs to be moved out.

I was attacked by a random off-leash dog a week ago. A few puncture wounds and I’m very lucky it wasn’t a lot worse. If someone can’t train a dog then it shouldn’t be around people.

emmyrose2000 · 11/08/2018 04:44

The moment the dog bit me, I would've kicked both the dog and the owner out.

Even if she took it to training classes, you'd still have to live with the damage and chaos whilst those lessons kicked in. That's not tolerable.

EdisonLightBulb · 11/08/2018 04:54

I'm suprised dogs are permitted in a house share full stop. Four sharers could mean four dogs, potentially chaos. She needs to rehome the dog or move out, but it's the landlady problem not yours surely?

Mummyoflittledragon · 11/08/2018 05:25

Definitely you should complain to the landlady. The other housemates are going to be subjected to the same treatment at some stage. I think until this is resolved you are unfortunately going to have to leave your dog in the bedroom for their own protection. Is her dog much stronger/ bigger than yours?

chronicallyawesome · 11/08/2018 05:34

I've never heard of any animals being allowed in a rented, never mind shared house - I've heard of it being done, but that's different, of course! I think I'd go through the landlady. The dog must go. And in the meantime keep your dog away so in your room or out and about with you, and put your stuff away. If you have needed stitches/a tetanus shot make sure you point that out, or that you could next time, and that if your dog needs veterinary treatment you'll consider her liable.

BlueBug45 · 11/08/2018 05:50

OP please talk to the landlady asap. Make sure you tell her the dog has bitten you, stolen food and raided the bins so is clearly untrained so needs to go. It's in her financial interest to kick the dog out otherwise she won't get other tenants.

I've houseshared in the past with different pets including dogs and none of them have been as untrained as that. The dogs were actually kept in the kitchen when we were out and they didn't raid the bin or steal food letalone bite anyone. (We made the housemates who were their owners re-home them as we decided they were spending too much time on their own.)

Oh and in my case the landlords insisted on meeting the dogs for a couple of hours to check their behaviour towards humans.

adaline · 11/08/2018 07:03

What breed of dog is it?

We have a beagle and he's so led by his nose that all food has to be locked away. All our cupboards have child locks, so does the fridge and the kitchen door has baby gates over it. He's not badly trained, he's a scent-hound and that's what they do. He's smart enough at six months to open the fridge and the cupboards so we've had to put prevention in place so he can't get in and eat the contents!

I'm not trying to defend your friends behaviour at all but certain dogs (especially hounds and labs) are greedy so-and-sos and will do anything to get food if they've not been trained or stopped from doing so.

But given that the dog has bitten you and your flatmate doesn't appear to be remorseful or interested in training the dog I would say they both have to go.