AIBU to think camping is f*cking shit, it’s not cheap and it’s not fun

[Pumkinfailure]

I’m currently a week into a 3 week camping tour of Europe and I’m ready to jack it in. I surely can’t be the only one to find this whole malarkey fucking hideous. Sleeping on a sloping bed in a tent hotter than the devils furnace, kids screaming day and night, neighbours who hate our wellbehaved Placid lab and have instructed us to keep him near to us at all times, never feeling clean, marriage hanging by a thread, no personal space or time alone. Not even wine is helping. And 50 bloody euros a night for the privilege!!
Please tell me I’m not alone on my detest for this form of holiday and share your tips to help me survive the rest of the holiday!

Do any teetotal people camp? All of the 30+ year old avid campers I know (not me) still drink a lot of cider and do mushrooms. And come to think of it none of them have kids.

Can't imagine camping stone sober and with children to manage.

Camping is strictly for girl guides and boy scouts and whatever the crossover options are nowadays. Grown ups do not like going dirty for days on end

Do they?

I don't get what the big deal is with communal facilities. The showers and toilets have doors you know!

Isn't it like getting dressed after swimming every time you have a shower (usually twice a day on holiday)? Clammy skin, wet floor, someone waiting outside wondering why it's taking you so long, you forget your knickers...

No no no no no. I know it's been said but THREE WEEKS?! You are a stronger person than me.

When I get to hell, it will be a tent in a wet field with one communal toilet.

Kids love it.

Adults pretend they do for their kid's sakes.

True? Be honest now.

I often just sling some loose clothes on and get dressed properly in the tent. There isn't always someone waiting. I've been to ones where there are little sink rooms. So often I go on there in my towel and get dressed.

Why would you shower twice a day on holiday? We're going next week to a site that has underfloor heating in the shower block. They are beautiful.

I do really love it. I love sitting round the fire in the evening with friends, watching the sunset. Last year in Northumberland we had amazing clear skies and saw the milky way.

I like the slow, relaxed, simpler feel of everything.

I don't know what's worse...thinking it's going to be fun and finding out its shit or knowing its shit and it living up to expectations.

And the faff.
Endless packing of just in case matches and sleeping bags that aren't comfortable and horrid camping plates that make stuff taste shit.

Or coming home and unpacking damp loo roll, half eaten bags of pasta crap and having to wash everything because it all has a funny smell.

Adults pretend they do for their kid's sakes.

True? Be honest now.

I've been camping more often now my kids are grown up than when they were little and I had to take them with me. No pretence here.

In fact it's far more enjoyable now I just have to pack the bare minimum for me and not all the associated guff for them.

I can see there's a clear divide here. Most of us go on holiday for something 'different'. For me that means simple living, fresh air and sleeping under the stars. For others it's 5* AI's where you don't have to do anything for yourself except breathe and wipe your own arse. Vive la différence!

We love it as a family. I would happily do three weeks .DH loves it and our DC's love it ,we are going soon and We can't wait .Communal showers don't bother me .The fab campsite we use has a shower block. I wear flip flops in the shower and I have forgotten my knickers in the past .But the sitting round the fire pit under the stars toasting marshmallows ,love it .But it is not everyone's cup of tea .

I have memories of coming home from a weekend Cub and Scout camp and stripping off in the hall in order to keep the bathroom clean before staying in a hot shower for nearly an hour.

I still remember what I was wearing. Bra, camisole, t-shirt, sweatshirt, woolly jersey, 'waterproof' jacket. Knickers, leggings, tracky bottoms. Cotton socks, wool socks, hiking boots. Hat. The only bit that was dry was my feet due to the boots.

I luvs my little caravan though. Just me and my dogs, redecorated as a girly haven with my own comfy bed and private loo.

This thread is gold. Eating a whole barbecued courgette to be polite? Brilliant.

There are so many different ways to camp at different stages of your life and different budgets that they way you are doing it at the moment may just not be the right option.

When we were young, broke and child free ex-DH and I used to hop on his motorbike with a lightweight tent and we had a great time.

Later on we got more elaborate tents and then a caravan. Caravans are funny as you end up basically with a mini holiday cottage if you find a site you like that you just stay permanently parked on and go to at the weekend. You end up with a set of friends there and your DCs have other kids to play with.

Camping on a very busy site in peak season just makes you feel like you are being uncomfortable in a car park though. Do you have your own tent with you or are you Eurocamping. If you have your own tent I would try looking for a less busy/lower spec campsite so your dog can get some freedom and you can get some peace and quiet.

Am still laughing at 'a wank deprived DS' and 'the sound of the zip'!

I love camping but agree that you have to have all the gear to get the best out of it. We have gradually improved our setup over the years, learning from experience, and now we have an awesome camping setup (including a massive airbeam tent and awning).

Having said that, 3 weeks of camping touring Europe would be a step too far for me.

Camping is the worst. A holiday involves sleeping well and personal space - camping does not offer these things. Plus, bugs everywhere and no toilets. I am grimacing at the mere thought of it.

Don't get me wrong, the outdoors are beautiful. But they are also beautiful from a cabin or a hotel.

There's a damn good reason people invented bricks. Bricks rule.

I hate it. And every year when I return, swear I will never go again. Then every summer I forget, and put us all through it again!

3 WEEKS camping!!!!??? Fuck that OP. Unless your husband is Bear Grylls then I'd LTB. Good luck 🍷

Just remembered our worst camping holiday ever.

Ex-DH, DS1 (aged 7), DS2 had not been invented yet (he was the result of a camping trip a couple of years later) and me. We were young and pretty broke.

We booked a week on a Haven Holiday Site (it certainly wasn't a haven) on the Isle of Wight. Ex-DH had grown up on Butlins holidays and he loved all the joining in stuff. It's coming back to me now why we are divorced.

DS1 happily went off to the kids club but came out furious at the end because Tony the Tiger was "just a man in a costume, not a tiger".

The weather was glorious - for about 4 seconds and then pissed down absolutely continuously. We had a very basic tent and DS1 had a pup tent beside us, DS1 was on an airbed. We were rapidly running out of money as we were having to "do" things to amuse/cheer ourselves up rather than hanging around in the sunshine and the pool.

One night we were eating a combination of smash, potnoodles and cold beans (anything that could be done with a kettle plugged in to the lighter thingy in the car). And DS1 started crying and saying he couldn't eat in the dark. I shone the torch on him and turned into my mother and got bulgy eyed and bared my teeth (he still brings it up 20 years later).

The next morning I woke up and ex-DH and DS1 were in the car and glaring at me through the windows as I poked my head out the tent flap at them. I shouted "we're going home, now!". We were packed and racing for the ferry in about 5 minutes flat.

I love camping. But THREE WEEKS?!!!
Glamping. That is the answer OP X

I hate camping and refuse to take my children camping. DH is desperate to so he can get on with it as far as I’m concerned.

I hate having to walk across a field just for a shower or even worse, a wee. I hate waking in the night needing the toilet and wondering if I really have to go as it means crawling out my sleeping bag, finding shoes and a torch and walking across a wet field just for a fucking wee.

I hate waking up in the morning and everything being damp. I like space, I like to be dry and I like to be warm.

I agree with a pp. This thread has been so funny

We like to wild camp, no campsite, minimal equipment. I love the primeval feel of it using the art of self reliance.

It is a mugs game.

I love three day camping. No washing required by anyone.

More than that can I have a good shower please. I sleep on a mat old school and want wildlife, beaches and walks but can forgive any amount of noise and chaos. Alcohol did I mention it’s improtance. FACT hangovers don’t happen after sleeping in a tent.